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Polygamy Would Be Bigamy

March 16, 2006 by Jack Steiner

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That is the old joke, you know the one. Polygamy would be bigamy. I don’t know if it is really all that funny, but we still tell it anyway. Newsweek is running an article about how polygamists are fighting for their rights.

“Not anymore. Hammon, who’s involved in a polygamous relationship, is a founding member of the Centennial Park Action Committee, a group that lobbies for decriminalization of the practice. She’s among a new wave of polygamy activists emerging in the wake of the gay-marriage movement—just as a federal lawsuit challenging anti-polygamy laws makes its way through the courts and a new show about polygamy debuts on HBO. “Polygamy rights is the next civil-rights battle,” says Mark Henkel, who, as founder of the Christian evangelical polygamy organization TruthBearer.org, is at the forefront of the movement. His argument: if Heather can have two mommies, she should also be able to have two mommies and a daddy. Henkel and Hammon have been joined by other activist groups like Principle Voices, a Utah-based group run by wives from polygamous marriages. Activists point to Canada, where, in January, a report commissioned by the Justice Department recommended decriminalizing polygamy.”

I have thought about this from time to time, polygamy that is. Back in my early twenties the boys and I used to kid around about how it would be great to be a polygamist. You’d have seven wives, one for each day of the week. They’d all live in a house with the kids and as men we’d have our own private palace where we would entertain them.

It was a story that was good for a few laughs, but it was never taken more seriously than that. We all had a very clear ideas about the challenges and difficulties of trying to keep that many wives happy and I suspect that more importantly most of us were worried about how to be truly intimate with that many people. I don’t know for certain as it wasn’t something that we discussed. When you are trying to be cool you don’t express that softer side.

But that is not the purpose of this post. The real purpose is to say that I am not really sure if I have a problem with it. If people want to engage in polygamy what harm is there. I haven’t any issues whatsoever with gay marriage.

I suppose if I had to write an essay about the pros/cons of polygamy I could do so, but off the top of my head I am having a hard time coming up with serious arguments against it. Provided that all members are willing and involved in a loving relationship, what harm does it cause.

The biggest issue that comes to mind is the problem with favoritism. There could be issues created by that, but beyond that I don’t know.

Maybe I’ll write Shola and ask what he thinks.

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