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"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

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Archives for December 2008

Gaza Update 4.5

December 31, 2008 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

I finally jumped onboard and am part of Twitter. I am not sure yet how often I am going to use it, but who knows, maybe it will become a regular feature. You can find me at http://twitter.com/TheJackB.

This marks round up 4.5

Here are links to the previous editions:

Gaza Round Up Part One

Gaza Round Up Part Two

Gaza Round Up Part Three

Gaza Round Up 3.5

Gaza Round Up Part 4

Before we get to the round up here is an old joke:

************************
Dan Rather, Katie Couric, and an Israeli sergeant were all captured by terrorists in Iraq. The leader of the terrorists told them he would grant them each one last request before they were beheaded.

Dan Rather said, ‘I’m a Texan, so I’d like one last bowlful of hot spicy chili.’ The leader nodded to an underling who returned with chili. Rather ate it all and said, ‘Now I can die content.’

Katie Couric said, ‘I’m a reporter to the end. I want to take my tape recorder, then describe the scene here and what’s about to happen. Maybe someone will hear it and know I was on the job till the end.’

The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder, and Couric dictated some comments, then said, ‘Now I can die happy.’

The leader turned and said, ‘And now, Mr. Israeli tough guy, what is your final wish?’

‘Kick me in the ass,’ said the soldier.’

‘What?’ asked the leader? ‘Will you mock us in your last hour?’

‘No, I’m not kidding. I want you to kick me in the ass,’ insisted the Israeli.

So the leader shoved him into the clearing and kicked him in the ass. The soldier was sent sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm pistol from under his flack jacket, and shot the leader dead. In the resulting confusion, he jumped to his knapsack, pulled out his carbine and sprayed the rest of the terrorists with gunfire. In a flash, all terrorists were either dead or fleeing for their lives.

As the soldier was untying Rather and Couric, they asked him, ‘Why didn’t you just shoot them in the beginning? Why did you ask them to kick you in the ass first?’

‘What?’ replied the Israeli, ‘And have you two assholes report that I was the aggressor?!’
*************************************

In the news we have the following stories:

David Grossman is in the New York Times with Fight Fire With a Cease-Fire. Dershowitz is in the Christian Science Monitor with Israel, Hamas, and moral idiocy.

YNET reports that the rocket that hit BeerSheva was made in China and Hamas PM: Crazy war must end unconditionally.

Jameel and Aussie Dave are still live blogging the war.

Seraphic Secret has a great post up in which he exposes YouTube’s questionable behavior and reveals that the terrorists are hiding in hospitals. Go read And the Oscar Goes To…

Meryl has The result of the “lull” and discusses Hamas war crimes.

The Rebbitzin’s Husband explains Why didn’t Disengagement from Gaza work?

On The Fringe Writes what will it take to stop the terrorist attacks?

Yid With Lid featured the Return of the Bad Old Middle East and explains why Israel did not agree to a ceasefire.

From Joshuapundit Gaza:A Tale Of Selective Morality and Tribal Warfare.

At My Right Word Yisrael discusses a guest columnist in the WAPO
Amateur? Israel – Or Daoud Kuttab and The Washington Post? and responds to David Morrison’s anti-Israel article in the Irish Times.

Martin Kramer has Hamas and the Bushes.

At Writes Like She Talks you should read Gaza-Israel rocket range map in English & Hebrew. She also has her own round up to read.

PT Watch continues to keep count.

In The Atlantic you can read The problem with Israel-Palestine blogging. Israel Matzav responds to that here.

Mere Rhetoric shares:
Breaking: Arab Youths Spray Gunfire At Israeli Mall Workers In Denmark,
Oh-So-Brave Hamas Soldiers Fleeing Into Mosques And Hospitals
and Iranian Students Storm Multiple Embassies In Totally Uncoordinated, Completely Spontaneous Anti-Israel Protests.

Right Wing News has Gaza should thank Israel.

Jules Crittenden covered French Humanitarianism.

Check out Gaza: The Hedgehog, The Fox…And The Jackal.

American Power blogged World’s False Moral Equivalence Emboldens Terrorists. Rav Aviner has provided Hilchot Tzava – Halachot of the Army.

Confederate Yankee suggests that we Empty Gaza.

Filed Under: Gaza, Hamas, Israel

Not Quite a Recap- Let’s Talk about Body Parts

December 31, 2008 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

In an attempt to escape being seen as the All Gaza, All The Time blog I am going to regal you with tales on my adventures on the high seas. You ever notice that the term is always “high seas” and never lower. Maybe the Shmata Queen is correct about short people and things getting no respect.

Before the hostilities began I had intended to work on a general recap of the blog and my life in 2008. But as the saying goes, “People plan and G-d laughs.” So here I am with a watered down version that is going to cover a bunch of different things.

Let’s begin by relating a recent conversation with my son. Earlier this week the big guy followed me into the bathroom and decided that it would be cool if we both urinated at the same time. Yes ladies, sometimes even the boys hit the bathroom in pairs.

As we stood there I made sure to remind him to pay attention and suggested that we follow the Ghostbuster’s rule and not cross streams. In the midst of this the big guy looks at me and says:

Son: So that is what my penis is going to look like when I am a grown up.
Dad: I suppose. You’ll definitely be bigger than you are now.

Son: How big will I be?
Dad: I don’t know.

Son: How big are you?
Dad: I don’t know.

Son: Can’t you tell me?
Dad: Tell you what?

Son: How big your penis is. How many inches is it?
Dad: I have never measured it.

(It is a perfectly innocent conversation, but the juvenile side of me is fighting to whip out some crazy remarks. Something along the lines of it is 3 feet long and when I don’t use it I keep it rolled up like a danish or use it as a belt. But I don’t say that and he is smarter enough to know better.)

Son: Why not? Why haven’t you measured it?
Dad: I never cared. Didn’t have a reason to. It works just fine.

Son: Do they ever get to be too big?
Dad: Too big for what? (uh oh, where is this conversation going?)

Son: When you make a baby you have to stick it in a girl’s vagina. Do they get too big or too small.
Dad: Nope. Everything works.

(Since he is only 8 I decided to try and make it simple, but at this point I just know that simple isn’t going to completely satisfy him.

Son: How big are vaginas?
Dad: Big enough to take care of things.

(At this point I am tempted to tell him that it is similar to spelunking. The doctor puts on gloves, a miner’s helmet and ties a rope around his waist before he dives in to grab the baby. But since I know that he is probably going to tell his mother and others I restrain myself.)

Son: I see your smile. Tell me for real.
Dad: Everything fits the way that G-d intended it to. Do you have any plans to try this any time soon.

Son: Gross. I don’t even want to get married.
Dad: No problem. Enjoy being eight.

That last exchange marked another moment in which I had to restrain myself from making some obnoxious remark about things. I’ll leave that particular one to your imagination.

I’ll readily admit that I was happy to end the conversation. It is not that I mind talking to him or answering questions, but sometimes they go off on these wacky tangents and I never know when they might come back. But I was happy to note that he remembered enough from the how to make a baby conversation to ask relatively appropriate questions.

So back to our recap. In some ways 2008 has been an exceptionally difficult year. There is an awful lot that has happened that has been both challenging and unpleasant. But there have been some really good things too. What it really shows me is that my life really isn’t that different than so many other people.

This past year I pounded out just under a thousand posts. Here is a quick and incomplete look back at some of what appeared here:

I am In Love
What Benefits Do You Receive From Being President
Holding a Grudge
Is It Blogworthy
Some of My Favorite Posts
Thanksgiving in Mumbai
Music and Fragments of Fiction
I Am A Lonely Man
Must Blogging Have a Purpose
Dear Tooth Fairy
The Disappearing Accent
I Talk In My Sleep
Food For Thought
He Put a Gun To My Head
Do You Live Your Dreams
What Is Your Number One Tip For Building Traffic to The Blog
Anonymous Blogging
She Broke My Penis
What Makes You Happy
We Still Carry The Pain of Our Past Part II

Daddy You Died
The Best Break Up Songs
What Should Children Learn in School?
My Fourth Blogiversary- What Do I have To Say
Whether The Storm or Weather The Storm

How Long Do You Wait While on Hold
Cover Songs- Part 1
For A Good Time Call…
Death Comes For Us All- When Do you Start Saying Goodbye

Dancing WIth My Daughter
Second Annual Link To Jack Day
A Life Without Regrets
Coping With Sick Parents
My Dad Has A Problem
Penis Talk Revisited
Streets of Philadelphia

The Worst Album Covers- Ethel Merman Disco Mix
Paying For Private School- Part II
Playing With Your Webcam
Cheeseburger Leads to 911 Call

Filed Under: Blogging, Children

Gaza Update 4

December 31, 2008 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

I finally jumped onboard and am part of Twitter. I am not sure yet how often I am going to use it, but who knows, maybe it will become a regular feature. You can find me at http://twitter.com/TheJackB.

This marks the fourth round up. Here are links to the previous editions:

Gaza Round Up Part One
Gaza Round Up Part Two
Gaza Round Up Part Three
Gaza Round Up 3.5

(I know, Ben-Yehuda this is technically number 5.)

CNN reports that Israel has rejected a truce. Of course reports like this make it seem as if Israel is the bad guy and do a poor job of reflecting the real reasons for the hostility. It is shameful the manner in which some people try to minimize the threat of the rockets as if people shouldn’t care.

The BBC reports Israelis ponder ceasefire calls. Also from The UK We must adjust our distorted image of Hamas.

Don Surber reflects upon that last story here.

As is tradition allow me to remind you that liveblogging continues at IsraellyCool and The Muqata.

Jewish Current Issues says that A Proportionate Response Would Be to Eliminate Hamas.
Michael Totten writes What Would a Proportionate Response Look Like?.

Bookworm has a post called Hamas’ “Heroes” — and the need for total victory over evil.

Commentary discusses Sderot with Sderot Under Siege.

The Elder reports that Women and children deaths pretty low and includes If the IDF made Hamas-style videos….

Atlas Shrugs gives us ROUND-UP: UGLY PRO-HAMAS, ANTI-JEWISH RALLIES ACROSS AMERICA.

From Boker Tov Boulder Anti-Israel Pandemonium in Gaza City Fort Lauderdale FL USA

and

CNN “explains” the “evolution” of Hamas without ever using the word MURDER — Plus, What “Truce”?

Lady Light shares her thoughts here.

A new update will be published shortly.

Filed Under: Gaza, Hamas, Israel

Gaza Round Up 3.5

December 30, 2008 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

This is part 3.5 in a continuing series of round ups about the current situation in Gaza. It is a collection of posts and articles from around the world and blogosphere. If you have posts that you think should be included email them to talktojack-now-at-sbcglobal-dot-net or let me know in the comments.

Gaza Round Up Part One

Gaza Round Up Part Two

Gaza Round Up Part Three

First from the MSM:

At Ha’aretz Cabinet debating 48-hour Gaza truce as international pressure grows and Amos Oz: Hamas responsible for outbreak of Gaza violence.

The New York Times Amid a Buildup of Its Forces, Israel Ponders a Cease-Fire. Benny Morris on Why Israel Feels Threatened. And Egypt Offers Humanitarian Aid but Is Criticized for Refusing to Open Gaza Border.

YNET reports that rockets have reached Beer Sheva. JPost has Battlefront Twitter and an essay from Daniel Pipes called Insight into Bush’s ‘promising’ Middle East.

Der Spiegel has ‘Hamas Stupidity No Excuse for Israeli Overreaction’ and Egypt in Quandary as Gaza Raids Divide the Muslim World.

Jameel and Aussie Dave are still live blogging the war.

I suggest you read A Fatah Friend Writes: I’m Supporting the Israeli Air Force and Iran creates “war crimes” court for world to ignore.

At Mere Rhetoric you should review One-Third Of Hamas Launchers Too Deep In Residential Areas To Hit By Jet (Plus: Temporary Truce Rumors Debunked?)

Seraphic Secret has a post called Honest if Unlettered Arab Rhetoric.

Yid with Lid continues to cover the conflict Dershowitz on the Idiocy of Moral Equivalence, Cynthia McKinney Father Expect That She Will Try To Enter Gaza Again and Gaza War Videos You Won’t See on Mainstream Media.

Soccer Dad has a good post called Reporter, heal thyself and another that explores whether Israel’s actions are strengthening Hamas.

What War Zone has the Daily Gaza Update: Whatever

Boing Boing discussed technology and the war with Gaza Attacks: Two Related Reactions, in Second Life and Twitter. For a response to that post look here.

APRPEH offered Israel attacks Hamas: Euphoria Matured – Reality Settling In and Gaza War Message Confusion (what is the goal?)

Daniel Pipes has a dozen thoughts about Israel’s War on Hamas.

Daled Amos took Notes On Today’s Conference Call On Gaza. Mere Rhetoric took part too, America’s Voices Conference Call – Operation Cast Lead.

Completing the Mere Rhetoric trifecta is this post about public relations: Israel Launches High-Tech Public Diplomacy Outreach To Explain Operation Cast Lead.

At Hot Air you’ll find Assad calls for end to “massacre” in Gaza at meeting with … Arlen Specter.

Here is another note from Netivot.

Filed Under: Gaza, Hamas, Israel

Gaza Round Up Part Three

December 30, 2008 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

***Second Update 9:30 A.M. P.S.T.***
This is part three in a continuing series of round ups about the current situation in Gaza. It is a collection of posts and articles from around the world and blogosphere. If you have posts that you think should be included email them to talktojack-now-at-sbcglobal-dot-net or let me know in the comments.

Gaza Round Up Part One

Gaza Round Up Part Two

And now onto part three:

The IDF has some very interesting videos on YouTube. Check out IDFADESK.

Jameel and Aussie Dave are still live blogging the war. They both provide news and information that you might not see anywhere else.

The Sandmonkey is at it again with news about the Egyptian Embassy in Yemen and an Egyptian Officer that was shot by Hamas.

The WSJ has Israel’s Gaza Defense. ADD Rabbi provides a valuable service with BBC Translators.

The Rebbitzin’s Husband has the story Behind the United Nations’ War on Israel.
At LGF you can read Washington Post: ‘Amateur’ Rockets ‘Nagging’ Israel.

Daled Amos says: Four Days After Hamas In Gaza: Now What? Here is a link on Twitter that discusses Qassams in Sderot.

Carl has a video that shows how people live in Sderot.

Soccer Dad blogged about The Media Assault on Israel and on a post that is also crossposted on Yourish he asks the question Did a Hamas lie find its way into a Washington Post headline?

Baka Diary asks Where’s The Outrage in a post that puts names and faces to those killed in rocket attacks.

Yid With Lid has The GAZA Story That The Media DOESN’T Cover and a story about a Hamas terrorist who was killed.

Jules Crittenden asks So, What Next? Hyscience is Reassessing Sharon’s 2005 Gaza Pullout and they also shared Palestinian girl: ‘Hamas is the cause in the first place of all wars’.

The Right Truth blogged Another day and Israel is standing her ground. Incidentally I meant to blog about Caroline Glick’s column in which she mentions that Hamas has legalized crucifixion. Talk about medieval justice.

Glenn Greenwald is not taking advantage of a free vacation to Sderot. Meryl has had her hands full with some of the usual knuckleheads. It is worth taking a look at Hatemail of the day.

American Power blogged about how the World Rallies to Palestinian Cause

Commentary offers Sderot Under Siege. Israel Politik says Missiles Land in Ashkelon and
Citizens’ “Press” Conference on Twitter.

It is worth reading The Gaza War in The Atlantic. From Mother in Israel we have War in Gaza: Report from the Home Front.

Tzipiyah offers In Israel, Hospitality Replaces The Need For Refugee Camps. My Right Word reports that the Israeli Navy stopped a boat from reaching Gaza and links to a clip about The Dignity.

If you want to get a sense of what it is like to fall out of frying pan and into the fire click here. You can also read about the war situation in Netzer Hazani in Ein Tzurim here.

Lest we take ourselves too seriously Benji is Liveblogging reading blogs.

Want to help? Check out Raizy’s post here and Treppenwitz here.

Solomonia is getting the news out Boston: Support Israel Rally TOMORROW (Tuesday) at 5PM
Gateway Pundit is spreading the word, Support Israel Rally Tuesday Night In New York City. Back of the Hill is doing the same about a Counter Protest in Support of Israel in the Bay Area.

Filed Under: Gaza, Hamas, Israel

My Own Theme Song

December 30, 2008 by Jack Steiner Leave a Comment

A couple of years ago I put up a post about my own theme song. As I mentioned in the previous post it is time to revisit it. Since I am feeling a bit lazy I’ll post it again below:

Someone once suggested that life would be far more fun if we could walk around with a theme song. I kind of like the idea. If I could do it than I would want to have a rotation of songs to use.For example, here are the top five I would want right now:

O Fortuna– Orff
Hurt– Johnny Cash version
Raiders Of The Lost Ark: The Raiders’ March– John Williams
Jaws Theme– John Williams
The Empire Strikes Back: The Imperial March– John Williams

I still like most if not all of those songs, but just for kicks let’s add a few more to the list:

A New Game– NFL
Requiem for a Tower Movement 4– Cornerstone Cues
Get Down Tonight-KC and The Sunshine Band (Got to give S.Q. something)
Chariots of Fire– Vangelis
You’re All I need To Get By-Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell

What music would you pick?

Filed Under: Music, Things About Jack

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