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The JackB

"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

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Archives for April 2009

Do Men Have Feelings

April 29, 2009 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

Age is a funny thing. Until recently most of my experience with it had been waiting to get older. There were a million things that I wanted to do, but I wasn’t old enough. Slowly but surely I hit those marks and gained the ability to do whatever it was that I wanted to at that point in time.

But until recently I never really felt old or felt the pressure that age can bring with it. Maybe it is all in my head, but with the end of my thirties rapidly approaching I no longer feel like I have eternity to fall back upon. Now I feel the weight of time and it makes me wonder.

You can blame some of this upon certain life experiences. Almost all of my friends are married, most for quite some time. Virtually all of us have children. And now we have reached that time when a number of the marriages are ending. As these relationships end or evolve I have noticed that some conversations that I had thought had been left in the past have resurfaced.

Four years I wrote a short post called Do Men Have Emotions? It wasn’t anything special, but it is one that comes up in keyword searches on a regular basis. It is suddenly relevant to me again because lately the discussions about whether men have feelings have become more prevalent, and not just among the women, but the men.

I suppose that you can attribute the increased discussion to age and maturity. The boys don’t really have that need to be tough, at least not among each other. Now there is far more support for sharing our tales with each other. It is far easier to talk about the girl that broke your heart in the past or the present as the case may be.

The other thing that I have found to be sort of funny is that I have heard a number of women complain about this show of emotion from the men. The cynic in me would accuse them of double standards. You want men to talk about their feelings, but when they do you complain that they are less manly. It is a catch-22 that not even Major Major could get out of.

I am not a social worker. I am not a therapist or some sort of shrink whose job it is to make sense of all this. That is not what I do. Men are men, women are women and we can only do what we can to try and figure it all out.

But I can guarantee that there will be a few women who end up on this post and ask for answers. All I can tell you is that we do have feelings. We fall in love and our happy. Relationships end and our hearts break. We are happy, we are sad and everything in between. We’re humans just like you.

The biggest difference is that we’re logical and you aren’t. 😉 And now if you’ll excuse me I am going to employ the duck and cover technique while I sneak out of here.

Filed Under: Love, Random Thoughts, Relationships

Recent Posts

April 28, 2009 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

If you haven’t been around here is a list of posts you might have missed:

How To Get More Readers For Your Blog
More Links That Caught My Eye
The Science Behind Beer Goggling
365 Days of Face Painting
Facebook and Bad Photos
Comment Policy: Free Advertising
Israeli Security Repels Pirates
Haveil Havalim #214 – The Radiant Ziv edition
Jack and Dr. Seuss
Harry Chapin and Jack
Indian Women Say No Toilet, No Wedding
Hard Rock Bug Repellent
Why NFL Draft Picks Fail
Bridge over Troubled Water- Good Version
The Somalian Pirates Successful Business Model

Filed Under: Shack Roundup

How To Get More Readers For Your Blog

April 28, 2009 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

The two most common questions bloggers ask about blogging are how to get more readers and how encourage them to leave more comments. It is not surprising. It is always nice to see that people appreciate your work.

Easy Versus Hard
Easy Versus Hard

I have a simple formula that I try to follow that has proven to be successful.

Blog with passion and blog with joy. Blog with energy.

Many experts recommend that you pick a topic and focus upon that. That is solid advice. Writing about what you know is important, but so is writing about something you enjoy. It will pay dividends. You’ll find it easier to pay attention to details and to craft something that is more interesting.

Write in your natural voice. Blogging is interactive, so be conversational when you can. But don’t shy away from being descriptive. Your posts should tell a story, build a tapestry of images and ideas.

Pay attention to the titles of your posts. New readers aren’t always aware that you are the next Hemingway so you need to do something to draw them in.

Read other blogs and comment on them. If your blog is focused on a particular topic go out and find like minded bloggers. Spend some time on their blogs and comment there.

A word of advice about this. Try to leave comments that make it clear that you read the post. If you are new to a blog and you leave comments like “good post” it may be flagged as comment spam.

Develop posts that are interactive in nature. Ask your readers questions that will encourage them to engage with you. For example write a post in which you ask your readers to name their three favorite blogs. Then go there and leave a comment saying that blogger XYZ sent you.

Relationships are important. Cultivate them. They are just as important in the blogosphere as they are outside of it. There may come a time when you have to take a break from blogging. If you don’t want to lose momentum you can ask other bloggers to serve as a guest blogger on your blog.

Most of the time they’ll let their readers know that they are pinch hitting elsewhere and you just might find yourself with some new readers.

And don’t forget that it works the other way too. If you have the opportunity to be a guest blogger take it. It is an excellent way to expose yourself and your blog to a brand new audience.

But most of all, just have fun. I may be biased, but the best and most enjoyable blogs are those that Blog with passion and blog with joy. Blog with energy.

What do you think?

Filed Under: Blogging

More Links That Caught My Eye

April 28, 2009 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

Why Google Wants You to Google Yourself– The assault on Facebook begins.
The Ten Greatest Pontiacs-1978 Smokey & The Bandit takes the cake.
50 Most Heartbreaking Songs of All Time
Vatican planned to move to Portugal if Nazis captured wartime Pope
Abbas won’t recognize Israel as a Jewish state– No problem, Hamas doesn’t recognize him as having any authority.

Filed Under: Uncategorized

The Science Behind Beer Goggling

April 28, 2009 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

Time Magazine has an interesting story called Does Beer (Goggling) Affect Whom We Find Attractive?

The new study, set to be published in June in the 100th issue of the British Journal of Psychology, examined how alcohol plays into all these murky attractions to youth. The vast majority of men don’t act on their potentially inappropriate, or criminal, impulses, but can those who do blame the booze?

The study’s authors, Egan and Cordan, asked their 120 drinking and 120 sober participants to rate the attractiveness of 15-year-old girls versus 19-year-old girls shown in photographs. The study participants were evenly divided between men and women. For ethical and legal reasons, the photos were actually altered images of 17-year-old students from McMaster University in Ontario; they had given permission for their likenesses to be used. Researchers digitally manipulated the pictures to make the students’ craniofacial features look like those of typical 15-year-olds or those of 19-year-olds. The doctored pictures were then shown in random order to participants recruited in bars, airport lounges, cafes and other natural settings.

On average, the participants found the “15-year-olds” slightly more attractive than the “19-year-olds,” which reconfirms our inclination toward neoteny. Both men and women found the more youthful images of girls to be a bit more attractive than the older ones.

Surprisingly, drinking had little impact on the results.

Filed Under: Relationships, Science

365 Days of Face Painting

April 28, 2009 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

Wacky artist paints his face for a full year.

Filed Under: Caught My Eye

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