People

Email Scam Artists Are Fun To Play With

December 1, 2016 by Jack Steiner

Ten years ago I met a colorful character who called himself Shola Rhodes.

He sent me an email suggesting I work with him on a venture to make some serious money andÂ IÂ said I was interested.

Because when some stranger writes you out of the blue and offers you money you always say yes. Mama Steiner didn’t raise a fool, opportunity knocks and I enter.

I chronicled the adventure in a series of posts:

I had a lot of fun messing with that guy and that experience led to multiple new adventures, some of which I chronicled here and some of which I didn’t.

Speaking of which I need to take a look at some of those older posts because when they were imported from my old Blogger blog there were some formatting issues.

It is not hard to read, but it could look better. Chalk it up as another blogging task I need to get to.

Email Scam Artists Are Fun To Play With

I received a new scam email today and I have been playing around with sending a silly response back to it complete with a picture of me wearing a scary clown mask.

Dear Concern,

I am Talent Scout For BLUE SKY FILM STUDIO, Present Blue sky Studio a
Film Corporation Located in the United State, is Soliciting for the
Right to use Your Photo/Face and Personality as One of the Semi -Major
Role/ Character in our Upcoming ANIMATED Stereoscope 3D Movie-The Story
of Ferdinand (Ferdinand 2017) The Movie is Currently Filming (In
Production) Please Note That There Will Be No Auditions, Traveling or
Any Special / Professional Acting Skills, Since the Production of This
Movie Will Be Done with our State of Art Computer -Generating Imagery
Equipment. We Are Prepared to Pay the Total Sum of $620,000.00 USD. For
More Information/Understanding, Please Write us on the E-Mail Below.
CONTACT EMAIL: [email protected]
All Reply to: [email protected]
Note: Only the Response send to this mail will be Given a Prior
Consideration.

Talent Scout

I mean who wouldn’t want to engage with a talent scout so that you could make a quick $620k.

Funny thing to me is to think about how much has changed in 10 years and how in some ways I am far more relaxed and far more cautious than I was then.

Maybe it is because I have heard many more stories about ransomware and identity theft so my antennae go up with this sort of thing.

I tell my kids it is smart to be cautious but you can’t let fear dictate all that you do.

So I am sitting here mulling over not whether I could play with this talent scout but whether it is worth the time.

After all every time I read silly letters that are taken seriously like the one below it makes me laugh and I think about coming up with something new.

Hi Shola,I am trying to decide which bank we should use for this as I bank with several.

Cleveland Bank of Plunder and Spoil
1313 Mockingbird Lane
Cleveland, Ohio 44102
Personal Agent: Herman Munster

Barnacle Bob Bank of Mistrust
4 Is the Square Root of 16 Lane
Toledo, Ohio 44104
Personal Agent: Barney Fife

Dinah Mite Financial
69 Comelickmeclean Road
Bustedtuchus, Ohio 44018
Personal Agent: Hawkeye Pierce

Do you have any thoughts or suggestions as to which one you think would be easiest to work with? I have had many interactions with Mr. Munster as when I was young I used to watch him. So perhaps it might make sense to work with his institution of deceit, deception, distrust and dismay.

-Jack

The Agony Of Stupid Mistakes

November 29, 2016 by Jack Steiner

The kids and I talk about the importance of learning from our mistakes and how they can be growth opportunities.

I tell them there will never be a time in our lives when we don’t make them and say there are very few life-altering screw ups.

When they ask me to share some of mine I name a few but intentionally don’t mention some of the ones that jump out at me.

Some of it is because there are boundaries between parents and children and they don’t want to or need to know about certain things.

Move On

After I graduated from college I was hired to work as a writer and salesman for a publishing house.

It didn’t pay much but it was enough for me to have my own apartment and to cover all of my bills.

I Â have very fond memories of this time but there is one moment that sticks out as the sort of mistake you never want to repeat.

Her name wasn’t Kathy but that is what I called her and it happened after midnight during a moment when she had my full attention.

Don’t ask me why it happened because I can’t tell you. It just slipped out of my mouth and it didn’t take more than a moment for her to let me know how unhappy she was with me.

I didn’t try to cover or pretend I had called her Kathy because her name wasn’t close to it. Didn’t use the same first letter or rhyme, it was different.

She blasted me and I apologized…more than once…with sincerity.

Eventually she forgave me and the night continued but two or three days later our dating life came to a swift conclusion.

“I can’t forget what you did and flowers won’t fix it. It is time to move on.”

The Agony Of Stupid Mistakes

I wasn’t happy when she ended things but I got it. Besides it didn’t take long for me to realize that I didn’t really miss her which made it clear to me that we probably weren’t meant for the long haul.

But today what I am really focused upon is a mistake I made in a professional email.

****

It is not something that will kill my career or create huge issues and it might not even be noticed by most people.

Still it bothers me because it is such a dumb error on my part and the little niggling mistakes tend to irk me more than big ones.

That is because I see them as being so obvious and so avoidable I want to kick myself in the butt for being so foolish.

Since that is not possible nor useful it won’t happen. I’ll make a mental note to remember not to repeat this one and move on.

Random Thought

I stumbled across a couple of parent blogs who were running sponsored posts and wondered again how they got this business.

Their writing is poor and in desperate need of editing.

If that was me I would never hit publish because I would be embarrassed to have my name attached to that crap.

I know that is not nice and people can find errors in my work too, but the number of mistakes relative to the amount of content I put out is pretty low.

I suppose it bothers me to see that junk out there because we occupy the same space and their work reflects poorly on the rest of us.

That is a good segue into saying how disappointing it is to seeÂ writersÂ devalue the work of other writers by giving content away for free or for almost nothing.

Exposure doesn’t pay the bills and in many cases it does nothing to advance your career other than to convince others that they can hire free labor.

The Night I Played With Garth Brooks

October 22, 2016 by Jack Steiner

You might ask about my adventures in blogging or maybe you just need to read The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face.

Or maybe you need to know what it was like to sing Unanswered Prayers and More Than A Memory with him.

Maybe you need to know if the headline is link bait or if somehow I really did play with Garth.

I understand and I get it.

Every five pixels online is filled with another outrageous headline in which someone tries to get your attention.

So here is the story, I had a dream that I played with Garth.

The Night I Played With Garth Brooks

As far as I know this is the first time I have ever dreamed of playing with Garth, but not the first time I have dreamed of playing alongside various artists.

Springsteen and I have shared a mike and I have danced alongside Mick.

I have made Axel shake with anger because the crowd responded to me and ignored him and I have taught Sinatra how to sing.

That is the mind of a writer and a storyteller.

It is a snapshot of what goes on inside my head all the damn time.

Ask me if I have better dreams when I am awake or asleep and I’ll say I am not really sure.

That is because sometimes when I am awake and my mind drifts off like Walter Mitty I don’t let go the way I do when I am unconscious.

Instead of accepting that I am next to Garth playing guitar and singing I hold back because I don’t play guitar and no one is going to pay to hear me sing.

But if you come closer I’ll share a secret with you, I think I could write a song or songs that Garth would sing.

I think I could do the same for Bruce too.

It is because they sing stories and I figure I tell them.

Granted I know it is not as simple as I make it sound but I can picture it and sometimes that is all that is required to move from dream to reality.

Dream Or Die

Steiner the minor told me he thinks he might have one of the craziest fathers ever.

“Dad, you think you can tackle professional football players, hit professional pitchers and guard NBA players. You’re old enough to be their fathers too and you are not that big.”

I tell him about the guy who weighed 285 that I played basketball against last year.

“He was 6’5 and I blocked a shot and knocked him out of bounds twice while chasing after loose balls. Effort, will and belief will take you a long way.”

My kid shakes his head, “nothing personal, but I bet he sucks.”

“He does suck and a pro will be significantly better but they’ll probably underestimate me. They’ll see an old guy who looks like he is out of shape and that is when I’ll take control.”

“Dad, you might get lucky once or twice but after that…”

I shake my head and tell him I approach life in one way, “Dream or Die.”

Part of me is disappointed with his attitude but it is not because he doesn’t think I can do what I claim but because I want him to dream.

I want him to dare to dream of stealing fire from the gods.

I want him to look at the prettiest girl in school and think she might consider dating him.

I want him to believe he can do anything he wants or at least dream it.

What I can’t figure out now is if this attitude of his is just a phase or if it something more.

This parenting thing ain’t for the faint of heart, now is it.

And Somewhere In The Madness

October 18, 2016 by Jack Steiner

The full sentence reads and somewhere in the madness I lost her.

It is from a story I wrote long ago and perhaps it is part of one I am still writing but I’ll save that for tomorrow or some other day to share.

For now it is past midnight and I need to get some sleep but must put words on paper before shut eye time comes.

There is an ache in my stomach that keeps coming and going and I am certain it isÂ motivatedÂ by stress and curious as to why I can’t seem to kick its ass and send it away.

Been a while since I felt normal for extended periods of time and I am tired of feeling like it is a battle to get my butt in gear and out the door.

I look at my reflection and remind the guy staring at me to take control of the situation and the pressure will ease but that old bastard only hears what he wants.

I watch, listen and wonder about much of the world around me figuring there are more stories to be learned, shared and told.

There are some people I miss having as big parts of my lives and I can’t figure out if they are truly gone or just on their own walkabouts.

Inside my head there is an internal debate about whether to reach out and say I miss you or to chalk some things up to the etiquette of unfriending.

Twitter Lives/Twitter Dies

I need to set aside some time to write about Twitter and the reasons it lives or dies for some.

Have to figure out where and when because I have stories to return to writing and new ones to begin.

Mostly I need to remember if I want this stomach ache to disappear IÂ probably should start by shutting this down and getting some sleep.

Probably.

Don’t ask my kids to tell you how many times I say they ought to do as I say and not as I do.

One way or another I manage, but life isn’t meant to be just managed. It is meant to be lived and lived hard.

If you don’t laugh and love, what do you do that makes you know you are alive.

I Need A Better Password Manager

October 1, 2016 by Jack Steiner

I have too many passwords and the iron trap memory that I pride myself upon is starting to ask me why we are not taking advantage of other resources.

In a perfect world I’d consider hiring Baravelli. He might not be the best gatekeeper but anyone who makes you smile is worth keeping around or at least thinking about.

Take a gander.

The Impact Of Cellphones On Memory

Those of you who remember life before everyone carried a cell phoneÂ will appreciate why when some people called me a walking white pages was a compliment.

Telephone numbers and random trivia were always easy for me to remember. If I called you once there was a good chance I remembered your number, definite if it was twice.

But that was then and this is now and things have changed slightly.

Instead of dialing your number and benefiting from the repetition of tapping it out on a touch tone dial pad or even sticking my fingers in the number hole on a rotary phone I just touch your name/photo and the phone does the rest.

In concept, if I enter your number and information in my contacts there is a good chance I might remember it, or at least a chunk, but even that doesn’t happen as often as it used to ‘cuz tech has made it simple to just beam information over.

****

My kids will tell you I haveÂ gently lecturedÂ them about learning how to read maps because sometimes the map function on phones or the navigation systems in our cars don’t work.

They have heard me say “if you don’t use it, you’ll lose it. Exercise your minds, think.”

What I haven’t heard them say is “I can’t remember the passcode to my phone or I can’t remember the password to XYZ”

Does that mean their memories are better than mine or alternatively that mine is going?”

Absolutely not.

It means I have stuffed more than 47 years of information into mine and they haven’t. The giant hole between their ears isn’t filled with as much stuff as mine is.

Or more accurately, I have many more things to worry about and be distracted by than they do.

If they were to ever bust my chops about this memory thing I’d smile and say I love you and then tell them I follow the advice of a very smart man.

Eat Your Words

Since I share DNA and a bit of an attitude with my children I would expect to hear some kind of retort about how they’ll use that line in school upon their teachers.

Can’t say I would be completely against the idea of complaining about being asked to regurgitate information because I am not convinced being able to do so is of benefit.

I suppose there are some good discussions to be had about what things you should memorize because there are benefits and what doesn’t but I’ll save going down that particular rabbit hole for a different day.

And I’ll confess that I had to erase my iPhone because I forgot the passcode.

That is what led me down this path and started this post.

I didn’t completely forget it or totally screw it up, but I botched it enough times that I got irked and decided to start over.

Since I back up my phone daily I didn’t lose any data, just a few minutes of peace.

And I know for certain that what is behind this is my not being present.

Be Present Where You Are

If you juggle enough balls in the air and are constantly multitasking it is easy to miss things.

That is what happened to me.

Got a ton of stuff going on now, some of which is very taxing and I wasn’t focused on some things so I screwed up the passcode.

If I had given myself a day or at least slept on it I probably would have come up with the code and been fine but I was tired and frustrated.

Some of this crap is wearing me out so I said screw it and just started over.

It worked out because of good planning and being prepared for stupid things happening like tech failure or brain farts like just not remembering something I had done a million times.

I don’t like it and am not particularly fond of struggling to remember some things.

But I am not going to panic about forgetting stuff when eight million other things are happening, that is normal.

Still it makes me think that maybe the great brain could use some simple assistance in some areas, maybe I ought to get a password manager.

You Ought To Comment

September 17, 2016 by Jack Steiner

Work is the reason why I am living by myself again.

In theory it will be like this for close to a year or so but you never know for certain.

Life has a way of making your well-laid plans look a little less well laid and well thought out so it is possible this could be shorter or longer.

Don’t mistake that for having been said with a frown or tears because it wasn’t, there is a lot of joy and optimism behind it all.

I worked my ass off to put myself in this position and I am thrilled that things are going as they are and my fingers are crossed that they continue because of the benefits it provides my family.

This is the first time in years I can say I feel like I am providing for my kids the way I want to and the first time I have had such optimism in far too long.

Why wouldn’t I be happy and or excited.

You Ought To Comment

Steiner the minor has developed a bad habit of not acknowledging the texts or emails he receives from people.

I told him I don’t like this habit because it is rude and obnoxious and it is a good way to lose friends.

He told me it is common behavior so I compared notes with some friends and discovered it seems to be the truth.

I shouldn’t be surprised because parents seem to have trouble RSVP’ing for parties so why should I expect different behavior from their children.

We have been building a world in which we live in electronic bubbles where we point, click, slide and text our way into and out of conversations with others.

I won’t say I am not part of this society or don’t share any responsibility for any of this.

Nor will I say this is the first time I have noticed this because it is not, but it feels different to me now.

Maybe it is because I am walking around a new city and I realize what impact technology has had on my life.

*****

Thanks to social media and texting I don’t talk to people with the same frequency I used to.

Why call when Facebook has shown me the latest moments in their lives and or a quick text lets me know they are thinking of me or me of them.

If I was in LA I’d think about getting together and maybe put it off because I figure it is easy for us to get together for a few.

Yeah we’re busy, but we can find time, if we chose to that is.

Now I am 1,500 miles away so the in person stuff isn’t so easy but social media and texting makes it feel like I am right there.

It is almost like nothing has changed, especially when you hit the same chain of markets and stores here as you’d find there.

Homogeneity at its finest.

People

Email Scam Artists Are Fun To Play With

Â Life Is Too Short

Move On

The Agony Of Stupid Mistakes

Random Thought

The Night I Played With Garth Brooks

Dream Or Die

Twitter Lives/Twitter Dies

The Impact Of Cellphones On Memory

Eat Your Words

Be Present Where You Are

You Ought To Comment

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