The guys at the gym don’t know that I have a blog. It is not something that I generally volunteer. I have been cautious about who I have told about this little corner of cyberspace. I have general anonymity.
I say general because there are some uninvited guests who have found me. Some of them have tried to use this place to create problems. Some have taken my words out of context and twisted them. It is not something that I am pleased about but such is the way of the world. There is reality and then there is virtual reality.
One of the downsides to this virtual reality is that it is sometimes used by people who are less scrupulous. It is used as a playground by them, a place that they can frequent in search of playmates.
It saddens me to see how some of them go about their business. I am disappointed to see men seeking companionship in a less than forthright manner. The net offers you the opportunity to present yourself in virtually any way you wish. You can be the stud. You can be the fantasy, the dream lover. All it takes is a little work and you will find someone who is willing to accept you in that role.
In more specific terms there are men out there who send out emails in which they profess their love for a woman. The problem is that instead of sending an email they are actually sending out bulk emails in which they blind carbon copy ten, fifteen, twenty or perhaps a 100 different women.
These women receive these letters in which the man proclaims his desire and love for her. He showers them with attention knowing that someone will be flattered. Someone will respond to him and if they just open their heart a little to the possibility of virtual love their may be a love connection.
I know about this because there is a former blogger who made the mistake of including me on his list, not once but a couple of times. I made it clear to them that this was a mistake and that I didn’t appreciate it and that he was playing with fire.
I haven’t made the email public because I do not want to embarrass any of the recipients of this email but at the same time I feel like I need to mention that this is taking place.
I believe that you can find love over the net but I believe that it still requires time to get to know the person on the other side of the keyboard. I don’t believe for a moment that all of the men/women out there are like this, but I am not naive enough to think that he is the only one.
These are real people and real lives that are being played with. I hope that he grows up and recognizes this before it is too late.
Melliferous Pants January 12, 2006 at 11:11 pm
I’ve experienced my own challenges with internet dating, but this is new…it’s terrible.
Zeruel January 12, 2006 at 5:16 pm
“Forgive me for the perhaps inappropriate comment – but why would you be on this guy’s love list?”
Didn’t you know? Jack dresses up as a woman during the weekend. Then he is known by the name of Jacqueline 😉
Well, are those mass mails justified when you aren’t getting any because you’re ugly??
Jack's Shack January 12, 2006 at 2:03 pm
He didn’t intend for me to be on the list. It was a mistake that he made when be Bcc’d everyone on it.
Pragmatician January 12, 2006 at 12:17 pm
You’ve pointed out one of the most dangerous aspects of the online world, virtual words and conversations can affect people and yourself in the real world without anyone realizing the immediate connection
Ze'ev January 12, 2006 at 9:25 am
Forgive me for the perhaps inappropriate comment – but why would you be on this guy’s love list?