Sudan- We Will Strangle The World Cola Supply

The Sudanese ambassador has issued a threat in response to new sanctions on his country. Here is an excerpt from the Washington Post.

“It cannot happen,” he said, “so rule it out.” As for the Sudanese regime itself: “We are the agents of peace, people like me, my colleagues who are in the central government of Sudan.”

What’s more, the good and peaceful leaders of Sudan were prepared to retaliate massively: They would cut off shipments of the emulsifier gum arabic, thereby depriving the world of cola.

“I want you to know that the gum arabic which runs all the soft drinks all over the world, including the United States, mainly 80 percent is imported from my country,” the ambassador said after raising a bottle of Coca-Cola.

A reporter asked if Sudan was threatening to “stop the export of gum arabic and bring down the Western world.”

“I can stop that gum arabic and all of us will have lost this,” Khartoum Karl warned anew, beckoning to the Coke bottle. “But I don’t want to go that way.”

Someone better warn this guy not to irritate the Diet Coke drinkers of the world. I know more than a few who will lose their minds without this drink. They say it is not addictive, but we know better. Go through with this threat and ten million housewives will pour into the Sudan and wreak havoc like you have never seen.

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4 Comments

  1. Jack's Shack June 1, 2007 at 6:21 am

    Mark,

    When you wake up with a broken case of Pepsi don’t go calling me. Those Coke guys are rough.

    Sea,

    You said it.

    Babka,

    Thank you for helping to prove my point. 😉

  2. The Babka Nosher June 1, 2007 at 2:27 am

    Don’t mess with my Diet Coke. Things will get VERY UGLY if there isn’t an ice cold Diet Coke in my hand first thing every morning. I may have to kick a little Sudanese ass myself to rectify this situation.

  3. seawitch June 1, 2007 at 12:27 am

    Oh the humanity! Taking away our coke!

  4. Mark May 31, 2007 at 10:46 pm

    Pepsi’s better.

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