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"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

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You Just Aren’t that Funny

January 8, 2006 by Jack Steiner

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That was the subject line of an email to me. It said, “You Just Aren’t that Funny.” This was followed by a longwinded explanation of what comedy should be and why I didn’t fit the mold.

I agree with the person that emailed me. I am just not that funny, the problem is that we never identify what it means to be “that funny.” If I knew what it was then maybe I could grow up to be “that funny.”

I included that in my response to them and in return they told me that people who are “that funny” don’t have to ask. So I told them that I wasn’t asking, I was demanding that I learn how to be “that funny.” I mean, why not teach me how to be “that funny.” I expressed how happy I was to have received their correspondence because if I was “that funny” I would never have met them and my life would be ever so dull.

Apparently this response did not please them and they asked me not to be upset that I wasn’t “that funny” and that if I just accepted it they would enjoy my blog much more. So I agreed, I won’t be upset that I am not “that funny.” But I insisted that as part of the cost of this agreement that they become my fourth wife.

This didn’t go over that well and they expressed that they had no desire to be number four. I told her that it was good to be ambitious but she really wasn’t “that smart” or “that cute” so she should take the offer.

Apparently this upset her and she told me in more colorful terms that I am still not “that funny” and that I am probably not going to be able to stay married for very long. I told her that was why I was asking her to be my fourth wife at which point she recanted and said that I really am “that funny.”

Ain’t life grand.

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