Poop Patrol

I live in an ordinary home in a ordinary neighborhood in an ordinary suburb. Most of my neighbors are pleasant people. They take pride in their homes and do a nice job of working together to maintain the neighborhood. This is not to say that we do not have our share of kooky neighbors. To the best of my knowledge we do not have any inhabitants who resemble those of 1313 Mockingbird Lane.

I am pleased to say that during the six years that I have lived here there have been a handful of times in which I have been upset about the behavior of the neighbors. The most recent problem has been with some teenagers who like to park their car across the street from the house so that they can spend some quality time together.

You try explaining to a six year-old why the boy is jumping up and down on the girl or why the car keeps shaking. But I digress.

A new issue has developed and this does have my attention. Someone has decided to let their dog use my front lawn as their canine commode. Three days in a row I have found the evidence of their time here. This is not something that I will tolerate. If you have a dog it is your obligation to clean the crap.

So as of 7:30 AM P.S.T. the house is on red alert. The poop patrol has been notified. I will catch them and I will see that they understand that this beastly behavior ceases immediately. If not I will take the appropriate steps to see that the situation is rectified.

Just as a dog marks his territory you can mark my words. This is war.

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