Been a million years since the days of The Hearts Wants What It Wants and I have learned more than a few things about life, love and how sometimes the pieces fit or…don’t.
Back then there were moments of insanity or at least what felt like insanity, times where I looked into the mirror and saw a reflection in my eyes that scared me.
It was a look of determination and iron, a willingness to go places I had never thought I Â would go and to do things I had never thought I would be willing to do.
You can call it a denial of reality and or a refusal to accept what was staring me in the face. It was when the great battle between head and heart took place and the most unexpected outcome was that head lost.
That is because it seemed impossible that heart would outwork head. Head had always won the battles that had paved the past but this time was different because heart gave all to love and swore death would take him before he let head win again.
It wasn’t hyperbole or melodrama.
This time it was coming to terms with knowing where the source of so much unhappiness lay. Heart laid it all out there and head acquiesced because he understood the future could not be appreciated or understood or explored in theory. It could only be experienced and if it was to experienced it had to be done so…fully.
If You Could Read My Mind
It was never if you could read my mind it was always open to you as yours was to me. They were only closed off when we let fear and uncertainty drive us away from each other.
Only closed when anger blinded us to what we always knew was there.
There were more than a few moments where we succumbed to worry and fell afoul of logic and reason. It took a long while to recognize that what we felt could be seen and understood but not under the terms of science. We couldn’t rely upon the math or logic that provided the framework of the physical world because the one we occupied on earth is not the same as our hearts shared…elsewhere.
The thing is that the blindness came from the same place as the temporary insanity that made us believe we couldn’t walk down the carefree highway that life offered to us.
Every time we tried to stay angry and apart we failed.
Someone once told me that women never really remember the pain of childbirth which is why they can go through it multiple times. I don’t know if that failure of memory is tied into our situation but I know that every time we tried to split up we failed because it was too damn painful to be apart.
It always brought us back together.
Take AÂ Moonlight Ride With Me
Sometimes the in between moments were harder than I ever expected them to be, especially when you did your best to close your thoughts to mine. But when I closed my eyes and silenced the noise inside I always found your heart waiting for mine.
Your fingers slipped inside mine and we wandered around our world communicating in silence as clearly as we did with words.
When the moments of madness came and you left I would wait for the moment to pass and ask you to take a moonlight ride with me. You didn’t always accept and though I hated to be refused I never pushed because I always knew that patience would be our friend.
And every time you took my hand our connection grew stronger and it became clear that some people are in our lives for moments and others a lifetime.
Heart understood that long before head because it didn’t need to rely upon science to prove that 2+2 equals four.
Heart knew that those moonlight rides were the building blocks and frameworks of a foundation that was built for the long haul. Eventually that which was experienced only at night would manifest itself during the daylight and the schizophrenia that heart and head felt would be no more.