The JackB

"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

Scammers

Scamming the Scammer Again

by 11 Comments

English: The Seal of the United States Federal...
English: The Seal of the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation. For more information, see here. Español: El escudo del Buró Federal de Investigaciones (FBI). Para obtener más información, vease aquí (Inglés). (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

If you are among the 17 long time readers you know that periodically I will engage with the knuckleheads that send me emails promising me untold riches for helping them try to defraud others. Today I received another one of those emails and decided to see what would happen if I responded to his inquiry.  Here is a copy of his email and my response:

GOOD DAY,

Please kindly accept my apology for sending you this email without your consent. I believe you are a highly respected personality, considering the fact that I sourced your email from the peoples search database on the web during my discrete search for a foreign partner whom can assist me in taking this business to it success.

Though, I do not know to what extent you are familiar with events. I have a proposal for you.This however is not mandatory nor will I in any manner compel you to honor against your will,but I hope you will read on and consider the value I offer. My name is Mr.Richard Tang Yat Sun, I work with the Hang Seng Bank Hong Kong.I have a business proposal in the tune of US$24.5m to be transferred to an offshore account with your assistance if willing.

After the successful transfer, we shall share in ratio of 50% for you and 50% for me. Should you be interested, please respond to my letter immediately,so we can commence all arrangements and I will give you more information on the project and how we would handle it. You can contact me on my private email:( tang_richards@yahoo.com.hk) and send me the following information for documentation purpose:

(1)Full name:

(2)private phone number:

(3)current residential address:

(4)Occupation:

(5)Age and Sex:
I look forward to hearing from you.

Kind Regards,

Mr. Richard Tang.

My reply:

Dear Mr. Tang,

I am ever so glad to hear from you. I was recently speaking with my associate the ever graceful Sunny Delight about the need to not only ingest more Vitamin C but to find a business partner. Not just any partner but someone of quality, security, and integrity like yourself.

Sunny D. told me that she agreed that such a person would be like an astronaut from outer space yet clearly from inner space such as that occupied by the small room we are typing this from.

Per your request I am prepared to send you information of both needs and necessity

(1)Full name: James Tiberius Kirk Jack Edgar Hoover III

(2)private phone number: (202) 324-3000

(3)current residential address: 935 Pennsylvania Avenue Northwest Washington D.C., DC 20535-0001

(4)Occupation: Director of Outreach

(5)Age and Sex: I’m 41 and have sex as frequently as possible

Prior to engaging in carnival endeavors with you I need to tell you that in my culture it is customary to begin business by an exchange of pictures. What I need from you is a picture of you holding a fish over your head.

We believe that life comes from water and since fish live in the water this will provide us luck, fortune and dinner. As soon as I receive that from you I will know that we can proceed.

Thank you,

James Tiberius Kirk Jack Edgar Hoover III

I’ll keep you posted as to whether he responds to my note. Sometimes they do and sometimes they don’t. Incidentally the telephone number and address above belong to the FBI.

Nigerian Scam Artist

by Leave a Comment

I used to really wonder if anyone ever fell for any of the Nigerian email scams. On more than one occasion I have had moments of fun by playing with them. Long time readers may recall reading about some of them. Perhaps when the Shmata Queen returns from her vacation I’ll ask her to share her favorite one.

In the interim if you haven’t gotten a chance to review any of my antics here are a few links to review:

I am Rich Again- How Much Luck Do I Deserve
More About My Good Fortune
Give Me Time and I will Be Rich, Rich, Rich

That leads into a story I just read about a boy who was taken in by these scammers. Let’s look at two excerpts:

“A Leamington man has fallen prey to international scam artists who strung him along for more than a year with the promise of millions in cash, but ultimately bilked him and his family of $150,000.

John Rempel said he quit his truck driving job, lost friends, borrowed money and rossed the globe in pursuit of a non-existent inheritance, after he was contacted by e-mail in what is known as a Nigerian 419 scam.

Rempel said he borrowed $55,000 from an uncle in Mexico and his parents gave him $60,000 on credit to cover fees for transferring $12.8 million into his name.”

and

“The man then told him he had to pay $2,500 to transfer the money into his name. Then there were several more documents. Some cost $5,000.

He was told to open an account at a bank in London. That required a $5,000 minimum deposit. The crooks later sent him an e-mail with a link to what he was told were details of his new account. Some money had been transferred there for “safe
keeping.”

“Everything was good,” said Rempel.

Then he got an e-mail from a government department — he’s not sure which country — saying he owed $250,000 on tax on his inheritance. Rempel spoke to his contact, who told him they negotiated the fee down to $25,000.

Rempel went to Mexico where his uncle owns a farm. His uncle gave him $10,000 cash and money for a plane ticket. He was going to London to make sure it was legitimate.

“I had $10,000 in cash in my pocket and my uncle sent another $25,000 when I was over there.”

In London, Rempel met some people and handed over the $10,000.

They met Rempel the next day with a suitcase. They said it had $10.6 million in shrink-wrapped U.S. bills. Rempel wanted more proof. His new friends pulled out one bill and “cleansed” it with a liquid “formula,” which washed off some kind of stamp.
Rempel was told that process made the money “legal tender.”

I sort of feel bad for the guy, but I have to wonder about the rest of the family as well. Sounds like an entire family fell hook, line and sinker for this. Sometimes you have to use common sense.

Suha Arafat Wants To Share Her Wealth With Me

by 15 Comments

Folks I received another one of those friendly notes in which the author explains that in exchange for my help I can receive a sizable sum of money. If you have been following the blog at all you know that upon occasion I have engaged these scam artists in conversation.

The latest is so ridiculous I can’t begin to explain it. Anyway, I received the note below yesterday. I haven’t edited it in any way. What you see is exactly what I saw.

This item from National Association of the Deaf has been forwarded to you by Mrs Suha Arafat Yasser.

Dear Friend, I am Mrs. SUHA ARAFAT, the wife of YASSER ARAFAT, the Palestinian leader who died in Paris. Since his death and even prior to the announcement, I have been thrown into a state of antagonism,confusion,humiliation, frustration and hopelessness by the present leadership of the Palestinian Liberation Organization and the new Prime Minister. I have even been subjected to physical and psychological torture. As a widow that is so traumatized, I have lost confidence with everybody in the country at the moment You must have heard over the media reports and the Internet on the discovery of some fund in my husband secret bank account and companies and the allegations of some huge sums of money deposited by my husband in my name of which I have refuses to disclose or give up to the corrupt Palestine Government. In fact the total sum allegedly discovered by the Government so far is in the tune of about $6.5 Billion Dollars. And they are not relenting on their effort to make m e poor for life. As you know, the Moslem community has no regards for woman, hence my desire for a foreign assistance.You can visit the BBC news broadcast below for better unde rstanding of what I am talking about. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/3479937.stm http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/3995769.stm I have deposited the sum of 18 million dollars with a security firm abroad whose name is withheld for now until we open communication. I shall be grateful if you could receive this fund into your bank account for safe keeping and any Investment opportunity.This arrangement is known to you and my personal Attorney.He might be dealing with you directly for security reasons as the case may be.My Attorney lives in London (UK) because i want him to be far away from my country Palestinian for the fear of my Governemnt. In view of the above, if you are willing to assist for our mutual benefits, we will have to negotiate on your Percentage share of the $18 mi llion that will be kept in your position for a while and invested in your name for my trust pending when my Daughter, Zahwa, will come off age and take full responsibility of her Family Estate/inheritance.If you are honest, I am going to entrust more funds in your care as this is one of the legacy we keep for our children. In ca se you don’t accept please do not let me out to the security and international media as I am giving you this information in total trust and confidence I will greatly appreciate if you accept my proposal in good faith.You are to contact me on this email address( mrssuha@pc.nu ) and send me your full names andyour contact telephone numbers,cell number for my attorney to contact you for us to proceed immediately.Please expedite action is needed. Yours sincerely Mrs Suha Arafat

Source:

http://www.nad.org/site/pp.aspx?c=foINKQMBF&b=1359203

Here was my response:

Dear Madam Suha,

I was so very pleased to receive your letter from the National Association of the Deaf. I am fluent in multiple signs including flipping the bird so this note spoke loudly to me.

My heart breaks when I think of your situation. It is with great joy that I undertake this event. I might even have to set sail on my ship the Altalena to help you. I have my own crew, the Stern Gang so it would be easy enough to engage their support.

I wonder if I might set my attorney in motion. The honorable Sharon Bibi of the Bank of Levi Eshkol has represented me for years. It seems to me that it might make sense to contact him. He is wise, discrete and an able man who can take care of facilitating a proper place for the funds.

Since I am a man of means and wit I would ask that you give me 27.3%. In addition as I am a spiritual man I will require that you also donate funds to several charities, such as the JNF.

What can we do to push this along?

Kind Regards,

Jack Yerushalmi

In response I received two more notes.

Dear Jack Yerushalmi,

Thanks for your response. I have given your email address to my lawyer Mr Christopher Hall who is base in the UK London to contact you for the full detail.
Thanks

Mrs Arafat

Here is the subject line from the next note:

Information from Mr Christopher Hall the lawyer to Mrs Suha Arafat From Palestinian

Attention Jack Yerushalmi,
You sound real and ready to listen to the cry for help
of Mrs Arafat and i must say i am very impress and i
will always prefer to work with you. The private
organisation in costodian of this fund is in Holland
Nertherland,it will be of a great favour towards the
completion of this transaction if you will be dealing
with them as the beneficiary bearing in mind the
sharing ratio of 30 percent of the total fund of 18
million United states dollars.
You will be dealing with the diplomats of this
organisation who are special attachees to the
organization.
I will suggest that you speak with me on this no and
let us get knowing and trusting each other, telephone
no as follows+447024066333.
Thanks
Mr Christopher Hall

Here is my response to “Christopher Hall.”

Dear Mr. Hall,

The Netherlands are among my favorite. You are a dear klotzok. If you would be so kind to place your finger in a dike I am sure that we can make this work.

As I mentioned in my initial note in order to work together I need Arafat to agree to a few things.

1) A donation to the Hadassah Hospital and a note apologizing for all terror activities.

2) Agreement that should either party default they will be forced to spend time in cleveland.

3) And last two more charities must be included. A small donation to the Church of the Tree Frog and the Church of Charles Cheese.

Can you agree to these terms?

Regards,

Jack

Let the games begin.