I spent a chunk of time today trying to figure out how to add a drop down menu to my blog. In theory I wanted to find a way to organize the best out of more than a 1000 posts as well as provide myself with an easier way to reference stories/posts for future use.
What I found was that I am far more repetitive than I had realized. The same topics continue to pop up with little to no new insight. There are no new angles, just a slightly different way of saying the same silly things.
It made me feel foolish. It made me feel disappointed in myself. I can do better. I love the interaction. I love knowing that people are reading this blog and that I am able to engage in a dialogue with people I might not ever encounter.
But ultimately this is one of my places of refuge. It is a place I come to in times of happiness and sadness. It is a place that I use to gain a better understanding of what my thoughts and feelings are about life, parenting, religion and myself.
And if I fall short of the mark it is not you who is being sold short, but me. Ultimately I am the judge and final arbiter of what is good and I haven’t produced enough quality relative to the number of posts.
I am going to try and do better because if I do not improve then this becomes a pointless exercise and a waste of time.