The Quest For Parental Validation

I wonder, do we ever reach an age at which we are no longer interested in parental validation. This is not to suggest that I have never gone against my parent’s wishes or suggestions. My life is a long list of going against the grain.

But nonetheless I’d be lying if I said that I prefer to receive my parent’s approval. I do.

I suppose that what makes me think of this is because as a father I see my own children seeking my own approval. They’re always asking me to watch them do something. “Abba, come see what I can do!” “Abba, look at this!” It really is nice. They make me smile.

I love my children. Sometimes it is tough to keep up with them. They have endless amounts of energy and I’d be lying if I said that sometimes it is hard to look at every little thing they do. So every now and then I slip out of father mode and back into the son.

And then I remember how it feels and I am rejuvenated. It is my wish that I always remember to give them the time they deserve even when I am tired. They deserve it.

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  1. Chaim G. June 28, 2007 at 4:16 pm


    Welcome to the sandwich generation.

    The sad part is to see supposed grown adults get bent out of shape when parental approval is withheld or when parental criticism is forthcoming.

    Fot Charedim this can be extended to Rebbi/RoashYeshiva/Rebitzen approval or dissapproval as well.

  2. Michael June 28, 2007 at 9:01 am

    Sometimes it is tough to keep up with them. They have endless amounts of energy

    I wonder if that can be tapped municipal uses. Can you imagine the energy potential of 1000 toddlers?

  3. Jane Poe (aka Deborah) June 28, 2007 at 7:39 am

    I *love* this …. this humanizes the parenting role … especially as we switch from adult children (integrating our role as both adult chilren & caretakers of our aging parents) to parents in our own right.

    Fascinating blend of experiences … xx, JP

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