Fear Is A Writer’s Friend

Clown
Writing blog posts should scare you but not to the point where you fear to press publish.

When you touch raw nerves and share the battered and bruised pieces of your heart you give your readers the opportunity to really get to know you. You give them the chance to see you are not the perfect father/mother/executive who produces posts that read like polished perfection.

The benefit of going deeper and letting people see who you really are or hear the stories that still embarrass you and or make your heart ache can be huge.

It is the kind of thing that propel you from a position as just another voice in the blogosphere to something more. It is the kind of thing that make people want to know more about you and to do so from a very honest and understanding place.

But that doesn’t mean there is no risk.

People may not respond at all or they may be cruel in a way that only happens behind the cover of a keyboard.

All of my fiction contains elements of truth. When you ask me to tell you the back story behind An Uncertain Certainty and New Year’s Eve I intentionally refrain from telling you what is true and what is false because it is not your business.

But that doesn’t mean those things didn’t happen or that they did.

There Are Boundaries In Blogging

There are boundaries in blogging and stories I won’t share and those lines change. Some of them change because as my children age I am more cognizant about what tales might hurt, embarrass or upset them.

When they were little the dad blogger fodder was plentiful because I didn’t worry about what might happen if those stories were shared in their middle or high schools but now I do.

Sometimes it is challenging to not give into my unfiltered nature. I want to write with reckless abandon and just tell the tales I know and those I see.

I taught Frank Sinatra How To Sing is the kind of story that begs to be shared and unraveled like a scroll.

I know some of you are dying to know what happened with the scary clown in the picture above. You want to know about how he scared my kids and how the Steiner children took a deep breath and then roared at the clown.

The clown was undaunted and he kept coming but he didn’t understand the Steiner kids know that lying down is not an option so they advanced upon him.

It didn’t hurt those rug rats know their daddy will take a bullet or step in front of a bus for them and do so without thinking. What they don’t know is that I never forget the moments where I feel like I fell short.

A Good Father

I know I am a good father. I carried us up the side of Everest and then when the Sherpas had taken them all to safety I took on the Yeti, Bigfoot and every boogey man that followed.

But I took a beating and I paid a price for my choices.

Would I do it again?

Of course. Steiners don’t lie down or run away but sometimes running straight into battle isn’t the smartest thing.

One of the things I love about my son is how methodical he is and how carefully he plots out his moves.

When I was in school I was always among the first to turn in my assignments. My grades were excellent and most of the time I made relatively few mistakes.

My son is rarely among the first to turn in his work. He likes taking his time, checking and rechecking his answers because he hates making a mistake because he moved too quickly.

It is a quality that will serve him well in life.

Decisions and The Universe

My good friend Ralph Waldo Emerson tells me I should look at recent events and remember these words:

“Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

I made a checklist of things that I had to in the short term to improve things for my family and  made a number of promises about what I would do to make them happen.

You can check them off of my list, they have all been accomplished but in the process I turned the apple cart over faster than expected and now I find myself having to dip, duck and dodge sooner than I had anticipated.

I felt like I had gotten sucker punched but like you see in the movies I wiped off my face, shook my head and took three steps forward.

Well played universe, but remember Steiners don’t lie down because lying down is not an option.  I am looking forward to seeing what comes next.

And now if anyone asks you can tell them I am scared and I am nervous but fear can be your friend. Fear reminds you that you are alive and it gives you energy.

Fear can be the great motivator, the question is will you be smart about how you use it.

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2 Comments

  1. Sebastian Aiden Daniels June 25, 2014 at 11:48 am

    What a frightening picture haha. That is the creepiest clown I have ever seen. I would have shit my pants if I was a kid. Fear can help us grow to new heights as a writer. I can imagine the line that you have to draw in your writing if you have kids because you don’t want to hurt them.

    I don’t know if you ever saw the Time Magazine cover about the woman who still breast feeds her six year old child. It was a picture of the six year old sucking on his moms tit. It had the tit covered, but you get the picture.

    That kid is going to be relentlessly teased when he is older. Poor kid.

    • Jack June 26, 2014 at 12:53 pm

      That kid is going to be messed with. I understand the point she was trying to make but to do so at his expense, well…

      Got to love that clown. 😉

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