Fifteen Minutes In Five

I need 15 minutes to do a proper job of writing this post but only have five so we’ll adapt and overcome.

One of my favorite songs, but for some reason often forget about it.

It is fascinating to me and why some memories stick and others disappear. A mix of good, bad and in between they slumber and rise on their own schedule.

Got some conversations I need and want to have but am not sure when some of those will happen.

Can only control what we can control so we do our best to manage the rest.

Such a strange time of life when you feel like you know everything and nothing. When you know that one call can turn everything around and that it isn’t an impossible dream.

But still it is not as easy as just wishing it into existence.

Some changes are forever, two weeks until the first anniversary of my father’s death. That is one that isn’t going to change, he is gone forever.

If there is an afterlife and we find each other there that would be great, but it doesn’t change things now.

And so we just do our best to roll with the changes.

Times up, five minutes is over.

So Far Away

Got called a Texan, a carpetbagger and a few other choice names during the recent past and so I find myself reading/listening to stories about big earthquakes back home.

It is surreal to hear/read these things and to be so far away, especially with my mom, kids and so many other loved ones there.

The thing is I have lived through thousands of quakes and know the difference between the 4s, 5s and 6s.

It is exponentially different and if you haven’t felt one you don’t know that Mother Nature can make you feel very small without effort. Or maybe you have experienced some other natural event and appreciate some of this.

My daughter is sleeping at a friend’s house. They are without power and she is very calm. It is not the first time she has been through being without power or earthquake.

I talked to her and she was more interested in rushing me off the phone to hang out with her buddy so I was glad for that.

Didn’t tell her it is a little uncomfortable to be so far because there is no reason to. Chances are nothing will happen and there is no reason to worry her, so instead I share it with you.


Other Stories

There are other stories to share and tell but I think I may hold off on those for a bit. Mayhap to share them elsewhere or to wait until the morrow to give them their full due.

Do they have to do with the quote above?

Why yes they do.

Will Soulmates or discussions of soulmates be part of it/them?

Perhaps.

For now they remain so far away.

A Letter To A Girl

He wrote a letter to a girl but wasn’t sure if she got it so he put it a few different places online and periodically checked to see if there were signs she had received it.

Sometimes he considered using what younger people would call ‘old school’ tactics such as sending a handwritten note or asking Ma Bell to help him reach out and touch someone.

He wasn’t sure if she had ever seen his handwriting and less sure about whether she would be able to read it.

The thought of poor penmanship creating issues made him snort.

He could write her a letter that would make her melt, something that she would think was the most romantic and thoughtful thing she had ever received but poor penmanship could destroy it and instead of instantly melting she would do the opposite.

That wasn’t the kind of hot you wanted to make a girl feel.

So he thought again about the telephone and wondered if she would pick up or let it go to voicemail. Should he rehearse so that he could say exactly what he wanted using the perfect intonation?

What if he burped or coughed halfway through?

That might ruin the moment.

What if she picked up and he said something really stupid by mistake?

Truthfully he was less concerned about that. Hell, he was most confident about having a discussion in person but that wasn’t going to happen without an invitation.

And he wasn’t sure if the invitation would happen without the letter which is why he posted it in multiple places and wondered why she wouldn’t just read it.

A Quick Blast

I have watched a bunch of clips of Notting Hill and remembered how much I enjoyed it.

Got a short list of movies I haven’t seen in the theater yet that I plan on going soon. Since I am living the bachelor life I have the opportunity to go and see them in whatever order I want.

Sometimes I forget how much I love having the ability to make every big decision without having to do the negotiation thing and or create a list of pros/cons.

Ok, I have my internal list of pros/cons but it is always different when you are the one making the final decision.

Living It

I think I am doing a pretty damn good job of living out that ‘find what you are afraid of and live there.’

Not so sure I did it intentionally, but here I am…doing my best.

Doing Life Wrong

I am not a fan of whining especially when you have some control over whatever is causing you to whine but that doesn’t mean I never have my moments.

The last few weeks or so have been filled with the sort of grind it out to get through the day experiences that have me feeling like I might be doing life wrong.

Moments where I look at all that surrounds me and wonder if the common denominator in the madness is me.

Maybe I am not very good at making choices and maybe this sick feeling in the pit of my stomach is there because deep down I know I have to take the blame because who else is responsible for the situations I am working through.

Granted there are some things that really had nothing to do with the choices I made or didn’t make but it doesn’t mean I can step around them.

So here I am, feeling like I am walking in broken glass and trying not to fall. Just got to get one step closer to the other side and things will improve.

I think. 🙂