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"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

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Liveblogging Dinner With The Shmata Queen Part II

May 8, 2007 by Jack Steiner

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Part one can be found here.

SQ: Ah, the laptop at the table joins us again. Please don’t make me look foolish.
Me: I would never do that to you, especially when you are so much better at it than I am.

SQ: Must you always play these silly games.
Me: Is that a question or a statement.

SQ: What do you think?
Me: I think, therefore I am.

SQ: Sometimes you are a real pain in the ass.
Me: Only sometimes. Damn, I am losing my touch. Be happy you are out of reach.

SQ: Out of what?
Me: Socks. Out of socks. I said out of socks.

SQ: No you didn’t. What did you really say?
Me: I said that you make my heart skip a beat and my knees go weak, such a fair maiden.

SQ: I know that is not what you said, but I’ll take it.
Me: I know. All you do is take, take, take, take. When are you going to to give, give, give.

SQ: You are such a man.
Me: That’s why I wear the pants, not to mention that these wouldn’t look that good on you.

SQ: Hey, that is not nice.
Me: What is not nice.

SQ: You know what is not nice. Stop typing, I don’t want this in there.
Me: I don’t want this in there. Say, this is a family blog. Don’t go putting smut into my blog. You have your own. Oh, I am sorry, you have the one you abandoned.

SQ: Miriam is going to move in with him.
Me: Are we back on this again.

SQ: Yes. She is my sister and I love her.
Me: So do I, more than you know. Mua haha hah hah.

SQ: Go ahead and twist my words. That is not nice.
Me: Neither is cleveland but that didn’t stop you from living there.

SQ: I am getting tired of old jokes
Me: Ok, here is new one. LeBron James is going to win a championship for the cavs. Excuse me while I pause to wipe up the Coke coming out of my nose.

SQ: Can we have a serious conversation.
Me: Hmm… There you go again. Is that a question or a statement.

Folks, I’d write more but as you can see these discussions are really kind of tough. I am exhausted just thinking about this. Excuse me while I go search for some armor. Something tells me that I just might need it.

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