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"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

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Blog Spam

August 8, 2005 by Jack Steiner 12 Comments

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I must have finally arrived because I am starting to receive copious amounts of blog spam. It is the non sequitur responses you see on some posts. Things that come from an anonymous source with comments like “That was funny, now click here for some great cheesecake recipes” or “hope that you check out my blog www.ilovenakedsex.com.

Which brings up another point, why would you need a domain for naked sex. I understand that sometimes you and your partner are so crazed that you don’t remove all of your clothing, but there is something strange about the term “naked sex” or so it seems to me.

BTW ladies I guarantee that there are at least three of you wondering about why men do not take their sox off during sex or how to make that happen. There are answers to these questions and solutions such as take a shower with him because wet socks are really uncomfortable.

I don’t know that from experience as I have never showered in my socks, but I do know from experience that walking across a wet lawn will drench your socks and add a pound of water weight to each foot. The upside to that is that the increased resistance will help you burn an extra 25 calories per quarter mile.

All you need to do is walk about 10 miles in your wet socks and you’ll have burned off enough to eat a slice of cake. Of course you’ll need new socks because the formerly wet ones will have dried off in which case at some point you’ll have lost some of the resistance and you’ll have burnt 12.5 calories per quarter mile. So you better make that walk closer to 20 to 25.

On the other hand you might consider putting on a pair of running shoes and training for a marathon or do what I do and sit outside with a fan, three boxes of Krispy Kreme donuts and a gallon of coffee and taunt the poor slobs who spend their Saturday mornings running.

Now what was it that I was writing about?

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Comments

  1. Jack's Shack says

    August 12, 2005 at 2:07 am

    Q,

    Depends on what position you are in. 😉

    Reply
  2. Stephen (aka Q) says

    August 12, 2005 at 1:58 am

    What I want to know is this: how many extra calories do I burn off if I’m wearing wet socks during sex?
    Q

    Reply
  3. Jack's Shack says

    August 10, 2005 at 6:05 am

    Please tell me how to get his socks off.

    It is all part of our quick exit plan, you know the instinctive fight or flight thing.

    Reply
  4. PsychoToddler says

    August 9, 2005 at 11:15 pm

    Now that I think of it, Soxy Donut is a pretty good radio or internet name. I may need to do something with it.

    Of course, that’s how Psychotoddler got started…

    Reply
  5. Sam says

    August 9, 2005 at 10:30 pm

    Please tell me how to get his socks off.
    Argh!

    Reply
  6. Jack's Shack says

    August 9, 2005 at 7:42 pm

    PT,

    How did you come up with that one. 😉

    DR,

    It must work or they wouldn’t keep doing it.

    Suzie,

    🙂

    Reply
  7. Assorted Babble by Suzie says

    August 9, 2005 at 7:18 pm

    Just starting to get some spam!! not in the can either! (lol)

    On to the socks, trying to remember past lovers wearing them, for some reason not one pops up in my mind however I like wearing my high heels does that count? (lol)

    Perhaps a few may make note about calories burned…and try it. (smiling)Great post! The last idea was a good one as well.

    Oh yeah…the answer is SPAM! A few brain cells left here…Suzie to Earth!! (smiling)

    Reply
  8. dorothy rothschild says

    August 9, 2005 at 6:51 pm

    I wonder if that ever works, the blog spam. I mean, do the spammers ever do anything but just piss people off? I don’t get it about email spam either.

    Reply
  9. PsychoToddler says

    August 9, 2005 at 3:50 pm

    OK that was me.

    Hee hee

    Reply
  10. Soxy Donut says

    August 9, 2005 at 3:50 pm

    mmmm….sock flavored Krispy Kremes….

    i luv ur blog

    cum visit mine

    http://www.krispykremesox.com

    Reply
  11. Jack's Shack says

    August 9, 2005 at 4:28 am

    I am just nuking them.

    Reply
  12. TRW says

    August 8, 2005 at 11:56 pm

    I started getting that on my address book. Those comments I can edit, though, so I just left the “I like your blog” and took off the link!

    Reply

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