I don’t remember the first time I read that quote but it has kept me company now for almost a full year.
If you are among those who believe things happen for a reason and that there is something more to this world you might appreciate my saying that part of the reason I have held onto it is because it felt appropriate for this time.
Even if it was nothing more than coincidence it was useful and for that I am grateful, especially because it introduced me to other quotes and excerpts from Murakami like the one below this sentence.
That line there resonates with me as a father and as a person.
Ask my kids about how many times we have spoken about the value of being your own person and the strength it sometimes takes to move away from the crowd so that you can learn more about yourself as a person and try to focus on what makes you truly happy.
Dad Bloggers and Dads In General
Sometimes the kids ask me for examples of how I do things differently from other people and why.
Can’t tell you how many times I have used blogging as an example and talked about how I don’t play the game the way others do.
But I always tell them there is a contradiction at work in my actions and in life in general.
I tell them they need to figure out when it makes more sense to join the crowd because there are times where it is better to go along to get along.
And then in the next breath I talk about the importance of not doing things just because others are doing it and how sometimes the coolest thing you can be is yourself.
When they ask me if I am going to blog about these conversations I shrug my shoulders and say I don’t really know because I haven’t decided if I should.
“Dad, how do you get more free stuff for us?”
I tell them that it is about connecting with the right people and that because dear old dad doesn’t play the same way many of the others do he doesn’t get invited to join.
“So why not change your style so that you can get more invitations?”
I nod and smile and tell them I prefer to do it on my terms.
“Does that mean that you never try to be a part of the crowd?”
I nod and smile again.
“No, sometimes I fall in line because I hear about a program I want to be a part of and it is easier to get the invite if I adjust how I do things.”
“Daddy, it sounds like you make it up as you go.”
“Bingo! That is exactly how I operate. I make it up as I go and act as I do based upon a gut feeling. It is not logical but it doesn’t need to be for this.
51 Dumb Mothers & The Fathers That Love Them
Add that to the list of ridiculous headlines I have used here.
It is definitely not the craziest but don’t ask me to tell you which one that is because I am too damn tired. If you really need to know you can take a look over here and see what you come up with.
When I first sat down to write this post I played around with writing a more structured piece. I thought about talking about places to get free stock photography, blogging about how to become a better writer or sharing another story about the kids.
I came damn close to integrating all of them.
Would have been easy to share a story about homework hell or what happened when my daughter pierced her ears for the second time.
Could have told you to remember every story has a beginning, a middle and an end but I just didn’t feel like it.
Because I have this feeling that I am about to finish walking through part of the storm Murakami talks about.
The 10 Year Storm
Truth is I didn’t want to write about how unsettled I feel and the sense that there is not nearly as much support for what I am trying to do as I would like.
Writing won’t change any of those things and I have enough clarity about what my goals and intentions are to not need to write it down.
This new job is fine, but it is not what I want and even though I could be very good at it I need to keep pushing for the next thing.
I can’t stay where I am because the ground is crumbling beneath my feet.
What kind of father would I be if I didn’t show my children that you never stop trying to get to where it is you want to go.
Tonight I played two hours of basketball and though I played well I felt empty out there. I felt like a ghost was playing for me and that is not what it is supposed to be about.
There just wasn’t the same amount of joy on the court and that made me feel a bit sad because that place is often where I feel most alive.
I am not the same guy anymore and I don’t feel the need to try and be him. I am too focused on moving into the man I am going to become.
For the moment I am satisfied with trying to enjoy the guy I am but that is only because there is no point in not enjoying the present.
But life is made to be lived and not just passed through and that my friends is precisely why I am going to do what I have to do regardless of how much support I have or not.
P.S. Shamless Shilling
Did you ever readÂ The Fifty Posts You Didnâ€™t Read On New Yearâ€™s Eve?
Take a look at it and I promise you’ll find at least two good posts that will hold your attention and entertain you.