We Opened Pandora’s Box
Sometimes I forget that storms follow where I walk and that I am capable of creating chaos and wreaking havoc with limited effort. Ok, that is a bit of an exaggeration but not as much as I would like it to be.
When we made the decision to leave private school for the public world it was with the hope that we would be accepted to a particular place. There was one school that ranked above the rest and it was where I focused my energy.
There was no doubt in my mind that it wasn’t the only option and that other good schools existed but I pursued it with somewhat singular vision. Enrollment was guaranteed to those who lived in the neighborhood and a lottery was available for those who did not.
Long story short we did not live in the magic area and pursued admission via the lottery. It didn’t work out and the children were placed on wait list. Daughter ended up at a great elementary school and loves it. I am quite pleased to see how happy she is in school and love hearing the stories she tells about her teacher and all the new friends she has made.
The prodigal son was a slightly different story. He started middle school with more trepidation than I liked and I found myself wondering if I was responsible for making him fearful.
Change is Frightening
Much discussion led to the conclusion that some of his discomfort came from fear of the unknown and some from the mouths of friends who filled his head with horror. Many thanks to these children who have never attended public school and were merely parroting parental discharge.
Got the big guy to accept that they did not know what they were talking about and watched him ease into the new joint with some of the same joy we all exhibit in stepping into cold water. Slowly but surely he has become more comfortable and I have been proud to see his progress.
Early Monday morning I received a telephone call letting me know that a space has opened up at the school we originally wanted him to attend. Ran over to the school to get enrollment papers and had a brief talk with my son about this.
He is not completely sure he wants to change and I am torn.
Whose Decision Is It?
In reality he is still young enough not to have a “real” vote in where he goes to school. He is welcome to give his opinion but we retain veto power.
This should be easy. The decision to move him over to the school that had been headlining our desire shouldn’t be difficult. We are only one week in to the school year which means he really won’t be behind the other students.
Except it is not easy and I am surprised by how much harder it is than expected.
He has done much better acclimating at the current school and has made some friends. Part of me wonders if I shouldn’t respect these things and let him continue. It is not a bad school but it wasn’t the first choice.
Now I am staring at a piece of paper trying to figure out if one is truly better than the other. Staring and wondering which has the advantage and which will give him more opportunity.
The young master had trouble going to sleep tonight. He wrestled over this and listening to his questions/comments I could tell he was trying to please me. That is not what I want.
I don’t want him to decide to do this because he thinks it will make me happy. I want it to happen because he sees opportunity. Of course it is possibleÂ that he won’t want to change and I will insist because I think it is best.
It is a parent’s prerogative, but none of this is as easy as saying yes or no. The plan had been to start at the new school tomorrow but I may push it back a day to give everyone a littleÂ more time to think.
Wednesday will be the drop dead date. Oy, sometimes this parenting thing is just nuts.