Just Shut Up Already
I just deleted 650 words from the finest post that many of you will ever read. It was a masterpiece in which I shredded several bloggers and I don’t mean that in a good way. Â Rather I used my bully pulpit to point out their stupidity and the general inanity of their posts in such a way that it couldn’t be misunderstood.
But because I am always thorough I made sure to type slowly so that they could keep up. It really wouldn’t do to have Heckle and Jeckle miss out on being told that they make vapid sound like a compliment.
And then in a fit of insanity I deleted those words. I thought that it might be better to simply rerun Why Your Post Sucks and Everyone Hates Your Blog. Now there is a post that garnered great attention, notoriety and awards that no other blogger has ever heard of.
Come to think of it, most of the awards in the blogosphere are things that no other blogger has heard of. Maybe it is because we have a habit of making up awards to give out to other bloggers. You know what I am talking about, the ones that come with a pretty badge and a URL that links back to the blog of the blogger that gave it to you.
Pretty slick. I call you cool, stroke you and then in return you help give me some good loving, er link action. Â Hot links from other bloggers are nice, but they still aren’t as tasty as those you find on a barbecue. Yum, just thinking about some good barbecue makes my mouth water.
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But then I make the mistake of remembering the 650 words I deleted and I lose my appetite. I lose it because I am grumpy, in desperate need of sleep and sick of stumbling onto 1,983,387 posts about how to become a better blogger. I wish that most of you would just shut up already.
You are not adding anything new to the conversation or providing any sort of benefit. And to add insult to injury your 5 month old blog has 238 comments showering you with accolades that you don’t deserve and haven’t earned. You haven’t been blogging long enough to have your own voice and your grammar is atrocious.
Not to mention that you are giving out misinformation about how easy it is to make money online. If it was as easy as you make it sound everyone would be doing it. Â I don’t doubt that some people are making money online. I know some of them and none of them made anything significant in less than two years of hard work. Color me confused by how you claim that if people would only pay $47.98 for your foolproof plan they would suddenly be internet millionaires too.
It is not true and we have a better chance of getting rich from the Nigerian prince who has decided that you are the person that he wants to share his fortune with. Just shut up already.
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I have a separate message to those who write me asking about why their comments never appear on my blog. It is because I find your comments to be offensive, obnoxious and unnecessary. I don’t care if people disagree with me. I am happy that others have differing opinions and look forward to learning from others.
But there is a polite and adult way to voice that difference of opinion and some of you just don’t seem to get that. If you leave comments in which you say that I am an idiot and then fill the box up with two or three links to posts you wrote they better be good and they better add to the discussion.
If they don’t I won’t post them and I won’t acknowledge you or that you wrote them. I don’t have to publish them nor do I have to post a commenting policy. There are lots of other places to hang out on the net and more than a few of them are probably filled with people who unlike me think that you are Hemingway reincarnated. Â Just shut up already.
Faryna August 28, 2011 at 11:28 pm
@marianne.worley
Marianne makes an excellent point. If an e-book can teach you to make $100k/year by following it’s instructions word for word, it will easily sell for $10k assuming they have someone from Harvard Business Press confirming that the e-book turned out the results with five readers.
Consider that if you want to buy a sandwich shop on the corner and the gross receipts are $300k for the year. They’ll sell that business to you for nothing less than $600k. Because they can prove the business makes money and theortetically you’ll make money for many years to come.
So what does a $27 price tell you? It tells me that the author doesn’t believe what he/she is selling. Because if they were just giving away meaningful and use-able intelligence out of the goodness of their hear, the price would be symbolic. Let’s say around a dollar. Or a Euro.
TheJackB August 28, 2011 at 10:55 pm
@torczyner That is an understatement.
torczyner August 28, 2011 at 6:47 am
Cranky this morning?
benbarden August 26, 2011 at 1:39 pm
@TheJackB Hi Jack, I’m doing fine thank you. 🙂 How are you?
I’m often looking for new angles, new ideas, new posts to write. I’ve found that it’s great to write on a Sunday and use the week for social media and for thinking up new posts.
The comment spam blog is at spamcomment.com 🙂
TheJackB August 25, 2011 at 1:16 pm
@benbarden Hi Ben, how are you. Been a while since our Triberr days. I don’t think that every blog is bad or that every post about blogging tips is useless. But I do feel like I have been pointing and clicking my way from one bad blog post to the next.
And while I don’t believe that there is only one way to blog much of the advice is just bad or the regurgitation of things others have said.
Sometimes we have to take a step back and think for a moment about a new angle or find a different topic to write about..
Your blog on weird comment spam sounds like it could be a lot of fun. Some of this stuff is both peculiar and funny.
TheJackB August 25, 2011 at 1:11 pm
@marianne.worley Livefyre has a variety of settings. You could set it up so that you can moderate comments before they are posted. You can whitelist and or blacklist individual posters as needed.
I sometimes wonder how many of these bloggers truly believe in what they are selling and if they have thought about how many units they have to move to start making real money. Even if you made $25 on every $27 ebook you sell it requires a significant amount of volume to make real cash doing it.
I see it differently if you are using it for supplemental income, but that is a separate story altogether.
Most of the time I manage to ignore the noise from the blog polluters out there but lately it has become a bigger issue for me. Can’t decide if it is because I am less tolerant or because it is more prevalent. Probably more of a tolerance thing.
TheJackB August 25, 2011 at 1:05 pm
@Leon Good to see you Leon. I told those Livefyre folks to fix your situation so that they wouldn’t have to face your wrath.
The third rule is in many ways the most important of them all. If the reader misses your message it is a significant problem.
benbarden August 25, 2011 at 12:42 pm
Hopefully my blog tips blog doesn’t fall into the category of a crap blog! One of the reasons why I have a blogging blog is because I try to share tips that actually work, tips I’ve tried, and things that other bloggers seem to miss that I think are fairly important.
As for comments, I don’t get a lot, but the thing I’m strict about is spam. Other than blatant spam that hits the spam queue anyway, sometimes I do get some “borderline” comments where the person doesn’t really say a lot, but seems to want a backlink. I have a whole blog dedicated to the really weird comment spam that I get from time to time. It’s light relief for what has become an endless battle.
I just noticed I don’t have your blog in Google Reader… I’ll rectify that now. Hello again 🙂
marianne.worley August 25, 2011 at 12:37 pm
I’m also weary of the posts that claim you can make $100K a year if you buy a $27 ebook… I won’t even get into the grammar issues and typos because I might start ranting like my 6th grade English teacher, Mrs. Lott. Many bloggers seem to be forcing themselves to publish more often than they’re capable of, just to get more page views, comments, and accolades. Like you said, “Just shut up already.”
Separate topic: Does LiveFyre allow you to screen comments (say, from certain trolls) so they never even appear on you blog? Or, do you have to see a comment get posted and then delete it? Just curious.
Leon August 25, 2011 at 12:20 pm
G’Day Jack,
And here was I not bothering to comment because Livefyre wouldn’t accept my comments. Silly me! I’m having another go because I ‘d be remiss If I denied you the opportunity to dismiss my little impertinences.
But I gotta admit Jack, that lots of bloggers don’t seem to understand the First Rule of Writing: Writing is about the reader, not the writer…… or the Second Rule: Edit your own work viciously……. or the Third: If they can’t understand what you write, you’ve failed.
And that it was Robert Mager who wrote way back in about 1970; “If your job isn’t fun, change your job.”
I’ll cast my scribblings upon Livefyre’s mercies once again
Regards
Leon
TheJackB August 25, 2011 at 9:44 am
@Shonali Well then I look forward to seeing you upon your return.
TheJackB August 25, 2011 at 9:44 am
@Faryna Stan, just had a Full Metal Jacket Flashback, but it came with a nice long chuckle. Here is to you too. 😀
SimoneB444 August 25, 2011 at 9:12 am
@jetts31 @thejackb Love it! By the way, you want to tackle the Klout crap?!
Shonali August 25, 2011 at 9:02 am
Well, tell us how you really feel. :p I have to rush but I will be back later. This is TOO good a post to pass up commenting on!
twowisegals August 25, 2011 at 8:59 am
@jetts31 @TheJackB @twowisegals are still praying and wondering how little Hayden is doing? Better, pray tell?
Faryna August 25, 2011 at 8:40 am
I almost pulled out a bottle of Jack to toast you. But my GF told me to simmer down just after I gave my window shaking cheer: Kill ’em all, Jack! Kill em all!!!
I’m going to find me a walk-in closet to disappear into and I’ll be toasting you from there, buddy.
TheJackB August 25, 2011 at 7:44 am
@MurrayLunn That love fest is nice once in a while but it does make it much harder to figure out where you are falling short and what you can do to improve.
Ultimately I didn’t post that list because I don’t think that they would get it and it would end up as being just negative energy.
TheJackB August 25, 2011 at 7:37 am
@DrDrRose what can I say, I like pushing the envelope. 😉 Hope you can visit here again.
DrDrRose August 25, 2011 at 5:26 am
Borderline offensive rant, but I’ve got to say, I’m lovin’ it.
Dina
http://www.itsnotaboutnutrition.com
MurrayLunn August 25, 2011 at 4:34 am
I get a lot of shit because I told people that I delete comments on my blog even if they’re well thought out because I’ve found them to be worthless to the conversation, so I know what you mean.
You should have posted the post, just saying. I did the same with my own, calling out people that later was deleted but I think it’s good to do these kind of posts overall because someone has to say it.
In fact, I would have loved to see myself on the list because I want real criticism instead of the fluff you generally get from readers.
What bloggers really need to be doing is creating content around projects they’re working on so people can see how it evolves instead of just pulling a topic out of their ass and writing some sappy list.