What To Do With Children’s Art Projects

I love the smell of markers in the morning. There is nothing better than starting my day with the smell of black, blue, purple, red, green and pink marker filling my nostrils. Even better is the pattern the wet markers make on my forehead.

You see, one of the many artists in the house loves her daddy so much she has to make a “beautiful picture” for him every day. Often times I am the lucky recipient of more than one. Sometimes the dear girl is so excited she can’t wait to show me.

On the odd occasion that I am granted a few minutes extra sleep she will wake me by sticking the picture on my face and shaking me, thus the smell of markers in the morning. What is a little headache in exchange for a smile that could power the sun. Ok, the few times that she has managed to spread the markers onto the comforter are a bit less thrilling, but it is hard to be angry when she is so happy.

As I mentioned earlier she is not the only artist in the house. She has an older brother who really enjoys art projects too. Between those they do at home and those generated by school we’re running into a small issue regarding what to do with them.

There simply isn’t space to hang all of the pictures. There is not enough room to place the various other items on shelves. Over time we have acquired a number of clear plastic bins in which we have stored many of the better projects, but that has its own issues as well. These kids are still young. At the current rate in less than five years I’ll have more than 2,983,092,092 art projects to consider what do with.

Some of you are probably wondering why we don’t surreptitiously dispose of some these items. The answer is that when possible we do, but these kids have memories that would shame an elephant. It is not unusual for them to ask what happened to such and such and so and so. I don’t like lying to them, but I don’t really want to say that I didn’t think that beautiful picture was beautiful enough to save.

I sometimes consider carrying vast amounts of candy in my pocket for moments like that. “What did you say about a picture? Hmm…eat this and let me try and remember.”

Did I ever mention that I used to consider becoming a kid’s dentist. After each visit I was going to give them a toy filled with sugar. And for the older kids I’d provide skateboards and roller blades with specific instructions to ride down a hill without pads.

Stop scowling, I am allowed to make a living. And you, with the funny looking Rav4, you may think that you’re environmentally conscious but your gas money still supports the terrorists who want to kill us. That ought to shut you up for a moment.

Sorry, didn’t mean to get feisty but I just got hit in the head by the beautiful pencil holder. And now if you’ll excuse me I am off to find an ice pack for my head.

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