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"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

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A Note to my Coworker

September 13, 2005 by Jack Steiner

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Dear Madam/Sir,

I was a little surprised to see that you were so hungry that you needed to eat my food. Yes, the meat in the ziplock bag that was placed inside of the Target bag was mine. I brought it so that I wouldn’t have to eat out each day, you see I like try and save some money here and there and it made sense to bring my own lunch.

And since I am careful about managing my time I brought enough for several days. It never occurred to me that someone might choose to help themselves to it. It is common knowledge that the soda and water is for anyone and everyone in the company to enjoy and unless I am mistaken there wasn’t a note advising people to join in on the deli meat delight.

So for reasons that still remain unclear to me you opted to eat my meat. If I used my son’s terminology you would be not nice and a bad boy/girl.

But things have a way of working out and I suspect that you found that although the meat was quite tasty it didn’t agree with you. I witnessed the many trips to the bathroom and walking by your desk confirmed that you were engaged in chemical warfare.

As someone with GI problems I really shouldn’t gloat, but I find it hard not to smile. A lack of common courtesy coupled with meat that had hit the downside made this a lesson you will not soon forget.

As a sidenote I should add that the day before the meat had wreaked havoc upon my system.I had meant to dispose of it that day, but got involved in a couple of office projects and forgot to do so.

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Filed Under: Bathroom Stuff, Random Thoughts

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