Relax grammar nazis, I know you are upset about the lack of punctuation in the headline and I don’t care. Wonder and worry why there is no question mark, period or exclamation point.
Makes no difference to me because the point is I wanted it to be ambiguous. I want it to be unclear because I am unclear about a few things right now. And lacking clarity I thought about Pinterest not because I want to stare at pretty, frilly and shiny things but because I like quotes and I have a partial collection there.
Channeling Harry Chapin
My son turned 12 last year and we are in the process of planning his Bar Mitzvah. It is going to take place around the tail end of this year and I am excited, nervous and amazed.
The little guy isn’t so little anymore. He is in middle school now and we have these conversations that blow me away.
Some of them are flat out funny, some are scary and some are just fine.
Sometimes I see signs of the little boy he used to be. Sometime he makes a gesture and I remember the baby who I used to hold like a football and how I wondered what he would be like when he got older.
And then the moment is gone and I see someone much older and I hear the present juxtaposed with the future. He is happy to talk to me, but he has things to do. I hear his voice and the tone is mine, the same one I use when I have to tell my dad I have things to do.
There are other things, other moments that bring out the whole Cats In The Cradle thing and I realize that everything I was ever told about kids growing up quickly is correct.
Who They Are and Who We Are
I am working as hard as I ever have to build a future for my kids that is different and better than what they have had. And that is not knocking what they have had because it has been good, but I am dad and my job is to find a way to kick it up a notch.
Part of that is tied into the changes I have made. Part of it is tied into the things I have done to make my personal satisfaction with life better and more complete because a happier father is a good thing for the kids.
And so I look at what is coming and try to plan for what I can. I look down the road and think about things and sometimes it makes me feel a bit crazy and I wonder if there is a quote that I can look at. I wonder if there are words that I can use when I write this next post or work on telling another story.
I work on building a deeper foundation so they have more to lean on should they need it and I see glimpses of a time when they won’t be living with me any longer and I’ll wonder if they are going to come home from school or if they are going to stay in the dorm.
The Bar Mitzvah is tied into all of it. It is another chance to make an impression upon the kids about our values. I won’t break the bank to put it on, but I’ll put something nice together because it is important.
This time of life for him is about to get even crazier.
Middle school, almost done with the first year and I can see how some of these kids are on hormonal overdrive. I can see these kids testing limits and trying to really figure things out for themselves.
It is filled with teaching moments and opportunities.
And I sit down and do my best to make good decisions for all of us. There is no way to balance it all, but it is impossible and wrong not to try.
So I do my best and shrug my shoulders because my gut says it will all work out.
I am not a huge Steve Jobs fan, but this one is appropriate because it describes my son. He isn’t driven or concerned with being popular. He knows what he wants and is going after it.
I hope he continues to always do so.
â€œYour time is limited, so donâ€™t waste it living someone elseâ€™s life. Donâ€™t be trapped by dogma â€“ which is living with the results of other peopleâ€™s thinking. Donâ€™t let the noise of othersâ€™ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.â€