I Should Have Slept With Her…. Again


Theft (Photo credit: m.aquila)

Dear content thief,

I have been to your blog several times to try and find contact information so that I could ask you to stop stealing my words. You don’t have an email address and you don’t publish my comments so I am going to try Dino’s suggestion and use colorful language and see what happens.

I’d like to unleash the minions and groupies upon you but that would be bullying and I don’t believe that bloggers should bully others. On the other hand I’d like to take your lying, thieving ass and shove a rusty metal pole up it just to see if that would help adjust your attitude. Perhaps we could add to the fun and games by playing Pin the tale on the motherfucker who steals content. Ok, I am bored with you so I am going to move on to other topics.

Was That Headline Linkbait?

The answer my friends is yes it is. It is designed to catch your eye and make you point, click and comment your way over here. That reminds me that I need to write a post about why comments are a poor metric to use for measuring influence on a blog. I suppose that I should mention that it is tied into a discussion I had at Mark Schafer’s blog post about Why Klout Matters.

That headline is going to create issues for some of my fellow tribesmen. Some of them won’t bother to read this post and will simply react and that my friends is a big mistake. I know, some of you will bring up the old discussion about the value of headlines and say that I have created my own issue. You’ll tell me that since people are exceptionally busy we need to cater to their short attention spans. I don’t do it like it that. I don’t work that way. I won’t write short blog posts or try to focus on content that makes people want to comment.

It takes the fun out of this for me and that is something that I refuse to do. The people that come here on a regular basis, my community, they understand that feeling is a part of my writing. I march to the beat of my own drummer and he has no rhythm. It doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t love to be the most popular blogger or to get ten thousand comments on each post. If some of those things happened it would be easier to monetize this and make it more likely that the blog could become my full time job.

What Is Real And What Isn’t

That is a question that many people ask. They read stories like A Detour, August, and One Slightly Used Pump and wonder about the back story. You write me and ask me to tell you what happened to the Flying Clown and I give you an answer that sounds plausible but doesn’t say much of anything. Is it fair to that? I don’t know and in spite of appearances I don’t think much about it. 1974 is real and so is Five Minutes.

Ok, ok, I’ll provide some more details here and we’ll see if that helps explain things. Many years ago I started writing fiction on my old blog and decided that I would try to turn it into a story. The easiest way for me to do that was to take pieces of life and integrate them with pieces of fiction. The net result is that some of what you read is based upon experiences that I have had and or stories that my friends have told me.

The goal has always been to blur things so that no one could ever say that the story is solely about them. I think that to a large extent I have been successful. Since it is a story about people it is easy for others to relate to. Most of us have been in love and had our hearts broken. We have lived our dreams and lived nightmares. Or if we haven’t we have read or watched the stories so the ones that I write are easy for people to relate to.

Ok, it is approaching 1 am and I need to get my lazy butt in bed. But before I go I think it is time to share a handful of videos with you. In no particular order:

Time will tell whether I am the write motherfucker for this job or not. I don’t know how many of you will read this far, but I have a challenge for those who do. Try to write at least one post that makes you cry. Try to write at least one post that makes you feel like your heart has been torn out of your chest.

Or alternatively write about something that infuriates you. Write about something that makes you so angry you spit blood. That sort of fire is good for your writing and good for your readers. Expose yourself and see what happens. This blogosphere is an amazing place.

(Visited 798 times, 1 visits today)


  1. Sean S January 20, 2012 at 7:11 pm

    damn it! you totally got me with the headline…

  2. adamsok September 20, 2011 at 5:49 pm

    Ha Jack, you got me! Do you have the rusty pole video as well? Now that might go comment viral!

  3. janetcallaway September 18, 2011 at 3:23 pm

    Jack, aloha. Loved your headline and looked forward to reading your masterful weaving. What I wonder about content thieves, Jack, is do they truly think they will get away with it? That no one will ever know? The online world is big and small at the same time. Even had the CT had contact info, not likely you would have received a response. And, probably just as well you could not rant privately to them because you would likely find your words published and taken out of context. That being said, if you need us to go over and say “Gee, I remember reading this piece on Jack’s blog,” just say the word and we’ll be there.

    Actually, I happened to be involved in the “incident” which Adrienne referenced and I was stunned, shocked and appalled by what transpired. Fortunately, Adrienne and I had several fb message conversations which I like to think helped her vent. Also, Carolyn and Stacey jumped in to support her. Had she written publicly what we were able to say privately, I think the repercussions from the individual who made the comments might still be resounding.

    Jack, you are so right in the difference it makes when the emotion comes flooding forth as you write. What a feeling.

    Needless to say, I did read the entire post, as I always do with yours. Please let me know if you are calling us out in force to comment on the CT’s blog. While I realize the CT will not publish our comments either, perhaps the CT will get the message.

    Best wishes for a terrific next week, Jack. Until later, aloha. Janet

    • TheJackB September 18, 2011 at 11:12 pm

      @janetcallaway I think it depends upon the ‘person.’ I don’t think that the spam blogs worry about any of it. They just try to push as much traffic through them as possible.

      I appreciate the support but I am not going to send them any readers. I prefer to limit the amount of attention they receive.

      But what I want to highlight is that social media is about people and when I say that I appreciate your support it is because I do. My readers will always see posts/comments in which I express my love for writing but I don’t say enough about the people.

      The friends that I have made and connections that I have built make me smile. Social media continues to introduce me to incredible people and I am grateful for you and all of the others.

      Those who are new here will read your comment and recognize that there are people who look out for others and that is something that is worth pursuing.

  4. TheJackB September 17, 2011 at 11:12 am

    @markwschaefer Hi Mark. Welcome to the blog, it is good to see you here. Look forward to seeing you again. Hope you are having a great weekend.

  5. markwschaefer September 17, 2011 at 10:37 am

    Nice. Yes, I even read it.

  6. TheJackB September 16, 2011 at 4:54 pm

    @AdrienneSmith It sounds like they don’t know you at all. Whenever I am angry I try to remind myself that the words we type here live forever. It is a lesson worth remembering because if you say something you regret it can linger for a long time.

    I know because I have done it.

    Anyhoo, we are all that work in progress- it is part of what makes us human.

  7. AdrienneSmith September 16, 2011 at 12:06 pm

    Yep Jack, clever headline and I read the WHOLE post! But your first paragraph, I was feeling that for sure but about something else. Someone wrote something about me and they weren’t very nice. Can you believe they said I’m not social? The nerve so writing that post when you’re angry, I actually had to take some steps back before I did something I would regret. I don’t want to be that person.

    So first off, sorry some jerk did that to you so I say go get um. Second, I get the headline thing. We’ve all been told to do that ourselves. When and if I do throw a good one out there, I do try to write a topic around it which is why you probably don’t see a lot of killer headlines over there these day! Hey, I’m a work in progress remember!

    Always enjoy your rants and thoughts on subjects. Either way, I’ll keep coming back for more Jack.

  8. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 11:18 pm

    @NinaBadzin Hi Nina. You aren’t without resources for dealing with content theft. There are things that you can do many of which have been listed in the comments. It depends on who/what grabbed your content and where it is.

    Zack’s suggestion to run a whois search is a good idea. It never hurts to try and identify who is hosting the site that has it. Sometimes a simple email to them will work.

  9. NinaBadzin September 14, 2011 at 5:57 pm

    Okay, so I didn’t really follow what’s going on here. Feel like I’m missing something. BUT–did understand the beginning. Have you really had content stolen? I have recently (a guest post I had on Writer Unboxed). Doesn’t seem there’s much I can do about it. 🙁

  10. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 4:16 pm

    @Erin F. When I had complete anonymity I was much more open about my thoughts and feelings. Slowly over time I have tempered that and changed my approach. I have found boundaries in blogging.

    But I understand what you are saying- some things aren’t shared with anyone or at best a small and select group.

  11. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 4:14 pm

    @bdorman264 Ah, so you expected to see a guy with four days growth, dark circles under his eyes surrounded by empty pizza boxes and beer bottles. Thank god for hefty bags and Gillette razors. 😉

    It was indeed a pleasure. Look forward to do it again.

  12. Erin F. September 14, 2011 at 4:10 pm

    @TheJackB I suppose it could be frustrating for some people. It usually isn’t for me, but that’s because I don’t often like the results of the writing I do when I’m angry or sad. I suppose I’m a little self-protective, too. I don’t necessarily like to share what I’m feeling unless it’s with someone I trust completely, and, even then, it’s hard for me.

  13. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 3:53 pm

    @zjrosenberg It is a wordpress.com site.

  14. zjrosenberg September 14, 2011 at 3:11 pm

    Hey have you tried doing a WHOIS on the domain and seeing who owns it? I’m a little late to the conversation here but worth a shot.

  15. Chris_Buckley September 14, 2011 at 3:10 pm

    @TheJackB Thanks. Hmmm… “Crockplogger”?

  16. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 3:08 pm

    @Chris_Buckley Chris, I like your posts and I understand why you need time. Your posts are packed full of so much information, thought and emotion it takes time to digest. You are like the crockpot blogger.

  17. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 3:05 pm

    @NewYorkDad I could tell you who I slept with. I could write an entire post that painted an amazing picture without providing any real details. But…

    @DaddyFiles is a crazy bostonian but that is really something to be blamed on the water.

  18. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 3:00 pm

    @JoeDeGiorgio Hi Joe. A fork in the eye? No wonder you wear those sunglasses. 😉

    A blog without feeling is a bit like eating bad pizza- tastes a lot like cardboard.

  19. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 2:21 pm

    @Erin F. Some of the posts that have been stolen have been used to populate spam blogs so I don’t think that they care about the quality, just the content. Damn SEO stuff. But every now and then I come across something that might fall into a different category.

    If my blog was focused solely upon business I would be more concerned about the topic and content than I am now. But since it is not I have some latitude that others don’t.

    I can appreciate how it might be harder for you and others to write when upset about something. It would probably be frustrating.

  20. bdorman264 September 14, 2011 at 1:42 pm

    Even though we ain’t facin’ West, I’ll still greet all of our guests……….oy!

    So that’s what linkbait looks like? Plus, I need you to get more colorful because if I’m going to steal your stuff people will think I’m getting really edgy now; they’ll say ‘man, that guy is growing’……..if you feel compelled to send me e-mails, it is BR549……oh wait, that’s my phone number………..

    Very good to see you today sir, but not what I expected. But certainly not in a bad way; you were way too normal, I thought you were going to have that bad apartment, crusty look going on………….just sayin’….

    So real and true are not synonymous; just let me know when I’m supposed to be paying attention.

    Quite the pleasure, Mazel Tov my friend.

  21. bdorman264 September 14, 2011 at 1:28 pm

    @TheJackB Even though you saw the tie, I’m a Social Distortion kind of guy…..just sayin’……….

  22. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 1:15 pm

    @poddys Thank you for the tip. It sounds like a very interesting plugin and well worth checking out. In the past I have “rescued” my work by having the hosting company and or platform owner kill the offending blog and you are right- it is quite rewarding.

  23. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 1:14 pm

    @Hajra Hi Hajra. I liked @NancyD68 post because I relate to it. I am biased because Nancy and I have similar methods for blogging but overall I think that it is an important message.

    Some people could do much more to push and promote their message by giving their posts something meaty for the reader to latch on to.

  24. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 1:12 pm

    @SocialMediaDDS Hi Claudia. It was a pleasure hanging out with you bdorman264 lorigosselin and pasmithjr today.

    I am guessing that you are referring to Rita Coolidge and Kris, but that is just a guess.

    As a collector of moments in time I do have a few that I could have tied into the headline but some people might accuse me of engaging in kiss and tell. But since I removed all filters from mouth and brain you never know if those tales will be told.

    To a large extent I am a what you see is you get kind of person. Those who really know me will tell you that it is not hard to know what I am feeling. Since I use the blog to vent some of this gets exaggerated a bit.

    I also use the blog as a writing sandbox. Since I want to turn the stories in my head into books and screenplays I work hard to write stories here that people enjoy and can relate to. The easiest way is to take bits and pieces of life and share that.

    I try to label those items as being part of Fragments of Fiction.

    The challenge is a response that I wrote to a series of blog posts that I have read recently that were empty and hollow. Sometimes there is a reason to write like that and I understand. Some topics don’t need, require or deserve passion- but outside of those….

  25. Chris_Buckley September 14, 2011 at 12:04 pm

    Lacking a lot of the backstory here, myself, but it was a clever snare. 🙂

    That said, I think the challenge to blogging is balancing the emotion you call for with the inherent need for quick-turn content. That’s largely why I can’t be much more productive than a post a month, myself. I find content of such richness requires a) enough ingredients and b) time in the stew pot so that the disparate flavors can interact and generate complexity.

  26. NewYorkDad September 14, 2011 at 11:56 am

    OK. C’mon Jack. Who is she? I read the whole damn post and all the other links including the comments (and your repartee with that lunatic Boston fan of @DaddyFiles) and I still don’t know who it is you slept with… again. I want my money back, but I’ll settle for a higher Klout score 😉

  27. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 10:58 am

    @Robert Terson Hi Robert. I suppose that you are right and there is something to it. But if people make money off of my work I tend to prefer that I am foremost among them. 🙂

  28. TheJackB September 14, 2011 at 10:48 am

    @StartYourNovel Pin the tail on the motherfucker is one hell of a game, but it hurts like a bitch to play it.

    I am obviously not thrilled by it, but it happens. I am more bothered by those who understand that it is wrong than those who don’t recognize that there are limits to how much you can copy and paste.

    Most of the time the thieves find new targets and go elsewhere so I am just trying to wait them out.

  29. JoeDeGiorgio September 14, 2011 at 10:42 am

    I’ve written a few posts that have triggered the tear ducts a bit. I’ve got another coming up. I’m with you. If a blog doesn’t display some feeling within the words, it’s pretty much useless. If I see another post about maximizing your Twitter use, social media tips, or 18 ways to be a better blogger, I may just stick a fork in my eye.

    Thanks for the music as well. I broke out the Bruce CD over this past weekend, and it’s still awesome ten years later….

  30. Erin F. September 14, 2011 at 8:55 am

    Where to begin. Hmm. Yes, I was enticed by the title and the snippet. It was such a catchy one that it drew my attention away from whatever it was that I was getting ready to do.

    Stealing another person’s words? Ouch. That never makes me happy. It hasn’t happened to me, at least not that I know. I suppose you could try to view the theft as a compliment, but I would never suggest that. I would be equally angry, which is one of the reasons that I don’t self-publish my poetry online. I have several other reasons for making that choice, but that’s neither here nor there.

    The challenges? I avoid the posts that make me cry. They don’t work well on a blog that’s supposed to be the voice of my company. I also struggle to write when I’m in tears, so I just don’t write about the thing that’s upsetting me until a later date. Writing about things that infuriate me is dangerous. I typically do so when I find a blog post that angers me. I don’t usually write when the problem is related to a client or something like that unless I can write the post without divulging details that would reveal who the person is.

    I didn’t actually listen to the songs despite my love for music, because, well, I need to get back to work.

  31. poddys September 14, 2011 at 6:37 am

    When I find that my work is stolen, I use a browser plugin called WOT (Web Of Trust) and flag the site, also leaving a comment as to why. WOT warns you if you are about to visit a site that is dubious – content, virus, spam, scams etc.

    WOT also allows you to see who owns the site and who hosts it. Sometimes it’s not enough to try and contact the owner, just make a complaint to the hosting company and with luck they might just pull the plug on it. You need to keep plenty of evidence on what you are doing though before the host will comply, but it’s satisfying when they do.

  32. Hajra September 14, 2011 at 6:26 am

    And I just read @NancyD68 post about feeling and blogging! This makes it so apt! I still haven’t written a post which makes me cry…not that extreme yet but yes, I do write about things I feel.. things that linger in my mind for a long time and I feel need expression!

  33. SocialMediaDDS September 14, 2011 at 5:06 am

    Hmmmm….where to begin. Music first…music is always first for me. Kris Kristofferson’s Loving Her Was Easier gets my top vote. I’m a sap and I’m a folk guitar player so it isn’t hard to figure out why that’s my pick. Remember Kris and Rita? I think you’re too young.

    Headlines next…you are right…the headline was enticing but, since I am a regular here, I would have visited even if the title was “Another Boring Headline” That being said, I’m sure you could come up with a captivating story that speaks to the headline that you DID use today….I’ll wait…

    Stealing your content next…it is audacious…it is wrong…it is unconscionable…that being said….I rather agree with @Robert Terson and suggest that in this uncontrolled internet blogosphere, maybe you should try to look at it differently instead of wasting your precious energy and talent on anger…maybe if you embrace (I know…too much meditation) the possibility of content stealing as flattery, it would feel less violating….maybe…

    Last…what is real and what isn’t….as I am getting to “know” you on your blog and in the comment world, I see that you live the what is real and what isn’t and it generates mystery, intrigue and a following. With you, nothing is as it seems and yet…it is. Your name, you characters, your story are all fictionally real. It keeps people coming back hoping to get more of a glimpse of you…hoping you will slip and some light will be shed. Remember the old game show To Tell the Truth?(you’re too young again) …will the real JackB please stand up.

    That’s all. Oh. Not quite. Your challenge. The two blogs I focus on right now are related to my professional “life” and so, writing a post that makes me cry (hey…wait a minute…you don’t cry!!) while easy for me, is not appropriate. Neither is one that has me lashing out (I’m not a lasher-outer though so…) I have my parkridgedds.tumblr.com place that maybe I should use to accept your challenge. So, stay tuned…


  34. Robert Terson September 14, 2011 at 4:08 am

    You probably don’t want to hear this, Jack, but by stealing your work, the thief is complementing you, letting you and the world know how much he values your creations. Coco Chanel said, “Imitation is the highest form of flattery”; that said, I’d like to unleash on the M———–, too!

  35. StartYourNovel September 14, 2011 at 3:06 am

    “Pin the tail on the motherfucker” sounds like an awesome game.

    I’m sorry that there’s someone out there stealing your words, Jack. It sucks that there are such immature people out there. Let’s hope the ‘colorful language’ tactic works.

    I’ve had my work appropriated on Flickr and it always sucks. I know how it feels. Even when the thief remains obscure. They crossed a line anyhow. That smarts.

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