Bulletproof Baby

I stumbled onto Bulletproof Baby earlier today. At first I wasn’t sure if it was a parody or not and then I realized that it was not. After reviewing it I have a few thoughts to share with you.

If you live in a place in which you need baby armor you probably should be trying to get out of there. A Riot Shield for the baby seems a bit over the top.


The BPB Riot shield is an ultra light fully interlinking riot shield that allows an individual or formation to survive extreme attack from rocks, petrol bombs and shotguns. The line of interlinked shields gives a safe barricade behind which all the members of the family can hide in safety. In opposed house entry situations the linked shields give total overhead protection.
These shields out-survive older types many times over as they are exceptionally durable. Even after repeated axe and stone attack, the shield survives. We regularly test with huge axes against these shields. No other competitive design survives.

I must admit that it is easier for me to see the utility of the bulletproof stroller below.


A must for mobile baby protection, the Heavy weight bulllet proof stroller provides 100% protection against all modern ballistics including Armor Piercing rounds. It’s heavy enough to maintain stability even under a heavy barrage, and yet has light steering enabling the stroller to turn on a dime if required. For the smart urban baby.. this stroller is the ultimate in style, comfort and extreme combat protection.

Maybe I am being a bit unfair, but it just seems like these items are a little bit out there.

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  1. Jack's Shack August 24, 2007 at 3:02 am


    Could be.


    You said it.

  2. Val August 23, 2007 at 9:08 pm

    If you live where you need these items, perhaps raising a family isn’t your #1 priority.

    MOVE! 😉

  3. Michael August 23, 2007 at 8:10 pm

    I wonder if that shield is marketed to toddlers who won’t ever listen to ema and abba?

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