She Is Hungee and I am Drowning

My daughter is busy learning how to construct sentences. She is steadily working on how to string words together that make sense to not just her but the world around her. It is a tough gig because at less than two it can be tough to make yourself understood.

Some things have been easy. She mastered the art of the female look of death which just proves my theory that it is instinct and not learned behavior. Along with that she figured out that screaming will get a response. It may not be the one that she wants, but it will get her some attention.

Her latest word is now “hungee.” No, she is not making racial remarks she is telling her parents and everyone else who will listen that she is hungry. She runs to the kitchen and tugs on the door of the fridge screaming out “hungee! Hungee!! Hungee!!!” It progressively increases in volume and usually is in conjunction with her trying to force the door of the refrigerator open by tugging with her and arms and legs. She looks a bit like a miniature powerlifter trying to master a heavier weight in the clean and jerk. She even grunts.

In the interim my dreams are troubled and not limited to the evening hours. Every now and then they show up during the middle of the day. Unexpected and unwanted they enter my house with no regard for my feelings on the matter. Sometimes it is Mookie. He shows up, a plaintive expression planted across his brow and I am torn up as I am not sure what to do.

But the dream that kills me is the one in which I am drowning. Ok, I am not at the point of drowning but it is a real fear. I am treading water in the middle of the ocean. The sea is relatively calm and I can’t see anything but water. In every direction I look there is nothing but the ripples of the current, no ships, no land and no fish.

I know that I am alone, so very alone. But I am a fighter and I refuse to just give up so I keep treading water. Every now and then I feel things bump my legs. I don’t know what they are and I don’t really want to know as some secrets are best kept a secret.

At some point I grow incredibly tired, too tired and I stop kicking and I start to sink beneath the waves. I don’t get very far because I am consumed with an overwhelming fear of death and I shoot back to the surface where I resume my regimen of kicking. And then the frustration and anger sets in. I will not be Tantalus and so I begin swimming. I don’t know if I am going the right direction, all I know is that I am determined to make land.

Maybe I am a little more stressed out than I want to be or maybe I am more like the Gooch and have a little trouble living in the moment. Have to think about that one. In the meantime I am hungee. Back later.

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8 Comments

  1. Jack's Shack February 20, 2006 at 5:24 pm

    Hi Fitena,

    Thanks for stopping by.

    MCA,

    Hungee is a term used by some of the older members of the tribe. There was a bit of an “air” that some of them took towards Hungarian Jews and others that they didn’t think met their standards.

  2. MC Aryeh February 20, 2006 at 1:15 pm

    What kind of racial slur would hungee be? My only recurring dreams are the nightmare of becoming an accountant, which I ocassionally find myself waking from in a cold sweat, and a dream where I am running through a forest.

  3. Fitèna February 20, 2006 at 6:37 am

    lol! Dad posting about parental realities, that’s a refreshing change! lol! I loved this post which isn’t surprising; I love everything related to children!
    My niece is four years old, she deosn’t talk to me because she claims I wasn’t listening to her one day when she had been telling me something Important! Children!

    Fitèna

  4. Jack's Shack February 20, 2006 at 3:48 am

    DJ,

    Who knows.

    Gooch,

    That is a good observation and one that I suspect covers many children, certainly my own.

    Mirty,

    So do you actually get out of the car?

  5. Mirty February 20, 2006 at 1:43 am

    One of my repeating dreams is that I miss my exit off the highway and find myself almost immediately driving into water, usually the Pacific Ocean (I see the Golden Gate bridge above me). In the dream, I don’t actually drown, but I’m vaguely aware that I’ll never make it to where I was going and that it’s getting very cold and wet in the car.

  6. Gooch February 19, 2006 at 4:03 pm

    One thing I’ve notice about my 1 1/2 yr old son’s language development is he’ll learn a specific term and think it represents a more general concept. For example, my wife was all excited to tell me he had learned to ask for a “Cracker” (also not meant to be a racist remark). We quickly realized though, that anytime he said, “Cra-cra-cra-cracker” it just meant he was hungry, not that he wanted a cracker specifically

  7. Datingmaster, Jerusalem February 19, 2006 at 3:01 pm

    my rabbi and I discussed you last night-come over to find out what was said-also are u addicted to blogging-I do 3 hours a day and u?
    also would u agree to an interview similar to the one i did with sonia?

  8. Datingmaster, Jerusalem February 19, 2006 at 3:00 pm

    this is cute about your girl learning to speak _i have similar experiences
    the drowning dream is scary-we need you

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