More Weird Stories

Here is why you shouldn’t argue with the man giving you a tattoo, not to mention another reason to drink beer later and not during.

“Walnut Cove, NC — A Pine Hall man is in Baptist Hospital, recovering after an attack involving a butcher knife.

Stokes County Sheriff’s Deputies were called to a home in Walnut Cove around 3:30 on Wednesday morning. When they arrived, they found Tony Wagoner missing both ears and suffering from a butchered penis.

The Sheriff’s Department says Wagoner went to get a tattoo from 29-year-old Gary Thomas Johnson. After a few hours together and after consuming alcohol, Sheriff Mike Joyce says a fight occurred between the two men and 18-year-old Jennifer Arlene Robbins.”

They need more exciting activities in Canada.

Rocking to a world record

“Suresh Joachim is rocking his way to his 31st world record.

The 36-year-old Mississauga man, who holds 30 Guinness World Records, is working on his next feat: 75 hours of continuous rocking in a rocking chair.

“It’s very comfortable,” he said after one-and-a-half hours of rocking at the Hilton Garden Inn in Mississauga, Ont. “But maybe too comfortable.

“I’m rocking back and forth, so I’m going to get sleepy. That could be a very difficult problem.”

But Joachim is no stranger to making it through long, repetitive stretches of time. Among the other records he’s set:

  • 100 hours of bowling
  • Longest time spent standing motionless 21 hours and 30 minutes
  • Longest modelling on catwalk, 133.2 km
  • Longest time spent balancing on one foot, 76 hours and 40 minutes
  • Travelling up and down an escalator continuously for seven days
  • Longest distance travelled while carrying a 4.5 kg brick in an ungloved hand, 126.675 km
  • Longest dance marathon, 400 hours
  • Longest non-stop drumming marathon, 84 hours
  • Longest non-stop band performance by a 14-strong group of musicians, 42 hours and 52 minutes
  • Longest distance traveled while balancing a milk bottle on a head, 133.3 km
  • Longest distance crawled non-stop, 56.6 km
  • Longest radio DJ marathon, 133.2 km
  • Longest movie-watching marathon, 53 hours

The nice thing about spending 75 hours in a rocking chair is one has lots of time to plan for the future.

And prepare for the future is just what Joachim did.

First, Joachim cracked open Tiger Woods: How I Play Golf to learn the sport he plans to play continuously for 100 hours next year.

Next, he practised guitar so that he could get ready for his attempt at 100 hours of guitar-strumming (no word yet on whether he’ll play the same song for the entire stretch).

And then he started flipping through Elvis Presley and Ricky Martin lyrics for an upcoming 100-hour karaoke marathon.

He also plans to set the record for the longest non-stop TV watching marathon (72 hours), but he doesn’t really need to practise for that one.”

This boy has some real issues.

“NEWBURYPORT — A 19-year-old man from Salisbury was supposed to be cleaning up a cemetery last week as part of court-ordered community work after he broke into an apartment building last fall.

Instead, officials said, Neil J. Goodwin Jr. invaded the tomb of a Civil War veteran, pulled apart the 142-year-old skeleton, and then played with the bones, balancing the skull on his shoulder and posing for pictures.

”It’s bizarre, absolutely bizarre,” said Lieutenant Richard Siemasko of the Newburyport police. ”I can’t even imagine what was in his head. This is just a whole new level of weird for me.”

Goodwin pleaded not guilty yesterday in Newburyport District Court to a charge of desecrating a corpse and breaking into a tomb, both felonies. Prosecutors said he was doing community service in the Old Hill Burying Ground on Aug. 17 when he kicked in the thin marble entrance to a tomb marked ”1863 Pierce” and twisted off the spine, collarbone, and skull.

”Every time you think you have seen it all, something like this happens,” Siemasko said. ”We just can’t understand why anyone would do this.”

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