This Post Requires 50 Comments…Ready…Go….

Life is a state of perpetual confusion punctuated by moments of clarity.” Uttered by the mythological creature known as TheJackB. Shortly thereafter he solved five of the world’s greatest math problems, discovered a cleaner and cheaper source of energy and composed 16 new songs. Oh, did I mention that this included a dirge to be played at his funeral.

That is a happy thought isn’t it, a dirge to be played at a funeral. It is even better when you consider that said dirge is supposed to be played at my funeral. Well listen up kiddies. I am going to outlive most of you. I am 42 years-old and have great genes not to mention awesome blue jeans. Don’t go telling anyone else this, but the wacky Shmata Queen once said that she liked the way my butt looked in said jeans. Excuse me for a moment while I duck, I would hate to be smacked in the head with that giant black purse she carries.

Fortunately I am quite safe. My head is far too hard to be hurt by such things.

There is one hell of a post brewing inside my mind now. I have a story that I could tell that would break your heart, melt your soul and cause you to weep and wail. But at the moment I just can’t bring myself to tell it. I suppose in part it is because I am given to long bouts of loopy behavior. Yes, I just called myself a wingnut and I am good with that. I see the world differently than many do. I stand on the outside looking in. Although the funny thing about saying that is that I am one of millions who say the same thing. In fact I read 7 posts today by people who said that they stand on the outside looking in.

It makes for a funny image inside my head. I picture all of us standing around a house looking through the window. Which leads me to think that maybe we aren’t the ones who are on the outside. Maybe it is the people inside the fishbowl that we have created. I dunno.

In other news I stirred the pot about the newest list of the top dad bloggers. They came up with 50 but used funny metrics to do so. I was tempted to write about why I think these things are ridiculous but then I realized that I just did. Let’s face it, most of us bloggers are pleased to be on a list that says that we are among the top 50 of anything. It feels good and it often comes with a nifty little badge that you can place on your blog. Damn if I can’t get enough of those badges and the accolades that come from having them.

On a semi-serious note I am continuing to slam those people who use prizes and giveaways to generate their traffic. Yes, look down my nose at those who call themselves bloggers but do not produce real content.  You people are gaming the system which reminds me that there are ways for me to compete such as typing Click here to get Naked Pictures of Brad Pitt, Kim Kardashian and Angelina Jolie. That ought to be good for SEO.

Sometimes I like to let my hair down and lose the serious posts for a while. I spend far too many hours talking about more effective marketing techniques or how a father should talk to his children about life, death, sex, marriage and education. Damn, I mentioned serious and now I am busy thinking about whether the universe really does send you signs and how to identify them. I am busy thinking about the two major regrets of my life and how I can change them. You see, I can’t quite let go of either. I won’t say that they haunt me, but I am not done with them.

Not done for a variety of reasons not the least of which is heart and head aren’t ready to let go which leads me to believe that there is work to be done there. I like taking the road less traveled and seeing where it leads. I like driving wherever the road takes me and having adventures along the way. Sometimes I feel like I am starring in a Marx Brothers movie except instead of playing Groucho I am the straight man and that my friends isn’t what I want to do in a Marx Brothers movie.

I’d like to take Maxwell’s Silver Hammer and crack a few people in the head. Unfortunately doing so wouldn’t solve the challenges I currently face nor would there be a Yellow Submarine to use for my escape. Ultimately I am ok with that because these mysterious challenges I refer to are making me crazy because they are off in the distance. I don’t like waiting. I want to confront them now so that I can force the issue and move ahead. It is not really a smart way of doing things so I refer back to my letter to my children and the advice I gave them.

It is smart and it is wise. I would be foolish to ignore it, but you know me- sometimes I am the fool who would dance in the fire for that one chance. Come to think of it if the Rapture comes I am supposed to burn or so some people tell me. Hah, I beat them to it, Been burning for a while now so what difference does it make.

Ok kiddies, it is 1:30 AM and I should have gone to sleep two hours ago. Start firing up the comments or go join the Facebook Fan Page. There are no prizes to be had for doing so, at least not now. But you never know, there might be in the future, assuming that the world doesn’t end on Saturday. I sort of hope it doesn’t because I got a lot of things that I want to do. If it did end it would be kind of like not playing the Immunity Idol in survivor. What I mean, is that I have a few aces hidden up my sleeve that I am waiting to play. Would be more than a little disappointed to see those waited.

And with that I bid you adieu and ask you to keep your eyes peeled for the absolutely amazing post that is coming.



  1. Anonymous says

    I’m not sure the naked pictures of Brad Pitt would do it for me? But as there seems to be a LOT of female bloggers, I’m sure you’d get a healthy traffic spike.

    I’ll email my address for you to send the iPad 2 ;)


    • says

      @Paul_Wolfe:disqus Your post about natural talent came up last night. The guys and I had a long talk about it and whether we agreed with your position. It would be fun to conduct a real experiment to see if it is true.

      • Anonymous says

        Well the ‘experiments’ are all around you.

        The famous ones are:  Tiger Woods and the Williams Sisters. These are kids ‘programmed’ by their Fathers to be champions.  Or google Susan Polgar the female grandmaster. 

        Couple more examples I can think of: remember the guy who I think won Chinas Got Talent by playing piano with his feet.  You think anyone’s naturally talented at playing piano with his feet?  (Me either).

        And I was reading an interesting book the other day – it’s called NURTURED BY LOVE by Suzuki.  THat’s the Suzuki who invented the Violin and Piano Methods for teaching children to play music – not the guy who invented the motorbike!

        Anyhow, Suzuki relates a story of two kids found in India in the 40s who were effectively raised by Wolves.  The 9 year old could run on all fours faster than an adult human could run on two legs.  You think that’s natural?  (Caveat – I’ve not verified this by independent research – it sure is a great story though).

        Here’s another one for you – there’s a kid in my son’s class.  He’s 8 years old.  He’s considered ‘educationally challenged.’  And has special tutoring.  This kid’s parents are from the middle east – the kid speaks Arabic and English fluently.  You know how hard that is to do?

        Anyway….always happy to talk on this topic.


        • says

          @Paul_Wolfe:disqus I was referring to experiments that involved me. I think that it would be fun to pick a few things that I would like to become an expert at and than have the opportunity to try it out.

          When my children were young I intentionally placed them in Hebrew immersion programs. At home we focused on English but at school they only spoke Hebrew.

          I am convinced that we can do a lot more with ourselves than we think we can. But I haven’t come to a conclusion about whether natural talent is as you say a myth or not.

          • Anonymous says

            Well if you wanna start an experiment I’d be happy to try and help by laying out the strategies you need to take to maximise your learning- the principles are reasonably straight forward.

            And I agree with you about the potential that we all have – for most of us that potential is smothered in a cloud of dormancy…watching crappy TV….surfing the blogosphere….answering comments…wait, answering comments! I’m outta here – but the offer’s good.

  2. says

    So, is it 50 comments in total, or 50 comments from actual readers? Because if it’s total, then you only need 25 because you’re good about the replies and can bump your numbers up right quick that way. (I have a lawyer in the family. He’s rubbed off on me.)

  3. says

     G’Day Jack,
    As I’m basically a cooperative sort of bloke, I’m writing a reply.

    As I think I may have mentioned to you, “Keep your eyes open and your mind ready.” I’m not quite certain what that means. I like it because I composed it.

    And please continue to contradict yourself. Inconsistency and self contradiction are proof that we’re human.




    • says

      @3884c43f625610ab1bb99b677867ea2a:disqus  Well Leon I am quite appreciative of the comment and the advice. I think that open eyes and a ready mind are quite important.
      Enjoy your weekend too.

  4. says

    Hmm, liking the Survivor reference and post tease there Jack ;-) You’ve got a fun writing style man, this made me smile as I sit here in my car on Friday afternoon in a parking lot, waiting for my next appointment to finally get home. ;-)

    Have a great weekend…keeping my eyes open.


    • says

      @twitter-92096544:disqus  Hi Marcus so glad that you stopped by. I wish you much success with your next appointment- they need a  super size swimming pool and you are just the man to do it.
      Enjoy your weekend.

  5. Columbiarose says

    Have you noticed that each of your posts contains at least two contradictory, mutually exclusive assertions or themes, each true in their own way but irreconcilable? Or, you do it on purpose? It’s actually gotten to be kinda fun to see what pairing is gonna be in each new post.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

CommentLuv badge

This blog uses premium CommentLuv which allows you to put your keywords with your name if you have had 3 approved comments. Use your real name and then @ your keywords (maximum of 3)