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He takes out the trash and gives her flowers

November 12, 2004 by Jack Steiner 6 Comments

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A woman in my office just finished telling us about how her husband takes out the trash and brings her flowers. I listened and then explained to her that I was going to have to hurt him for breaking the chain.

There is a code of ethics for the married man, a list of things that you do not do.

1) Do not lower the toilet seat, make her take responsibility and look before she sits down.

2) Under no circumstances do you ever give her flowers.

3) Do not take out the trash or respond to other similar requests until you have been asked at least 3 times.

4) Understand that if you break the code other men will come to administer your punishment.

The list is actually much longer than this, but I am too busy to provide it in full. Suffice it to say that if you break the code, you will be punished. And dad gum it, this dude has got to get his. If we don’t jump on this now he’ll mess it up for the rest of us.

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Comments

  1. mquest says

    November 13, 2004 at 2:02 pm

    Thou does not bring lunch to his wifes work.
    Thou will never dress up to meet her co-workers

    Reply
  2. Hokule'a says

    November 13, 2004 at 7:02 am

    Its ok Selena…you were right the first time… seriously. I love the little gadget that I saw on MSN that flashes a gentle green light that tells us ladies that the toidy seat is in its proper position…DOWN its red for the up mode….I saw another one that puts the seat down automatically very cool…as I live with an untrainable husband that does take out the trash all the way to the dump, but will not give me flowers as they die…and the toilet seat…forgedaboutit…

    Reply
  3. SelenaJ says

    November 13, 2004 at 6:12 am

    Well I came back to delete my post because it seemed a little harsh LOL but the whole delete thing is no longer there. I’m sure there are good men out there who either do or do not take out the trash. Sorry if I offended any males.

    Reply
  4. Jack's Shack says

    November 13, 2004 at 3:14 am

    Tim,

    Email me at talktojacknow@sbcglobal.net. In the interim you can look at:

    http://wwwjackbenimble.blogspot.com/2004/11/bush-vows-second-term-push-for.html#comments

    Reply
  5. SelenaJ says

    November 13, 2004 at 12:44 am

    My husband did all these things without me asking. He still ended up being a dead beat cheating bastard. So just because he takes out the trash does not mean he’s great.

    Reply
  6. Anonymous says

    November 13, 2004 at 12:19 am

    Jack this is Tim. I don’t know how else to get a message to you. Sorry for putting it here.

    I was wondering what your view is on this subject:

    http://abcnews.go.com/International/wireStory?id=248646

    I’m looking forward to reading what Stace, and you think since you have both have been to Israel.

    Tim

    Reply

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