The world is an uproar about parents, gorillas and children…today.
Today being the operative word because in a time of instant gratification and short memories you know they’ll forget about Harambe and move back to talking about the Kardashians or whatever the latest reality television scandal is.
But in the interim thousands of people know the name of the gorilla who was killed but can’t tell you the name of the child whose life was endangered, but they can tell you about how they are better parents than his.
Yeah, I am cranky, grumpy and disturbed by all this, as well as a million other things.
It is not because There Are No Coincidences either.
I am asking and trying to answer important questions like What Kind Of Person/Father Are You?
Maybe they aren’t important, significant or meaningful to others, but they are in my house and I figure if I focus on cleaning my side of the street I am doing something worthwhile for everyone.
Sometimes the biggest changes come from the smallest moments, minutes and actions.
I teach my kids that small victories lead to big ones and I follow that through thick and thin.
Blacklisted Secrets Bloggers Refuse To Share
I expect to get the usual complaints and comments about the headline because some will see it as linkbait.
Some of those who cry about it will be the same people who see nothing wrong in gaming the system as long as they are the ones who benefit and some will cry because they won’t spend enough time reading to find tips about blogging.
Now you have got to understand that under normal circumstances I don’t care what most people think and that at the moment the circumstances I am dealing with aren’t normal.
There are big changes taking place in my life and I am working on making some even bigger ones and none of this is happening on schedule.
It is like most things in life, coming at me when life decides and not when it is convenient.
I don’t view most of these things as being bad, they should be good but the nature of how they are coming is creating chaos.
And since I worked hard to try and prevent, avoid and or minimize chaos I am pissed off. Pissed off because I tried to plan and it didn’t work.
So I deal with what I have and not what I want, but it doesn’t mean I am not going to let my inner Taurus run free.
No Ferdinand the bull today, instead I give you my horns and a promise to stomp and trample.
Told the kids to remember the measure of a person isn’t found during peace and calm. It is discovered during chaos and confusion.
It is created and molded by the moment.
Drama is a ship you can sail and if you are a master sailor you will avoid the rocks, reefs and KrakensÂ of the deep.
Unless you are me in which case you look at the Kraken and figure, “Fuck, that sucker would make one hell of a story and so you break out your rod and reel ‘cuz you are going to catch the giant.”
Who is afraid of Leviathan?
Connect The Dots
You do recognize that I see all of this tied up in what Voltaire said, don’t you?
It is about asking questions of all sorts and figuring out as you go what the right question to ask is.
Reminds me of the parable about the guy who comes across evidence of what must be the greatest archer in the world.
The short version goes something like this:
a man is walking through the woods and comes across multiple arrows that are in the exact center of the bullseye.
After having come across forty or fifty he is convinced he has found evidence of Â the world’s greatest archer and is determined to meet him.
He searches high and low and eventually runs into a boy who is holding a bow and arrow. After a short discussion he discovers the boy is the master archer.
“You must tell me, what is your secret. How did you get to be so good?
The boy responds by saying he shoots his arrows and then draws the bullseye around wherever the arrow has landed.
That is how I try to live and how I teach my children to do so as well. Draw the bullseye around wherever we have landed.
Unfortunately that hasn’t changed some things for me, including the certainty that I am not living the life I am meant to be living.
This man I am now, well he is not a bad guy but he is not who I want to be so I am actively working on changing him.
That is why the crap that is going on now is irksome because I am pushing to make some things happen and this stuff interferes with my plan.
But we can’t control everything, can we.
This is not a midlife crisis now and it wasn’t then either.
It is an identity crisis and the only reason crisis is being used is because of my impatience and concern about not losing time.
We have such limited control over what happens, where it happens and who it happens with that I don’t want to wait to change it.
But rushing through things isn’t always the smart way to go either so I try to be purposeful and intentional.
Much as I kid around about moving through life like a ninja it is not true for me. I clear large amounts of space around and through wherever I lumber.
It is just how it goes and how it has been but the question isn’t about those things at all.
The question is very different and the way we answer and approach it is too.
Erik Christian Johnson June 7, 2016 at 5:13 pm
Where’ve you been all my life, Jack? Your writing alone is mesmerizing. I still don’t know exactly what is bothering you, but the title was awesome and I don’t care about linkbait anyways. Midlife crisis, no, identity crisis exactly. I hear you loud and clear. Just got back from a Shamanic retreat in Peru and lost my mind a little doing Ayahuasca to find a clue about my identity crisis. Your site will never leave my radar from now on and maybe I’ll find the reason you’re in angst and trying not to rush this life but find the answer asap. Thanks Jack.
Jack Steiner June 8, 2016 at 8:21 am
Thank you for the kind words, I really appreciate them. That retreat in Peru sounds like it was quite the adventure and that is something I am a big fan of, adventure.
Larry June 2, 2016 at 6:30 pm
Patience is not one of my virtues either.
Sorry you’re in such a state.
Jack Steiner June 2, 2016 at 9:29 pm
No worries my friend, it will all work itself out. Just a bit chaotic.
Janine Huldie June 1, 2016 at 1:36 pm
I am so not a patient person myself at times, but you are right about not rushing things to indeed have a better outcome.
Jack Steiner June 2, 2016 at 9:28 pm
Sometimes you have to let things unfold a bit because pushing just doesn’t work.