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The Life I Could have Had

January 27, 2005 by Jack Steiner

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There are many people who struggle to find themselves. I would argue that most do. It is a topic that I feel like I am intimately acquainted with and something that many people blog about. One of my semi-regular stops is over at Shtreimel’s Place.

Shtreimel is a man caught in a quandary about his place in the world. And as I said before I think that is a common theme and one of the reasons that blogs hold so much interest to people. We seek answers and we seek people who share common experiences and challenges.

Today I wrote Shtreimel briefly about my past. I was once in love with a woman who became a BT. I remain convinced to this day that if I had done the same, if I had chosen to become religious too that she would have agreed to marry me.



I didn’t go down that path because I do not believe in making radical changes overnight. Personal change should be a process, a journey that you undertake. It should not be something that is done without careful thought or consideration. There are many risks that are involved in change but you must weigh your steps and measure the risk. You have to identify what risks you are willing to undertake and those that you are not willing to.

Life is a risk and as such you should not avoid them, but there is no sense in jumping into the flames to determine if the fire is hot. Life is a journey that you begin at birth, it never ends.



And no journey is without it’s shar e of challenges and that is ok and to be expected. A little adversity is good for building character and growth. Everyone should challenge themselves and try to extend their boundaries a little bit.

I haven’t any regrets about the life that I chose not to undertake. It wasn’t the right path for me. I may still become BT one day, or I may not. But I am going to take those steps on my schedule. Some journeys coincide with those of someone else and sometimes the paths diverge. The trick is to pay atttention to your own path and those of your loved ones so that you can focus on taking the trip together.

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