The Bidet Is Not A Water Fountain

BIDET * SPRAY * STOP

I like to think most people are kind-hearted souls who would never try to convince their friends that a bidet is a European Water Fountain and that it is customary to use it to both wash your hands and drink from it.

Did I mention I am grateful we didn’t have this sign hanging around the restroom during our trip to Europe because if we did I might not have convinced those drunk college students to foster their European sides by using the aforementioned bidet.

But karma is a funny beast and in the time before the Modern Age when we used to film the proof of those fellows proving they were more European than the Europeans was lost in the X-Ray machine at De gaulle Airport.

Yeah, that long wistful sigh you just heard was me thinking about how much fun I could have had if I could have uploaded those pictures to Facebook, talk about blackmail material.

They probably wouldn’t have appreciated it, but I bet they would have appreciated being able to ask a friendly European face to confirm that some friend of theirs was messing with their heads.

A Crappy Thing

Years later it is sometimes referred to as that crappy thing you pulled in Europe. I prefer to say that Crap Happens, but that is just me.

Hell, they are probably luckier it didn’t happen now because I could have turned the whole thing into a slide show or video about why people should use Cottonelle and not rely upon European Water Fountains.

Some of you are probably shaking your heads now trying to figure out how I could have convinced them to use European Water Fountains and wondering what could have pushed me to do such a thing.

Well I can neither confirm nor deny that such a thing ever happened or that I was ever given a reason to come up with a revenge prank of my own.

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