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Bedtime Approaches And Sleep Beckons

December 24, 2004 by Jack Steiner

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I have been listening to the soundtrack from the Lord of the Rings, or should I say pieces of all three movies. It is beautiful and moving and I cannot help but get caught up in it. This computer will die long before I tire of praising the power of good music. Wow.

The last two weeks of the year are an odd time for me at the office. It is a mixture of twiddle my thumbs and look for something to do and last minute frantic requests for help.

I am looking forward to 2005, this has been far too eventful a year for me and now I hear that my grandfather is experiencing a few health issues. At 90+ it is to be expected, but it is still a little distressing. Moreso because the conversations with my son have had me thinking about death.

I am not afraid to die, but I am not looking forward to it either.

I actually watched two movies this week. I like movies a lot, but usually have too little time to see them. Saw the Last Samurai and The Bourne Supremacy. They were good, not amazing but good, Still working on pre-production components of the documentary of this blog.

Got caught staring at the same woman twice today. She think that I was staring at her chest, but I was really trying to figure out the fishnet top thing that she had on. It was a fashion faux pas. Got caught again later when I was staring at the tight leather pants she had on. I was trying to figure out what was in her pocket.

I have my own shortcomings, the hard body is not as hard and the clothes are not Beau Brummelish, but I have enough sense to dress appropriately for my age. Ladies, at some point you have to give up on the idea of dressing like a teenager, especially if age and gravity have had their way with you.

I need a haircut. My hair is thinner in places than it used to be and as a consequence it doesn’t lie properly anymore. When I keep it short is easier to handle and much better looking. Eventually I will just shave my head and be done with it. It will be easier to get ready in the morning, but harder to keep my kipah (yarmulke) on my head. I may have to glue a velcro strip to my head and one on the kipah.

The only problem is that this might make the highly efficient TSA folks at the airport more suspicious. I understand that they are not patting down women’s chests anymore so I figure that the best way for me to take my contraband on a plane is to wear a bra. My suit jacket is a 46, not sure if that translates well into bras, but I am figuring that whatever I get will be fairly large, big enough to substitute as a soup bowl.

Of course if you are caught drinking soup out of a bra people wonder about you. The question I ask is are they more upset at the idea of me wearing a bra or drinking out of it. Better yet, how did I get on to such a ridiculous topic. As long as I am talking about it allow me to share the other component of this exploration into the daft and dumb.

I get hungry on planes, so I figure that I’ll need some snacks and since I am going to have to stuff my bra I might as well fill it with snacks. So I suppose that I need to make it a D or DD cup because the flight from here to there is longer than I like to wait to eat.

The other advantage to stuffing my bra is that if airport security gets too suspicious or too friendly I can reach into my top and whip out a Snickers or Three Musketeers bar. While they enjoy themselves I can waltz on over to the gate.

Ok, enough of the boob bit. It is time to hit the sack, I am spent. Lailah tov from Los Angeles, see you in the am.

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