The JackB

"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

Archives for February 2009

The Bungee Cord Breaks

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Maybe I’ll pass on the Bungee Jumping.

AMBOY, Wash. — A day of bungee jumping with friends from work came to a sudden stop when the cord broke and a man dropped into Canyon Creek northeast of Yacolt, Wash. Thursday.
Mark Afforde said the cord broke shortly after he’d hit the lowest point of the jump from an estimated 400-foot high bridge — about 25 feet from the surface. Paramedics from North Country Medical said that probably saved his life as he was relatively close to the creek when the cord snapped.

Afforde, 49, said he heard the bungee cord snap and he felt the impact as he went underwater. Then, he realized he was still alive and okay and made his way to the side of the creek.
“I am incredibly fortunate. Not only to be with the people I’m with, but to be here. Had it been a different situation, I probably wouldn’t be here,” Afforde told KGW in the exclusive interview.
Despite the scare, Afforde said he would bungee jump again.

The Butt Doctor

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The big guy I call “Little Jack” continues to serve as a primary source of blog fodder. At eight he is finally beginning to notice that some of his friends live in bigger houses or have more toys than he does.

Earlier today he asked me if I knew that some of the other fathers are doctors. I told him that I was and asked why he wanted to know. He told me that one of his friends said that it was better to be a doctor because they got more gold.

I laughed and told him that if he wanted to find gold all he needed to do was take a trip to Ireland to talk to a few leprechauns. He recognized the wink in my eye and told me that he was serious. I told him that I was serious and explained made a point to make sure that he understood what leprechauns were.

Then I took a moment to talk to him about what doctors do. We spent a few moments discussing it and I explained that were specialties. So he asked me to name a few of them. I told him about cardiologists, pulmonologists and surgeons.

Since he is eight he went straight for his favorite topic, anatomy and asked me if there were butt and penis doctors. I looked him straight in the eye and said that there were. He paused and then told me that he was glad that I wasn’t a butt doctor.

I told him that I agreed with him. With a serious look on his face he explained that he thought that it would literally stink and wanted to know if the butt doctors wore nose plugs.

A few minutes later he looked at me and half muttered, half whispered something about a girl’s doctor. I told him he should speak up and ask me his question. So he said that he wanted to know if girls had special doctors for their private parts. I told him that they did.

He looked at me and asked if they had to be other girls. I told him that they didn’t and he kind of screwed up his face and asked me what boy would want to stare at naked girls all day. I said Ron Jeremy and then explained that one day he might volunteer for the job.

Hang on, hang on. Before you get huffy, I didn’t say anything of the sort. I didn’t mention Ron Jeremy. And again I restrained myself from making a crack about spelunking, I rather enjoy that word. It and defenestrate just make me smile. Don’t know why, but I like them.

For those who are curious I made a point to use the proper titles for the various doctors, but something tells me that his description, the “Butt Doctor” hasn’t made its last visit to the house.

Mammoth Found in Los Angeles

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I thought that this was pretty cool. Think that I might have to take a walk on down to the George C. Page museum. Been a while since I got to see the tar pits.

Now, at least 10,000 years later, visitors in Los Angeles, California, can see the remains of “Zed,” a Columbian mammoth whose nearly intact skeleton is part of what is being described as a key find by archaeologists at Los Angeles’ George C. Page Museum.

Zed was discovered at a construction site in the heart of Los Angeles. An earth mover helping to build an underground parking garage near the L.A. County Museum of Art uncovered the mammoth’s skull, according to project director Christopher Shaw.

“The skull was hit and shaved off … by a scraper,” Shaw told CNN Thursday. “We don’t know just how smashed up it is, but it’s fairly intact because it’s a huge jacket we put it around.”

The mammoth’s fossil was among 16 deposits at the site that archaeologists wrapped, along with the surrounding dirt, in plaster jackets, creating 23 boxes weighing between 5 and 53 tons that were then lifted out intact.

The construction was being monitored by an archaeological consulting firm because the site is so close to the La Brea tar pits — an archeological site that has yielded 100 million bones belonging to 300 species of mammals and birds.

Construction on the parking garage began in 2006, but it took two more years for all the recovered materials to be handed over to researchers at the Page Museum, who began analyzing the various fossils in June, Shaw said.

“It’s very exciting for us because each one of these … could be different ages in the past 10,000 to 45,000 years,” Shaw said.

John Harris, the head curator of the Page Museum, publicly announced the finding of “a whole new treasure trove of fossils” on Wednesday. He described it as “the most important discovery” for the museum “of the last 90 years.”

Shaw said the announcement was made to “create interest” in the museum’s discovery.
Among the most interesting items is likely to be Zed, who is believed to have died in his late 40s. Mammoths are thought to have had an average lifespan of about 60 years.

Not all of Zed’s remains have been cleaned off and analyzed.

“Right now we have opened the plaster jacket of four sections that were excavated, including vertebrae and ribs and pelvis, one tusk and the lower jaw,” Shaw said. “It will take another six to 12 months to open everything.”

Shaw said both of Zed’s tusks were found intact, which is very rare.

“Previously, we’ve found mammoths but the tusk material was very poorly preserved,” Shaw said. “It’s very exciting to us to have these two complete, beautifully preserved tusks.”