The Words We Write
My 11 year-old nephew has discovered girls. I think that it is kind of funny to say that he discovered them because it is a little bit like saying Columbus discovered America. It makes me laugh just thinking about it. It reminds me of Brandi Knox. When we started the summer break between 7th and 8th grade she didn’t look any different from any of us boys. But that magical thing called puberty kicked in over the summer and she came back to school with a chest that made the teachers jealous.
Ok, that might be an exaggeration. It is almost 30 years and my memory is a little fuzzy in that area. All I know is that not only did she suddenly have curves that hadn’t previously existed she smelled really good too. For all I know I am the one who changed and not her. Puberty does funny things to kids.
I did tell my sister that I thought that it was all pretty funny to know that she is old enough to have a son who likes girls. Not so sure that she appreciated hearing that. She turned 40 this year and is adjusting to being really, really old. Say, can you tell that I am an older brother.
Gini Dietrich complained that she had nothing to write about and then tore off a post that generated almost 300 comments. Actually the post is just short of 250 comments but I wanted to try to protect my accuracy just in case there is a rush on commenting on it. Between Ingrid, Bill and Davina anything is possible.
Superman and I are making a push to make Odd Dad Out into a rising superstar. Even though Father’s Day is coming I suggest that some of you check out Jessica’s jewelry giveaway. Speaking of women, if you are of childbearing age you might want to stay away from John, one of the most virile bloggers on the planet. But I should add that he is one of the best, a very fine man who I am glad is a friend.
Speaking of nut jobs from around the Dad blogosphere my buddy Aaron is right up there. He is a rabid fan of teams like the celtics (no caps for those bastards), the Sox and the Patriots. That makes him a degenerate who is in need of a severe beating and perhaps a lobotomy but he is also one of the good guys. Part of the reason why I was so disappointed to see the Lakers and celtics miss a chance for a rematch was because I was looking forward to busting his balls over it. There is real joy in going at it with those celtic degenerates and more importantly, he is a good guy.
Since we are on this impromptu tour you might want to go see JR who is running a contest to pick up one of Jim Higley’s books. Both are good men.
Let’s shift gears and talk about…me. Yeah, what about me. Well, we shall talk about my About page and my AboutMe page where I threaten to put a bullet between Bambi’s eyes. Part of blogging involves promoting yourself. Or maybe it is more accurate to say that if you want to monetize your blog or use it to generate money making opportunities than you have to figure out how to let people know who you are and why they should read you.
My pages aren’t bad but they aren’t great either. They need to be tweaked to better showcase my abilities and to let people know a little bit more about what to expect here. And that reminds me that I would love for you to join me on Facebook and become a Fan of TheJackB.
Again there are no decoder rings, no signed 8×10 glossies or any benefits other than being kept abreast of the developments here. Really it is just me asking for you to help me convince more companies to spend money with me so that I can get more toys like an iPad2 or pay for little things like tuition.
So let’s recap, 1ooo points of light, stay the course, a 1,000 points of light..stay the course.
P.S. Should anyone from high school be reading this let me remind you that I founded the Apathy Club. It was funny because no one showed up for meetings. It wasn’t funny when you knuckleheads stole my idea and took a picture of yourselves sleeping and put it in the yearbook. One day you’ll pay for that. Really, you’ll wake up and find rabid squirrels in your trousers…