Cell Phone Hell

I need a new cellphone. I used to have one that I was very happy with. It was a Motorola V300 and it took care of most of my needs quite ably and capably. Unfortunately along with my car it was a casualty of the auto accident that took place a couple of weeks ago.

Even though the auto accident was not my fault my insurance company has said that they will not cover the replacement cost of the cellphone. I contacted the other party’s insurance carrier and have asked them to cover the cost of the replacement, but I have yet to hear back from them.

The adjuster who is handling things for them hasn’t returned a telephone call in three days. She has until noon today and if I have not heard from her I will go over her head and make life less comfortable for her. I hate having to do things like that, a simple telephone call would have satisfied me but now all she has done is aggravate me unnecessarily.

In case you are wondering my cellphone provider will not provide a replacement phone unless I chose to pay for it. At the time that I acquired my last phone they offered me a monthly insurance plan of $5.99. In ten years of cellphone ownership I had never lost or broken a phone so I thought that it was silly to pay $72 more each year for that service.

All this brings me back to the topic of the post, cell phone hell. I say hell because it feels like I am one of the damned. I have grown so accustomed or should I say addicted to having a phone I cannot help but notice that I really miss it.

And all around me I see all of the various cell phone service providers offering free phones, but there is a catch. Those phones are only available to new customers. The existing customers don’t get a free phone or any sort of free upgrade. They get the privilege of being able to purchase the phone at a discount and the discount is almost always tied into extending your contract for another year or more.

Somewhere I hear Satan laughing. I feel the heat of his breath and I know that he is taunting me because those new phones are better than what I had. They offer new features and bells and whistles that amaze and delight.

I cannot help but be irritated that T-Mobile wants me to pay $250 for a phone that they will give away as part of activation of a new line of service. Something in this relationship smells, it stinks. It is a rotten way of doing business and I have to admit that because of my frustration with it all I am tempted to pay the early termination fee and then just sign up with a new provider who will give me one of those free phones I see all around me.

Halloween is coming and instead of the thump thump of the tell-tale heart I hear the electronic ring of a phone. It haunts me yet.