Jesus Hates Tim Tebow & 17 Other Reasons Why Your Blog is a Failure
Tim Tebow (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Let’s get a few things straight I may be Jewish but I know that Jesus hates Tim Tebow. How do I know? Because he told me so.
It happened last night. I had just finished playing two hours of basketball and was driving home when a voice came over the car stereo. Here is a partial transcript:
“Jack, I want you to know that I hate Tim Tebow?”
“Uh, who is this and what are you doing inside my car?
“You know exactly who this is, it is Jesus, Jack.”
“Jesus, I think you are in the wrong car. I play for the other team.”
“I want you to blog about this. I want you to tell all the people in the blogosphere that I hate Tim Tebow.”
“Yeah, sure. That ought to go over well. As soon as people see me writing about you I am going to get flamed by a million angry readers. Got anything to say about that or any advice you can offer?”
“Pick New England to win by 17 and stop eating Pop Tarts at your computer.”
Unfortunately he didn’t leave me with the Shroud of Turin, Holy Grail or even a Grilled Cheese sandwich with his image on it but I got a ton of other good information from him. Just wait until I hit Texas next month, they’ll love me there.
******
It is always gratifying to see that 2012 in the blogosphere has started by another 1,964 posts about how to become a social media expert in three easy lessons and 2,822 posts about how to become a professional blogger. Not to mention the standard 872,092 posts about how to comment on a blog.
I am mad as hell and not going to take it anymore. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Stop spewing out garbage in which you repurpose the garbage that your blogosphere neighbor spewed out about the importance and need to do XYZ in blogging. It wasn’t original, unique or interesting the first 1,987,332 times it was written.
But the real reason it is so bland and damn irritating is because you never inserted an opinion into it. You don’t say what you think. You don’t share what you feel. You just write something that you hope every one will love. You don’t have to go out of your way to offend people but you shouldn’t be afraid to share your opinion either.
We’re adults. It is ok to disagree. It is healthy. You should be challenged on your beliefs and opinions and you should challenge others. You can do so civilly. You can dig into things and spend a few minutes trying to figure out whether there is a purpose and reason to believe as you do.
And the reality is that you don’t always have to base it upon logic. Sometimes we don’t like something or sometimes we believe something for arbitrary reasons. Life doesn’t have to operate based upon logic and reason. Sometimes you can veer off the track and that is ok.
*****
I’ll tell you what else drives me crazy. I hate visiting a popular blog to discover 1,000 comments agreeing with them. WTF people. Guy Kawasaki and Chris Brogan are people. They make mistakes and are wrong sometimes. (BTW, I used their names because people know them not because I have posts of theirs to link to.)
Challenge the writers of the post. Ask them to defend what they wrote. Ask smart questions that make them think and we’ll all learn together.
This doesn’t happen enough for my taste. Some of you put the “sycho” in sycophant.
*****
There is no single way to blog. There is no one right way to blog. Â Anyone who tells you otherwise needs a good old fashioned bowl of STFU and my boot in the behind.
But that doesn’t mean that your blog can’t be better and more interesting.
- Find your voice.
- Post consistently.
- Sustain your effort.
- Cultivate a community.
- Have an opinion.
- Don’t be afraid to fail.
Sugar Jones January 17, 2012 at 1:43 pm
God Bless you, Brother Jack. I hate hearing social media buzz words. I love to hate on a new thing (Google+) and then have to eat my words several weeks later when I fall madly in love with it. I hate reading How-To’s that don’t give me more meat. Why or why not, and who the hell cares. People ask how to get followers. I usually tell them “drunk tweeting.” That’s code for “Tell it like it is, yo!”
Jack January 17, 2012 at 3:21 pm
Sugar,
I hear you. I am far too cranky and crochety to listen to all the experts off key crooning about how to sing this song.
Makes me want to smack them twice and then once more for good luck.
Deena Fischer January 13, 2012 at 6:33 pm
Jack,
I hate to be the psycho in your psychophant metaphor(Hey, I had to make a misspelling choice… You made yours, I made mine…) but I love this post!
It drives me nuts that so many people write for readership rather than to really say what they mean. Take a risk folks… That’s what life’s about!
D
Jack January 13, 2012 at 11:19 pm
Deena,
I am with you. Write what you feel and what you think- it is far more interesting.
Daddy's in Charge January 12, 2012 at 8:27 pm
Jesus spoke to you over the car radio? That sounds like a bunch of hooey. Just for that I’m taking Denver to cover the 13.5 point spread. 🙂
Jack January 12, 2012 at 9:53 pm
I can’t stand the Pats but this is the one time I am going to root for them and not just cuz Jesus said they’d win.
Chopperpapa January 12, 2012 at 3:14 pm
I love you dude, in a perfectly heterosexual for sort of way.
Jack January 12, 2012 at 9:52 pm
Works for me.
DorkDad January 12, 2012 at 9:05 am
Interesting that this post came into my life at this time (must be another act of Jesus’s direct intervention… one Jew to another).
I’ve been ruminating alot about the relative *lack* of growth of my blog. As I do the soul searching I realize that it’s not an *opinion* blog so there’s nothing potentially controvercial coming out of it. Additionally, I don’t have a lot of amazing challenges to overcome (divorce, sickness, unemployment) so the inspirational-factor isn’t there to generate buzz.
Ultimately, it’s a fluff-blog. Nothing heavy, nothing controvercial, and that means fewer Facebook and Twitter “shares”, less viral potential. But you know what? I’m OK with that. I’m staying within the scope of the theme that I wanted to work under. If that means my functional audience doesn’t get much beyond the 50 friends and family that would be interested whether or not I blogged, so be it.
The next time I talk to Jesus I’ll put in a good word for him to annoint you a prophet.
-DorkDad
Jack January 12, 2012 at 11:48 am
Hi DD,
I am curious about something. Have you tried to market/promote your blog or have you relied upon organic growth?
DorkDad January 12, 2012 at 11:58 am
Purely organic growth.
“Market/promote” sounds so serious. Using words like that makes me think of what I do with my small business. I certainly don’t plan on taking my blog as seriously as I do that.
-Dork Dad
Jack January 12, 2012 at 12:06 pm
I understand what you are saying but I asked because you said that growth had leveled out.
With the proliferation of blogs out there it is hard to break through the noise so I was curious to find out if you were doing anything to make that happen.
DorkDad January 12, 2012 at 12:18 pm
In the spirit of your OP, you have to know who you are, what your voice is, what you want to say, and what you ultimately want to get out of your blog. Those things change organically as your blog develops over time. At first I had rather grandiose ambitions of developing community and fostering fun discussion. As those things really haven’t materialized I’ve come to realize that it’s really just more about sharing.
Obviously I’d love to get 1,000 hits a day. But being small-time means I get to stick with who I am, rather than force-feed my blog something artificial purely for the sake of generating traffic. It makes the feedback, comments and “shares” that I do get that much more valuable.
I guess that makes mine part of the background noise. But that’s OK.
-Dork Dad
FishSticked January 11, 2012 at 8:01 pm
“Don’t be afraid to fail.”
I’m glad to see this here. Failure is something I’m trying to prepare for. Something I think I may need. Something to force me to see things differently. Nothing epic, necessarily, just something to set me on a new path.
Jack January 12, 2012 at 11:46 am
Failure can be a great motivator and educator if you let it.
Dina January 11, 2012 at 4:19 pm
Gee, I hate to agree with you after what you said about all the commentators agreeing with the blogger, but I do think you are right about this. There are too many blogging “experts” out there and people nee to realize that having a blog does not make you an authority on blogging.
PS, you have to read the article Rabbi Shmuley Boteach wrote about Tim Tebow and the public’s general annoyance with him. It’s on the Huff Post.
Jack January 11, 2012 at 4:46 pm
Blogging about blogging is among the best ways to get comments because if there is one things bloggers love to talk about it is blogging.
Read the article and wasn’t impressed. Rabbi Boteach and I disagree on a bunch of things and not just about Tebow.
I appreciate your telling me about it.
Hajra January 11, 2012 at 12:04 pm
Hey Jack,
I am tired to reaching blogs that talk about blogging tricks which I can never use. It took me months to grasp the meaning of SEO and its relevance and it might take me another year to actually practice all that jazz. Either you explain it to me in simple understandable terms or please don’t bother. Aren’t there just too many blogs about blogging?
There might be number of reasons a blog fails. But as long as one doesn’t keep writing crap, half the battle is won! 🙂
Jack January 11, 2012 at 4:44 pm
Hajra,
Content will always be king. It can easily make or break a blog.
Mimi Meredith January 11, 2012 at 8:15 am
What!? I’m soooo miffed. I hear all the time about people being called by Jesus to a profession or even a shoe sale (which I often think is an echo of their own voice, but that’s a topic for another conversation…) and now, you tuned into a direct line and got the message I suspected was true all along? (Yes, this from me the June Cleaveresque Presbyterian Elder and lifelong follower of the Big Three.) What frequency were you on?
I am just tired of bloggers talking about blogging, period. But I guess it’s natural. If you hang out with people who host cooking shows they’d talk about the right lighting angles and how to make squash look appetizing on camera. I think I’ll go write something controversial. No one ever argues with me. Except when I openly admitted that I did not vote for Bob Dole when I lived in Kansas.
Jack January 11, 2012 at 11:46 am
Mimi,
I have asked Kenneth to share the frequency with you.
You are correct conversation reflects those we hang out with and that can lead to the infinite loop of posts.
Looking forward to reading something controversial at your place, can’t wait.
LIndsay Bell January 11, 2012 at 6:56 am
Oh, and in honour of your post, some easy listening for you! (:15 sec ad opens the vid – it’s worth the wait!) 🙂 #jesusbuiltmyhotrod http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXCh9OhDiCI&ob=av2e
Jack January 11, 2012 at 11:44 am
Can never get too much easy listening.
Joe January 11, 2012 at 6:39 am
I totally disagree with you here, Jack. I hate people that put personality into blogging. I love those Twitter lists and lists of blogging do’s and don’ts!! Really, what are you going to tell me next? That I shouldn’t spend all my time on Twitter and Facebook? Sheesh! 😉
Jack January 11, 2012 at 11:43 am
Joe, in your honor I am going to write an eBook that tells you how make millions of dollars, lose weight and bang hot chicks.
Jayme Soulati January 11, 2012 at 5:43 am
AMEN. Love this post and you’ve spurred me to challenge a woman who refuses to GP and hates Triberr but would only rant on Twitter. Gonna do it.
Our post publishing soon…because you spat hard in comments yesterday.
Jack January 11, 2012 at 11:42 am
Challenge, push, berate and pull her into sharing something meaningful. You are just the person to do it. 😉
LIndsay Bell January 11, 2012 at 3:53 am
ThankyouThankyouThankyouThankyouThankyou Thankyou……ad infinitum.
I blog like I talk. When I talk I’m usually pretty opinionated. Ergo – my blog has opinions in it. Will I be making money off it anytime soon…? Not a snowball’s chance in hell. But that’s not why I write.
Great post. And Jesus loves all his little children, Jack. 😉
Jack January 11, 2012 at 11:41 am
So you blog like you talk? Well I do too, or so I think.
Opinions in blog posts make me very happy.
P.S. I got a note today that says that Mr. J hates me for not loving him.
I love feeling so loved. 😉
Renee Schuls-Jacobson January 10, 2012 at 7:17 pm
Well this ought to get you some reaction, you douche-bag! 😉
I agree that I wish there was less ego stroking on blogs and more real dialogue. I’m about to post something, and I expect I’ll lose half my subscribers.
I’m petrified, but I’m going to do it.
I will say I don’t think you should post more than once a day. It’s too much for readers. Once a day is plenty. How’s that for a little disagreement?
Jack January 10, 2012 at 10:53 pm
Write it. Don’t fear it. Write it. If people don’t like it they can always go elsewhere
I understand what you are saying about not posting more than once a day but we disagree on this. I build my community around me (http://www.thejackb.com/2011/05/06/blogging-tips-build-your-community-around-you/.
Readers are free to read some or all of my posts. Some days I post once and some days I might post 5 times.
The community I am building understands that just as I understand that they may not choose to read all that I publish.
Carolyn January 10, 2012 at 6:37 pm
Jack, I have to agree with Mark. I’m thinking it was the anti-Christ because Jesus doesn’t hate. I’m thinking that means you have to be a Tebow fan now, but I’m no theologian.
Love the article. Oops. I wasn’t supposed to say that was I? But I do agree that it often happens that bloggers who blog about blogging are often interchangeable.
I’ve been at this almost a year and still am clueless about what posts are going to get great traffic and which will be duds until they’re hits six months after they’re posted, when they’re discovered by search engines. Go figure. Maybe I need to read more about how to blog?
My goal isn’t necessarily to gain traffic, but to help people with tech. If I help even one person, I feel as if I’ve achieved my goal.
Goal? Did someone say goal? We’ve come full circle. Are we rooting for Tebow yet?
Jack January 10, 2012 at 10:56 pm
Hi Carolyn,
Nope, not going to be Tebow fan. I don’t believe that is likely to change any time soon.
One of the things I love about blogging is the unpredictability of what posts will go big and which won’t.
Some of the best things I have written are ignored while some of the worst are commented on, passed around and celebrated.
If you actually have a goal you are ahead of quite a few bloggers. Many say that they do but in practice they don’t have anything more defined than “I hope people read this.”
Janet Callaway January 10, 2012 at 5:41 pm
WOW! Jack, I had no idea you were so connected. Now I am well and truly impressed. How can we ever doubt anything you tell us when we know who supplies you with content for your blog. Simply amazing.
Congratulations on your blog title which will no doubt attract many, many people to this post and should make for some very interesting comments. Look forward to checking back to follow the thread.
By the way, I thought you were giving up eating pop tarts at the computer as part of the new healthier you.
Jack January 10, 2012 at 10:59 pm
Hi Janet,
I try not to name drop, but I have the connections that nobody needs and everybody wants.
You are correct, I am giving up eating Pop Tarts but today I admit to having slipped a bit.
For my penance I spent an extra 35 minutes on the treadmill. Felt really good.
Bill Dorman January 10, 2012 at 5:31 pm
Was I mistaken, or did I only count 16? How can we be better bloggers if you are giving us incorrect info?
You have touched on this a couple of times; do I hear the beast rumbling from within? Yes, it can be a huge echo chamber and there is more than a fair share of ass-kissing, ‘guru’ worshiping going on. I got over it and just quit chasing; my stuff I can take care of, the other it’s all just noise.
I sense restlessness in you my friend; stay the course.
Jack January 10, 2012 at 11:05 pm
Hi Bill,
Actually there were 34, but who is counting.
The beast is always rumbling- there is a perpetual fire in the belly. That is part of what drives me. Most of the time I am good with it.
But I won’t lie and say that the demon doesn’t rear his head every now and then. It is part of the fun of being me.
Mark Harai January 10, 2012 at 4:30 pm
I disagree with all this crap!
Jesus doesn’t hate football players, he hates baseball players… You must have mistaken who were talking to.
Maybe is was Lucifer??
You certainly have creative ways to make a point Jack : )
Jack January 10, 2012 at 11:07 pm
Hey now, The Dodgers were my first love. There was a long time where I believed that one day I would be the left fielder.
Wouldn’t surprise me to find out that I was talking to Old Scratch. Told that son of a bitch more than once that I am twice as mean as that fiddle player.
I’ll run his ass over with the car, shift into reverse and then do it again.
Watch out, blogger talking tough. 😉
Hope you are a having a great day.
bridgetstraub.com January 10, 2012 at 4:10 pm
You are rapidly becoming my favorite writer!
Jack January 10, 2012 at 11:08 pm
Thank you, that is very kind.