500 Ways To Have Better Sex & Earn Money From Blogging

'The Open Road' -- Near Great Sand Dunes National Park (CO) August 2013

Five Songs

  • Carefree Highway- Gordon Lightfoot
  • I’m Free- Soup Dragons
  • Guitar, Cadillacs- Dwight Yoakam
  • American Girl- Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
  • If- Bread
  • Stairway To Heaven- Heart Cover

The worst part about moving five times in three years is realizing how many things you can’t find because they have been packed, unpacked, packed, unpacked and potentially given away.

If my children told me they couldn’t find something I would ask them how many times I have told them to put it in the same place and then shake my head but I wouldn’t mention anything I shared in the lead.

Yeah, it is hypocritical but I call it making use of a teaching moment and frankly I do a better job of making myself feel stupid than anyone so there is no need to open that particular can of worms.

Part of me is ambivalent about these missing items because very few of them are of any significance because I tend to be very good at making sure I know where the important stuff is, except for two items.

Two things that I intentionally left in Los Angeles because I figured they would be safer there and that I would come back for them and now they are gone.

500 Ways To Have Better Sex & Earn Money From Blogging

That headline is classic linkbait and I don’t apologize for it mostly because it’s so ridiculous it is hard for me to believe anyone will take it seriously.

But if you are someone who took it seriously and want me to teach you how to have better sex and earn money from blogging I can do so.

I probably shouldn’t give this information away for free because I could turn it into an ebook or webinar and make a couple of bucks from it.

The problem with doing that is I might piss off some bloggers and since bloggers are a sensitive lot who believe that having a platform provides them with license to bitch about anything.

One can never be too careful with the hordes of the misinformed, misguided and self righteous who will pound you based upon their limited understanding of topics that are both simple and complex.

But since I promised the first tip I have to having better sex is to fall madly in love with the person you are sleeping with. If you follow my advice and fall head over heels for them and they for you those moments where you do the horizontal Mambo will be magical.

If you want to earn money from blogging figure out how to write a blog that is entertaining and educational and then charge people $25 for a year long membership.

Or alternatively you can try my favorite method and charge blog cancellation fees.

Just remember if  you don’t appreciate my methods and wish to file a complaint be cautious about your approach or you might find yourself in the same position as the Flying Clown.

Incidentally I did receive one comment for having the strangest audio log ever. I took that as a compliment but sadly was unable to monetize it.

Carefree Highways

I have been fortunate enough to drive cross country multiple times not to mention been on many other road trips around this grand old U.S. of A. and can tell you that some of those trips have been filled with more fun and interesting moments than you can shake a stick at.

Cross country trips by plane may be faster and have their set of moments but you don’t get to see and experience the tiny details of life that a car trip provides you with.

Car trips give you the opportunity to stop and explore local hot spots and museums that you will remember forever, sometimes because it was truly interesting and sometimes because you can’t figure out how many other idiots besides you got sucked into spending three hours perusing the Roly Poly Good Old Boys Sugar Shack.

By the way, if you haven’t figured it out yet sometimes I blog for the love of writing and not solely for the magic that comes with being Internet Famous.

Although let’s be honest there is something very cool in being able to say you are Internet Famous and 28 people of the 3000 who went to a blogging conference shook your hand and walked away feeling like their lives had been changed.

Or maybe they walked away wondering why their hands were sticky and trying to figure out if there is a polite way to rub those aforementioned sticky hands on their pants.

The End Of Summer

My kids finished their first full day of school today. Technically they went back yesterday but it was a partial day so today was the first full day.

I of course made sure to do the Dad’s So Happy They Are Back In School Dance for them. Turns out they love that dance so much my daughter doesn’t want to share it with anyone else. She swore she won’t bring any friends home to see it and I promised to do it again for her.

She made a face so I told her that if she is really lucky one day I’ll do that dance for her boyfriend…in my underwear.

I figure there are two ways to handle the boys that one day may come home with her.

1) Tough and intimidating dad.

2) Crazy and unhinged dad.

If she is really lucky I might even do both.

Here is a separate but related question for you.

Are you having fun blogging?

If you can’t say yes you better figure out a way to make it fun or you might not last as long as some of the crazy old men of the blogosphere.

Second question, are the crazy old men of the blogosphere crazy because of blogging or did they start out that way.

Let me know what you think in the comments.

(Visited 217 times, 1 visits today)

11 Comments

  1. Pingback: This Post Is Not About Sex Or Blogging

  2. Pingback: Weapons of Mass Blog Destruction

  3. Sebastian Aiden Daniels August 16, 2014 at 9:02 pm

    Hehe. Well I guess I better start to charge a membership ; D.

    I do have fun blogging and interacting with other bloggers unless I focus too much on social media or on blog stats then I just feel sad because it will “never be enough.” Always more more, so I try to stay away from focusing on that stuff since it makes unhappy.

    You go crazy from blogging. Btw be the crazy unhinged dad.

    • Jack August 16, 2014 at 10:36 pm

      I love being the crazy unhinged dad. It suits me. You are right about stats, those things can make you crazy. I used to have far more traffic than I do, mostly because I was much better about commenting on other blogs.

      Sometimes I miss those days, but most of the time I am just happy I can write.

  4. Larry August 14, 2014 at 8:50 pm

    Wait, did you move recently? I know you have in the past and talked about the possibility of doing it again. However, if you did already, I missed something

  5. Adi August 14, 2014 at 10:51 am

    There’s lot of advices on writing quality blog post but very little advice about 500 ways of having sex…really not fair 🙂

  6. Stan Faryna August 13, 2014 at 7:42 pm

    “I do a better job of making myself feel stupid than anyone so there is no need to open that particular can of worms.”

    I feel the same way.

    Lots of gems here. You’re blogging hard and fast these days…

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

  
Please enter an e-mail address

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

You may also like