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"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

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I Lost An Old Friend

July 31, 2006 by Jack Steiner

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I wish that I had a good story to tell about this one. I really wish that I could regal you with a tale of heroism and valor. In truth I could make one up. I have a decent imagination and have been known to spin the occasional yarn.

Before I go any farther I should let you know that this particular friend has been with me for years. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that he had been around for decades. I was sad to see him go. He wasn’t an emotional vampire, this wasn’t a one sided friendship. Sometimes friendships just end.

I can’t say that the end was totally unexpected, but I didn’t think that it would go like this. It was so sudden. One moment he was there and the next he was on his way out and I was left standing there slackjawed.

Did I mention that my cheap friend didn’t bother to take all of his crap with him. Oh no, that would have been the decent thing to do. Nope, the cheap bastard left me holding onto some of his things. I guess that he thinks that Jack’s Shack is a storage facility.

I’d charge him rent but he’d never pay. Aww hell, the truth is that over the years he has always been there. I suppose that I am just being unfair, but how can I not be. After years of service it is not right to take off like that.

Enough of this sentimental crap and down to brass tacks. What really gets me irritated is that the quick exit is going to cost me a couple of bucks and a visit to the dentist.

If you haven’t figured it out yet, I cracked a tooth tonight. Just what I needed. Feh.

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