She is a Butterfly

“Like the purest light in a darkened world
So much hope inside such a lovely girl
You should see her fly, it’s almost magical
It makes you wanna cry, she’s so beautiful”
She’s A Butterfly- Martina McBride (Click to hear the song)

This has become one of my favorite songs to listen to. It reminds me of my daughter. Not just because the lyrics do an excellent job of describing her but because every time she hears it she insists that I dance with her. And that is not something that I can refuse.

My dark haired beauty will turn three tomorrow. So today we gathered family and friends and celebrated. Yes, I survived a birthday party for a three-year-old. Not only that but I survived the shrieking that seems to be part and parcel of little girls playing together. If I had planned more carefully I would have remembered to bring earplugs. Instead I’ll suffer through a temporary case of tinnitus.

Her birthdays are always special to me. Not just because of her but because she was born two days after my father had a triple bypass. In many ways the days leading up to her birth were stressful and frightening. My father was exceptionally ill and the docs were suggesting that it was very likely that he might not make it. I remember the fear and the excitement I felt. If ever there was a time when my life felt like a soap opera that was it.

But now I have this incredible little girl who melts my heart. Long, dark, curls that are sort of like little ringlets dot her head. She loves to climb into my lap and listen to me read her stories and tell me about her day. She hasn’t any clue how much I love these moments. She hasn’t any sense of how much I love to dance with her, to take her in my arms and spin her around.

I know that time will change some of that so I am trying to absorb as much as I can now. I try to suck it all up and savor the moments we get. This special little girl melts me in a different sort of way than her brother.

The other day she asked me if I would be at her wedding. I don’t know what prompted the question, but I do know that for a moment I choked up a bit. I can’t quite imagine what she’ll look like as a grown woman, but I do know that one day some other guy will become her hero and I’ll just be dad. That’s ok, but it is not easy to take.

Fortunately I have many years to go before I have to worry about that, but still….

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