The JackB

"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

Archives for June 2006

Eliyahu Asheri Deserved Better

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Eliyahu Asheri had a mother and father. Eliyahu Asheri had siblings. Eliyahu Asheri had every reason to look forward to a long and healthy life.

Sadly Eliyahu Asheri is not going to be able to enjoy that life. His family will never know what he could have become. His siblings will grow old without him and his parents will join the sad and solitary club of parents who have lost children.

There are no words that I can offer them to ease their sorrow. I cannot say that he died so that others could live. I cannot provide any sort of tribute or meaning that they can use to assuage their pain and for this I am sorry.

I don’t compare believe in comparing tragedies as it is a fools errand but I think that in this case there is a reasonable exception to be made.

In a suicide bombing one could say that there is a certain randomness to the act. The victims just happen to be there. The kidnapping is a bit different, at least it feels different to me.

It feels different because there is no doubt that the murderers took time to pick their victim, that they were more specific in who they hit. At least this is how it feels to me.

Earlier I blogged about how I felt that I had been wrong in my opinion about Gaza and disengagement. One of the commenters said:

“You weren’t wrong. It was the right step. The problem now lies with the current government. I supported disengagement and still do. I understood that being out of Gaza would give Israel carte blanche to retaliate in an appropriate manner. This kidnapping would NEVER have happened if Israel bombed the shit out of Gaza the first time kassams and ketushot. The Palestinians only understand force. The only diplomacy they understand is violence. Israel should have done what they are doing now months ago. It’s the current governments fault (Amir Peretz as Defense Minister?!?! PLEASE!) not disengagement. You think it would have gotten this far in Sharon was still PM? Never!”

I can appreciate this sentiment. Regardless of whether you loved or hated Sharon he brought a certain sense of security with him. You didn’t worry about appearing weak and inviting more attacks.

But the reality is that Sharon is not here and the situation is what it is. So I am hopeful that the government will look at the current situation and understand that they are at war and act appropriately.

The time has come to seek payment and to seek justice using all avenues. I am very sorry to have to write that, but in the end if you want security there is a time when you must use force to obtain it.

My condolences go out to the family of Eliyahu Asheri and the families of those who are going to give their lives so that others do not suffer the same fate as he.

Awkward moments abound in penis pump trial

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Sorry, this headline is too good not to bring to your attention:

Awkward moments abound in penis pump trial

“BRISTOW, Okla. – Serving on the jury in an indecent-exposure trial unfolding in this conservative Oklahoma town has been a giggle-inducing experience.

Former Judge Donald D. Thompson, a veteran of 23 years on the bench, is on trial on charges he used a penis pump on himself in the courtroom while sitting in judgment of others.

Over the past few days, the jurors have watched a defense attorney and a prosecutor pantomime masturbation. A doctor has lectured on the lengths the defendant was willing to go to enhance his sexual performance.

The white-handled sexual device sits before the jury box for hours at a time. Occasionally an attorney picks it up and squeezes the handle, demonstrating the “sh-sh” sound of air rushing through the contraption’s plastic tubing.

The jurors sometimes exchange awkward looks and break into nervous laughter when the testimony takes a lurid turn.

Thompson, 59, is charged with four counts of indecent exposure, each punishable by up to 10 years in prison. If convicted, he would also have to register as a sex offender, and his $7,489.91-a-month pension would be in jeopardy.

Thompson’s former court reporter, Lisa Foster, wiped away tears as she described tracing an unfamiliar “sh-sh” in the courtroom to her boss. She testified that between 2001 and 2003 she saw Thompson expose himself at least 15 times.

“I was really shocked and I was kind of scared because it was so bizarre,” said Foster.

She testified that during a trial in 2002, she heard the pump during the emotional testimony of a murdered toddler’s grandfather.

The grandfather “was getting real teary-eyed, and the judge was up there pumping on that pump,” she said. “It was sickening.”

The allegations came to light after a police officer who was in Thompson’s court heard pumping sounds and took photos of the device during a break in the proceedings.”

Ok, here is a question. How involved do you have to be for you not to notice that there is a cop taking pictures of you and your pump.

A Few Mumblings About Construction

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There is something to be said for remodeling your home on a day when it is over a 100 degrees and you cannot leave the house.

There is something to be said for remodeling your home on a day when it is over a 100 degrees and you cannot leave the house and you have two small children at home with you.

There is something to be said for remodeling your home on a day when it is over a 100 degrees and you cannot leave the house and you have two small children at home with you and one of those children is sick.

That something is ^%E^&U&^UI^$ &$$)@^@ )YIHG)JBOT^T$U*()U*$)$*UI#!!!!!!!!

What To Do With Old Record Albums

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If you are of a certain age there is a good chance that you have a fair amount of viny floating around your home.

I suspect that there are a quite a few visitors to the Shack who remember taking trips to the “Record Store” as well as remember the fun of playing a ’33’ at ’78.’

You might also remember that there was a time when scratching a record was not a good thing.

If you are like me you still have a ton of old record albums floating around that you are unwilling to part with. Perhaps you have tried to replace those old albums with the CD version. If you have any sort of collection this can be a costly endeavor.

Well now it appears there is another alternative that you can consider using.

THE LP-TO-CD RECORDER STEREO SYSTEM.
This combination recorder and stereo system allows you to preserve classic vinyl records by recording them to CDs. It takes a few simple steps to faithfully transfer an LP to a CD-R or CD-RW, and at any time during recording you can pause to select only certain songs, turn the album over, change albums, or make compilations. The system accommodates and plays 33s, 45s, and 78s, and has a built-in AM/FM stereo with analog tuner and single CD playback tray. Includes automatic/manual track increment control, record level indicator, record level control, backlit LCD screen, and remote control. Plugs into AC; UL listed. Remote runs on two AA batteries. 9″ H x 19″ W x 15″ D. (23 lbs.)

Please note that I have no vested interest in this product and cannot tell you if this is a good or bad product.

I Almost Feel Badly For The Burglar

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I meant to blog about this a while ago.

ST. LOUIS, MO — A burglar picked the wrong home to invade Thursday morning. The intruder had a knife, but the homeowner he encountered pulled out a gun and started shooting.

After breaking Willie Brown’s window, the burglar walked upstairs into a bedroom where Brown was sleeping. But after grabbing Brown’s wallet, the knife wielding thief received an unexpected and unwelcome surprise when Brown opened his eyes.

Brown said, “He was standing right at the door. He said, ‘I got a knife. Don’t move.’ I said, What? ‘I got a knife. Don’t move.’ Don’t move, huh? You got a knife? Okay, you got a knife. And I shot him.”

He said, “Whoops!”

“I said it’s too late for whoops now. I’m going to put a whoops to this 38.”