• Skip to main content
  • Skip to secondary navigation
  • Skip to footer

The JackB

"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

  • About Jack
    • Other Places You Can Find Me
  • Contact Me
    • Disclosure
  • About Jack
    • Other Places You Can Find Me
  • Contact Me
    • Disclosure

Archives for January 2013

The Evolution Of Change

January 24, 2013 by Jack Steiner 6 Comments

Yosemite Wilderness & Koip Crest
California will always be home.

I don’t know if someone has already written about the evolution of change. Can’t say if I came up with it on my own or if I saw it somewhere and I am not interested in “googling” it which is exactly why I just did what I said I wasn’t interested in doing.

I “Googled” the damn thing because I don’t want to inadvertently plagiarize someone else, don’t want to pretend I came up with it because sometimes we aren’t as creative, original or clever as we would like to be.

When you are an obnoxious old blogger like me you look around the damn blogopshere and see people writing about stuff like they just discovered it. After a while you realize there is a good chance you didn’t and then you have to decide whether it matters or not.

Reminds me of a time many years ago when I started posting about blogapathy, blogrisma and blog envy. Got a few laughs and some nice comments and then came some emails from people who tried to lay claim to being the inventor or originator of certain things.

And that my friends is why I talk about being the “Original Dad Blogger” because I have been doing this longer than most and it doesn’t matter if I haven’t headlined BlogHer, Blogworld or any of other social media conferences.

Take your “superior marketing skills” and smoke them because I started before most and will keep going long after the shine wears off because I love writing, but that is not what this post is about.

Terence Mann: Ray. Ray. Listen to me, Ray. Listen to me. There is something out there, Ray, and if I have the courage to go through with this, what a story it’ll make: “Shoeless Joe Jackson Comes to Iowa”.
Field of Dreams

That quote won’t make a lot of sense to those of you who haven’t seen the movie, but it resonates with me because I am standing in front of my own cornfield. I am staring at endless of rows of corn stalks wondering what I will find if I take the first step and wander in between them.

Except my corn field is an interstate highway that is going to take me far from home on the next part of this adventure we call life and I am pretty damn excited about it. I haven’t decided how much to share here yet or what stories I want to tell but I can assure you it can be described as a “mighty tale.”

Sharing and Story Telling

I lost my train of thought for a moment because Mess Around started playing on iTunes and I had to sing along with hit. Had to pretend that my keyboard was a piano and that I was Ray Charles.

That would have been quite the feat and a “mighty tale” in its own right. Imagine for a moment that a forty something white Jewish man who can’t sing or play and instrument began channeling the spirit of a highly talented, much older and much deader Black man.

Of course it didn’t happen so we can set that aside and listen to me prattle on about the boundaries in blogging because they do exist.

Blogging is about story telling and sharing with others–it is the secret sauce that helps the colonel sell his wares. But it is also about knowing what not to share and when.

Kind of funny to me because I am not prude and often unfiltered, but there are things I won’t let you know about because they aren’t mine or because I don’t want others to take the hit that may come from my saying precisely what I think.

What The Evolution of Change Is About

I suppose it is just a long winded way of my sharing that some big scary but really freaking exciting changes are about to take place in my life. I expect them to be meaningful, wonderful and powerful.

Yeah, there is much “ful” going on there.

If you are interested in learning more keep walking down the road with me and maybe I’ll toss a couple more nuggets your way. Or maybe not.

The only thing I can promise is that there will be more posts for you to read.

Got to run the Traveling Jack show has a lot of work to do before we hit the road.

Filed Under: Life

The Joy Of Writing

January 22, 2013 by Jack Steiner 36 Comments

The Big Cheese of Dad Blogging
The Big Cheese of Dad Blogging. Love this stuff.

Sometimes I miss the old blogosphere where it felt like people were blogging because they wanted to share stories or because they loved writing.

I miss the days where we didn’t spend time worrying about whether we had built Facebook pages, Twitter followings and G+ outposts.  You didn’t feel badly if you weren’t picked as one of the Top 198 pickle bloggers, weren’t asked to be a keynote speaker at a blog conference or didn’t get pitched by Porsche to test drive their cars.

You just got to write for the joy of writing and for the love of sharing good stories. You enjoyed the camaraderie of others who knew we weren’t a bunch of losers living their mother’s basements.

Time Moves On

Time moves on and what once was is no more and that is ok. It is not just ok because we all have to adjust but because there are good things that come with the changes. There are new friendships and opportunities that draw our attention.

The kids and I talk about this often and how to roll with the changes that we face. It is funny to me because I don’t think of myself as being particularly adept at dealing with change but when I flip through the pages of the blog I see my impression isn’t entirely accurate.

I am much better at this than I realized and that realization is part of what I love about blogging. It is not just about the joy of writing or the friendships but of learning about ourselves and growth.

It feels rich and rewarding.

Old Posts and New

My son is going to be Bar Mitzvahed in December. It throws me and makes me smile at the same time.

That kid is a huge part of why I am a blogger. When I started he was a toddler and an only child and life was so very different from now.

Different doesn’t mean better either, it was just different, albeit easier in some ways. But time passes and things change and now the toddler is a preteen who has a little sister who has lit up all of our lives.

She has no bigger hero than her older brother but that doesn’t stop her from screaming at him from time to time or change the pride I feel when I see them playing together. They have their own world and own relationship that are separate from the rest of us and it is a joyful thing.

Those old posts in the archives touch upon some of that and make mention of the magic I felt then but they don’t have the same touch as the ones I write now.

Sometimes I read them and think I was a better writer then and sometimes I read them and wonder why people paid attention to such awful stuff.

Most of the time I don’t pay any attention to any of it and just come out here to write for the joy of writing because this is the present and it is where my primary focus has to be.

Just write baby, just write.

 

Filed Under: Just Write

Upside Down & Inside Out

January 21, 2013 by Jack Steiner 44 Comments

English: American Airlines Boeing 737-800 taki...
English: American Airlines Boeing 737-800 taking off from Los Angeles International Airport (LAX) in October 2007. Français : Un Boeing 737-800 décollant de l’aéroport international de Los Angeles (LAX) en octobre 2007. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I find people to be…fascinating. They are endlessly amusing creatures who like to think that the things that they do are based upon logic and reason, yet they aren’t. They rarely do anything that isn’t arbitrary in nature. We don’t like to admit these things. We don’t like stare at our own foibles or accept our own mortality.

It is late afternoon and I am seated on an American Airlines airplane waiting to fly back to Los Angeles. The seat belt sign is on and the flight attendants are preparing for takeoff.

My toe is tapping and my knuckles are turning white from gripping the seat. For a moment I wonder if I can crush the armrest with nothing but my fingertips. I am trying hard to think about anything and everything other than my father.

He lies unconscious in a hospital bed some 30 miles away from the airport. He is being kept alive by machines and medication. The flight home will take almost six hours and it is possible that he will die while I am in the air.

A short time earlier I sat next to his bed and spoke softly to him. In the midst of the beeps, clicks, clacks and whirling noises made by the machines that keep him alive I told him about his grandson and reminded him that his daughter-in-law is pregnant

Asked him to wake up for me, begged him to open his eyes and acknowledge me. Asked him not to die because I needed him. Told him that I want him to celebrate my 35th birthday with me and squeezed his hand, but he didn’t squeeze it back.

The captain makes a few announcements but I can barely focus. I don’t know what to do. I am not panicking because dad wouldn’t panic and so I won’t. But he is unconscious and I can’t do anything to help save his life- not from 3,000 miles away.

I close my eyes and think of my son. He is almost 3.5 and I can’t believe that there is a chance that my father will die before they really get to know each other. I can’t believe that he might not get to meet the baby who is yet to come.

Dad is a huge presence in my life and always has been. I feel guilty leaving him. I feel guilty leaving mom there. I hadn’t realized until this moment that he was/is human.

But I can’t stay. I am a father and I learned from my dad that I have to take care of my family.  My grandparents don’t know how serious this is. I didn’t tell them that I wasn’t sure if he would survive long enough for me to fly out and now I have to do it all over again.

I remember telling dad and grandpa about my uncle dying. I remember the pain in my father’s eyes and how I made grandpa cry. I told him that his youngest son was dead. Am I going to be forced to tell him about his oldest too.

The plane pulls away from the gate and begins to taxi towards the runway. For a moment I consider jumping out of my seat and demanding that they let me go. I am sitting close to and emergency exit. I calculate the distance between the door and my seat, figure that I can get there fast enough to open it and jump.

It is crazy and I know it. But my father might die. There is a voice telling me that I am betraying him by not being by his side.

He wouldn’t have left me. That is not how our family works. I am the only son. I know him differently than my sisters. My grandfather wouldn’t leave me either. I can see him crying, can hear grandma say no. The moment haunts me. It is one of a few that stick with me.

The engines roar and as the plane gains speed I am pressed back into my seat. Now all I can do is wait and make silent promises to the future.

Filed Under: Yeah Write

One Step At A Time

January 20, 2013 by Jack Steiner 12 Comments

“A short while ago I stepped outside of my comfort zone and discovered that I had inadvertently left the key on the other side of the door.” Someone I Know

The mysterious they that people refer to say the best way to eat an elephant is one piece at a time. You do remember they, don’t you? They are the folks who have the answers to anything and everything.

Anyway I used to hate the “eat an elephant one piece at a time” expression but have come to appreciate it because it makes sense to me and when you are talking about philosophy that is important.

That is because the answer to the best way to go through life is subjective so we have to figure out what sort of path/approach makes our heart smile and our soul sing.

One Step At A Time

One step at a time is an expression that I have heard my entire life. I don’t want to wait to eat the elephant one piece at a time, I want to consume it all right now. I want to open wide and swallow the damn thing in one bite.

While it might be fair to say I have a big mouth even I don’t have the sort of gaping maw that can handle that bad boy–not to mention that my dysfunctional digestive system would enter full mutiny mode and that is a battle I am not real interested in fighting.

So when there is a lot going on and I feel a bit crazed because my to do list feels like it will never be to done I have learned to take a deep breath.

As my grandfathers and father have taught me I can only do what I can do so there is no point in beating myself up about not being able to stop time, fly or see the future.

One step at a time means take care of my business as it comes and try not to worry because it is wasted energy.

Easy To Say But Hard To Do

My kids have heard all this many times. When they feel pressure because they think they have too much homework I smile and tell them to break it up into bite size pieces. ‘Don’t make yourself crazy trying to do everything at once. Focus on small pieces and in a short time you won’t have much if anything left to do.”

I said the words out loud while writing them and laughed because it was ridiculously easy. But I would be lying if I said my mind isn’t whirling at a mile a minute. I have got things to do and I can’t start some of them until I get answers to some questions.

But I can’t get these answers until the people I am waiting for give me answers to other questions so all of these projects are tied up in one giant domino line.

Writing Is Cathartic

Writing is cathartic. It makes me feel better to put these words on this page and share them with you.

That is because when you lay things out online it makes it easier to see just what sort of things we are dealing with. It helps put them into context and makes it easier to identify what is what, which is which and what my priorities should be.

If you haven’t tried it I highly recommend doing so.

Filed Under: Life

Rejection Is Fun

January 20, 2013 by Jack Steiner 2 Comments

English: Groucho Marx & anonymous blogging
English: Groucho Marx & anonymous blogging (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Several people have emailed me to ask if I would provide some more background about my newsletter so I thought I would share a sample issue with you here. If you like what you read I encourage you to sign up or if you are still unsure feel free to peruse the archives.

And now onto your sample copy of the newsletter:

Rejection Is Fun

Hi, — most of the time rejection isn’t much fun at all but it is something we all have to deal with.

The question isn’t whether you will be rejected but how you respond when it happens because it will happen.

So what do you do about it?

Don’t Let Ego Guide You

Every week I participate in a variety of writing contests and more often than not I lose.

I hate it.

I lose to people who aren’t as clever, creative or capable a writer as I am and it kills me.

It would be fair to say that last line is my ego speaking because it is. I firmly believe I am a better writer than most of the people who beat me, but that doesn’t matter.

Writing is subjective and I know some people love my work and some hate it. I know some are ambivalent about it too.

I also know that those of you who are writers/bloggers face the same challenges and that many of you feel the same irritation I do.

When things don’t go as you wish don’t let your ego make you do something foolish. Don’t complain or make a fuss because it rarely serves you and because rejection can be your friend.

Rejection Isn’t Just About Writing

Rejection isn’t just about writing either.

It can be about selling a product/service or yourself.

When it comes it is worth asking why it happened. It is worth trying to figure out where we fell short.

Sometimes what is measured subjectively can also be measured objectively. Your bad day might match up with someone else’s good day.

Act or React

The question is how do you respond to rejection. Do you act or react?

In this case we’ll say act refers to trying to determine what happened so you can adjust and see it doesn’t happen again.

React is what happens when you let your ego guide you and lash out.

This doesn’t mean you can’t be upset or that you shouldn’t be. It is just a suggestion that how you respond to rejection has a direct influence upon multiple aspects of your life.

What I Do

When it comes to these writing contests my response is to write more and to think about how I can do a better job of promoting my entries because I don’t pimp them out the ways others do.

Add in some exercise and laughter and you have my recipe.

What works for me might not work for you and that is ok. It is an individual thing.

Come Visit Me

Thank you again for spending some time reading my words here.

If you aren’t a regular reader of my blogs please feel free to read TheJackB and Words Left Unwritten on a more consistent basis.

Regards,

Jack

“When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun‘.” Groucho Marx

Filed Under: Writing

Ride The Snake With The Gold Dust Woman

January 20, 2013 by Jack Steiner 11 Comments

Every Sunday morning I make a point to participate in the five minute brain dump. It is a useful tool for practicing my writing and I like the way it helps to clear my mind.

I like trying to wash away the grains of sleep before I sit down with my children and listen to their Sunday morning stories. It is about being present and they need that from me.

My mind has always worked quickly and it is not unusual for me to be thinking about two or three things at once, but I don’t like doing that with them. I want them to get my full attention and that is not always easy to do.

Maybe it is because of me and maybe it is because of the journey I am on now because I am most certainly walking down my own yellow brick road but I don’t have any companions yet.

Or maybe I do, maybe there are a few that I just haven’t recognized. Maybe I am too focused on doing what needs to be done to recognize them. I ought to slow down and think about it because we all need a helping hand.

Someone might want to tell the flying monkeys and the witch to give me some clearance because although I am excited and quite happy I haven’t any time to fool around with their antics. I won’t just dump a bucket of water on the witch nor will I let the monkeys mess with me.

Unless they want 240 pounds of nasty they ought to stay away. Just ask the devil what happened the last time he met me in Georgia.

This journey is something else, it is fun and exciting but there is a certain amount of “nervousness” attached to it. But they are good nerves and I am still smiling.

Don’t know why but in the background of my mind I hear a mix of Dylan singing Knocking on Heaven’s Door, The Doors playing The End and Fleetwood Mac singing Gold Dust Woman.

**********************

This was my 5 minute Stream of Consciousness Sunday post. It’s five minutes of your time and a brain dump. Want to try it? Here are the rules…

  • Set a timer and write for 5 minutes.
  • Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
  • Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
  • Add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
  • Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.

Filed Under: Uncategorized

  • « Go to Previous Page
  • Page 1
  • Page 2
  • Page 3
  • Page 4
  • Interim pages omitted …
  • Page 6
  • Go to Next Page »

Footer

Things Someone Wrote

The Fabulous Archives

Copyright © 2025 · Jack Steiner

 

Loading Comments...