It was a long and unsatisfying day in many ways and I can’t blame any one person or thing other than me.

Well I could blame others and it wouldn’t be unreasonable or unacceptable but there is not much point in doing so because I can’t change them. Can’t get them to do a damn thing so I have to focus on what I am or am or not doing.

It is a rough place to be in because some of it is truly unfair, but life isn’t fair and you have to roll with the good and the bad.

Truth is some of what bothers me is of minor significance and I ought to frame it in its proper context because it would make me feel better.

But for some reason the last couple of days my swagger has been off and my mojo missing.

Got a few ideas as to why and given a good night of rest it may all feel different in the morning.

Probably the biggest issue is a general lack of support and a sense that I have no one to cover my back in the way I want it covered.

Again that might be incorrect and the product of a rough couple of weeks and a long day.

So I’ll grind out the rest of the evening and see what the morning holds. Only takes one thing to change it all.

I need 15 minutes to do a proper job of writing this post but only have five so we’ll adapt and overcome.

One of my favorite songs, but for some reason often forget about it.

It is fascinating to me and why some memories stick and others disappear. A mix of good, bad and in between they slumber and rise on their own schedule.

Got some conversations I need and want to have but am not sure when some of those will happen.

Can only control what we can control so we do our best to manage the rest.

Such a strange time of life when you feel like you know everything and nothing. When you know that one call can turn everything around and that it isn’t an impossible dream.

But still it is not as easy as just wishing it into existence.

Some changes are forever, two weeks until the first anniversary of my father’s death. That is one that isn’t going to change, he is gone forever.

If there is an afterlife and we find each other there that would be great, but it doesn’t change things now.

And so we just do our best to roll with the changes.

Times up, five minutes is over.

Got called a Texan, a carpetbagger and a few other choice names during the recent past and so I find myself reading/listening to stories about big earthquakes back home.

It is surreal to hear/read these things and to be so far away, especially with my mom, kids and so many other loved ones there.

The thing is I have lived through thousands of quakes and know the difference between the 4s, 5s and 6s.

It is exponentially different and if you haven’t felt one you don’t know that Mother Nature can make you feel very small without effort. Or maybe you have experienced some other natural event and appreciate some of this.

My daughter is sleeping at a friend’s house. They are without power and she is very calm. It is not the first time she has been through being without power or earthquake.

I talked to her and she was more interested in rushing me off the phone to hang out with her buddy so I was glad for that.

Didn’t tell her it is a little uncomfortable to be so far because there is no reason to. Chances are nothing will happen and there is no reason to worry her, so instead I share it with you.

Other Stories

There are other stories to share and tell but I think I may hold off on those for a bit. Mayhap to share them elsewhere or to wait until the morrow to give them their full due.

Do they have to do with the quote above?

Why yes they do.

Will Soulmates or discussions of soulmates be part of it/them?

Perhaps.

For now they remain so far away.