No One Hears Your Screams In Cyberspace

go with the flow

Sunday afternoon I treated myself to a massage. It was a spur of the moment decision so I went to one of those little pop up joints at the mall and paid for a quick twenty minutes.

The woman who led me to the chair told me in broken English that my back is too big for twenty minutes and suggested that I go for longer but I declined.

I already knew that twenty minutes wouldn’t be close to enough time to really work out of the knots but I couldn’t relax for that long.

Sort of a contradiction, but that is how I live my life and most of the time it works for me.

No One Hears You Scream In Cyberspace

Lately I have been slammed, jammed and crammed with work. I walk around tired and feeling like my head is in a fog and push myself to power through it because it is what I do.

I power through it all. Always have and always will.

Saw that Black Hockey Jesus has declared himself a non dad blogger. Read part of his rant about why and saw something about delusional men of limited talent or something like that and laughed.

Most of it looked like gibberish to me, but I haven’t ever been one of his fan boys nor tried to measure myself against him. There are other writers who I think are far superior.

It is sort of nasty to mention him by name and not provide a link but throwing down the gauntlet the way he did and closing comments is sort of a chicken shit move too.

This really isn’t me calling him out or trying to start a flame war, but I just didn’t feel like writing one of those posts where I alluded to someone and didn’t mention them.

There Is Nothing New Under The Sun

I read a guest post that ran on one of the “bigger business blogs” and rolled my eyes a bit.


Because it sounded like a bunch of posts that I have written but I didn’t comment because there is nothing new under the sun. These posts are often derivation upon derivation upon derivation.

He might not have ever read my words before and I wasn’t about to wade in swinging an angry typewriter claiming I had been wronged.

Too tired and  too ambivalent to push for an acknowledgment I might not deserve.

Ultimately I am here for the love of writing.

Deadlines, Assignments and Fatigue

Multiple deadlines and a boatload of assignments are waiting for me to grace them with my tender love and care. It is part of why I am feeling stressed, but not because I can’t handle them.

I just don’t feel like it and I am frustrated because normally I destroy these things. This is not difficult work, it is ordinary and I just need to do it.

I will do it.

That is not rhetoric. I wrote it down because it is how I make myself accountable to me.

And it is how I push and motivate myself.

The keystone in my arch of fatigue is tied into a lack of exercise.

Been several days since I hit the gym. I was concerned that my hamstring might be more than a momentary twinge and took it easy. But taking it easy is hard.

Time Is a Brutal Master

I am not old, not even close but I have pushed my body in so many ways for so many years it doesn’t always bounce back as fast as it once did.

No one beats time or so I have been told. But I have given notice to that brutal son-of-a-bitch that I am never going to stop trying. I’ll just keep looking for different angles.

Nonetheless I stayed away from the gym because I know myself well enough to know that if I went I wouldn’t take it easy. But today I am going because this mental malaise stems from lack of exercise.

I have to sweat or I will begin to scream and bellow. I will blow and it won’t benefit anyone.

So when I stop writing I will put on my shoes and go sweat.

Time to see if the 44 year-old hamstring is going to cooperate or not. Maybe it is a good thing I haven’t found a good basketball game to play in because I wouldn’t have sat on the bench.

The Kind of Father

I want my kids to see me as the kind of father who doesn’t give up in the face of adversity and challenge. I want them to see that dad takes care of himself and that when one solution doesn’t work he searches for another.

I am here because I love to write and because it is part of my mental health.

And now I am gone.

500 Push-Ups


Ask me to share my dreams with you and one of them will be the tale of the castle I wish to own. I don’t mean that in a metaphorical or figurative sense. I want a castle.

Really, who wouldn’t want to own a castle, private island, private jet and all that comes with it. It is not as silly as it may sound because I am interested in it. While money isn’t how I measure happiness it is a tool I can use to gather more experiences under my belt and owning a castle would be quite nice.

I would be good to the serfs and the peasants in the villages on my land. Lord Jack Steiner, the master of all he surveys- may his vision extend a thousand miles.

Sounds nice, doesn’t it.

Back In The World of Things That Are Easier To Obtain

There was a time in my life when I could 500 push-ups in a day without much effort. Hell, I got to a point where I could picture doing 1,000 but I got bored.

Ok, that is not true, my girlfriend got bored and when you are 19 you listen when your girl says she wants to be part of your exercise session. So I was silly and I listened. Doesn’t mean I gave up exercise altogether because I didn’t but things changed.

Didn’t happen overnight but it feels like it and unlike my dreams of owning a castle this is something I can fix in a relatively short period of time.


Retsu06 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Yes, I am working my way towards being able to do 500 push-ups a day again. And for those who are curious I doubt I am going to try to hit 500 in a row.

I have done that, but I was still in my twenties the last time I did it and I am more cautious about what sort of strain I place on my body. Yep, I just admitted I am not invulnerable anymore.

Please don’t share that with anyone as my fragile male ego can’t take it. I’ll probably end up hiding under my desk and once the shame wears off I will come find you and kick you right in the butt with my size 12 boot.

Why 500 Push-Ups?

When and if you ask my why my response is going to be why not.  Maybe it is because I consistently work on my motto of Don’t Worry About What You Can’t Control and this fits perfectly.

Maybe it is because sometimes the best way to win the war is to pick and choose your battles. Small victories add up over time and they help build confidence.

Maybe it is because I spend far too much time sitting behind a keyboard and I need to do whatever I can to combat the sedentary lifestyle so many of us have fallen into.

Besides we are in the last quarter of the year and I feel the need to make a big push. 2012 hasn’t been terrible but it hasn’t been great. It hasn’t had enough high moments for me to want to look back upon it with a smile.

I intend to continue to do things to change that. The only question is will my good intentions come to fruition or will they stay here as words on a screen.

The Wii U

Last week I got to participate in a Wii U experience along with many of my fellow Nintendo Brand Ambassadors. I think it is a great unit and that it is going to be hell of a lot of fun to play with.

I played a bunch of different games but my favorite by far was the Batman game. It was really cool and I had great fun being the Dark Knight. If you click on the link you’ll see the video and I am sure you’ll be impressed. Trust me, the Wii U is on my list of things to buy.

But when I got home I looked in the mirror again and said, ‘self, you are soft.’

That is not what you want to say or think. Honest and realistic, but still not what you want, or at least not what I want.

Change is coming and 500 push-ups is part of my process. I owe it to myself and I want my kids to see we aren’t ever too old to take care of ourselves or to try to improve things.

Besides, when I own my castle I want all of the guards to know the Lord of the Manor is a badass who can take them all down. 😉

Who We Were Meets Who We Are

My children told me that they don’t want me to compete in any of the Tough Mudder events.  They watched videos like the one below and told me they are afraid I will get hurt.

Who We Were Meets Who We Are

It irritated me to hear them say don’t do it. I understand their concern for my safety and am grateful for it but it wasn’t what I expected to hear or what I wanted.

I think of myself as being somewhere being 19 and 25. I am still ripped in every way. All those hours in the gym and all of the hard work have made me into a beast and then I open my eyes.

I was that guy. It is not an exaggeration. I was 9% body fat and just solid muscle. I could eat whatever I wanted and I could move a mountain with little to no effort.

When I open my eyes I see a big beefy guy who looks like he can still throw the weights around, when he is not eating. I see a guy who could complete some of the existing challenges today, but would never finish the whole course without serious training.

What Are You Doing About It?

Part of what I like about an event like Tough Mudder is the focus on willpower and mental toughness. You don’t finish something like that unless you can do a little of the mind over matter bit so many people talk about.

I have the force of will to do these things. I have the strength, the fortitude and the mental toughness to complete it or so I keep saying. What I seem to lack is the discipline to do a better job with my diet.

There are regular periods of time where I get serious and I bear down. I watch what I eat and engage in consistent and serious workouts. My body changes.

How do I know this?

The answer is called: pants. I know this by whether I need a belt or not to wear my pants. If I need that belt than I know I am doing a decent job of cutting down on the calories and increasing the exercise.

When I don’t need to wear a belt than I hope that I have enjoyed some very fine meals because there is something irritating about knowing that you wasted all those calories on crap. If you are going to get yourself in trouble you might as well earn it.

English: This is a photograph that we have per...

English: This is a photograph that we have permission to use. We hired photographer Dmitry Gudkov to take this picture at our event on November 20, 2010. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I am not in that picture but I could be. The guy I used to be would have done it. He would have entered and loved every moment of it. He never could have imagined that one day the children who used to think he was Superman would be concerned he might fall into a Kryptonite mud puddle.

Here is the thing, I am the adult. I am their father and if I want to do this I can.

Even if I don’t enter I can still train. I can still get myself into shape, but will I.

Will I complain about their concern and lack of faith and leave it at that or will I just do what needs to be done. Meaning, will I prove to myself and everyone else that a 43 year-old man has the discipline and wherewithal to stop the clock and restore his hard body.

I guess you’ll have to wait to find out because I can’t answer that question now.

What about you? Have you any interest in competing in something like this?

Linking up with Dude Write.

The new Exercise Routine

This looks like a decent workout. Twenty years ago I could have done it without a problem, today I think that I need to focus on getting back to a point where I can do it again.

But what I really get back into is a swimming program. I am exploring options through the Masters program.

The Best Clothing You’ll Ever Own

The hard working team here at The Shack is constantly in search of products that you can use to make your life easier. Every day without fail our crack team scours the world to locate that one item that will add value to your day and improve the quality of your life.

Many of you may remember the pure joy and pleasure that my favorite towel has brought me.

Have I ever told you how relaxing it is to wear it. My entire being is filled with a sense of peace and harmony.

And have I mentioned how durable it is.

Hundreds of washes later it is as soft as ever and that is saying something, it is not easy being green.

It is indeed a quality product.

I don’t want to break my arm patting myself on the back, but I have a keen eye for fashion. And it is that keen eye that is responsible for locating the next item that I am about to show you.
In laymen’s terms we call it a wearable sleeping bag, far superior to that Snuggie rag.

But in reality it is an exceptional outfit that you can wear for business or casual events. It is highly functional and provides extreme utility. If you are one of the poor shlubs who is forced to live in a colder climate this is the kind of clothing you need.

Known as the Lippi Selk Bag it is available in a variety of colors and will keep you warm in semi-frigid temperatures. Please note the helpful safety tip from the FAQs:
What About Going To The Toilet? Is There A Fly?No. When visiting the toliet the Selk’Bag should be unzipped and pulled down.
Since I know that not everyone reads everything twice let me reiterate the importance of unzipping your bag prior to relieving yourself. The last thing that you want to do is have to deal with the humiliation of explaining to your mom or dry cleaner that you forgot how to use a zipper.
For those who have missed out on past reviews of useful products here is a list of links that you might find to be useful.