Here are some of the recent notes I have received from readers.
Dear Jack,
You used to be funny. What happened?
-Sam
Dear Sam,
You used to have hair. What happened?
Regards,
Jack (could be considered a funny retort, or just snarky.)
Dear Jack,
Why don’t we see any pictures of you?
Thanks,
Misty
Dear Misty,
Don’t take this the wrong way, but I wonder about people with porn star names.
-Jack
Dear Jack,
Is that your wife wearing the cockroach?
-John
Dear John,
No, it is my brother Franz Kafka.
Dear Jack,
Stacey’s blog needs updating. You usually pretend to be her and you. What are you going to do about it?
-Sam.
Dear Sam,
Congratulations, you made it on this list twice. Now if you only made sense we might have something to work with.
-Jack
Dear Jack,
Why doesn’t your penis talk to you like Neilochka?
Regards,
Your elbow
Dear Elbow,
I used to be funny without resorting to dick jokes. Or didn’t you read Sam’s comment from above.
-Jack
Dear Jack,
I know that you wrote Datingmistress Jerusalem. Just admit it.
-???
Dear ???,
I guess that you are trying to be mysterious. A word of advice, when you do this don’t email me from your office.
Thanks,
-J
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