Writing

When my children or people I know ask me to tell them about how I became a huge success I’ll tell them it was a simple path and point to the picture above.

Or I’ll draw a squiggly line and then when I know they are staring at it I’ll kick them in the ass, slap them across the face and poke them in the eye.

When they get upset I’ll tell them to suck it up and remember that life is full of surprises and not all of them are the kind that are nice.

Some are very unpleasant and are things we would choose to avoid or skip over, if we had the choice.

But we don’t always get that choice and more often than not we need to soldier through and get to the other side.

Don’t believe me?

Ask your parents and or do some reading about how to become successful and take a gander at the posts that tell you why failure is a good thing.

Really.

Yeah, some of that is serious and some of it is snark.

We’re More Than A Resume

Steiner the minor and I spent a few minutes talking about what is really involved in getting a job.

He was dismayed when I told him how the process works and explained you don’t always get an interview, let alone a response to your application.

“Dad, how can they do that? Don’t they know we are not just words on a page?”

“Technically they do know that we’re more than a resume, but sometimes the way they take the measure of a man is far too simple.”

Don’t mistake any of this to suggest that I am in between jobs because I am pleased to say I am not. I am employed full time and have been for more than a year.

It still feels and sounds funny to say that because my father had one job and held onto for almost forty years.

In the more than 20 years since I graduated from college I have held multiple jobs, several of them were for a chunk of years, but not all.

That bothers me, even though I know it is not entirely my fault and that the world has changed since my dad was a regular Joe with a daily grind.

But it is hard not to measure myself against him.

The man worked really hard and it paid off, he retired before he turned 60. I doubt that I am going to be able to do that.

It is ok with me, honestly it is, but there are moments where I forget about then not being now and wonder what I did wrong.

Accountability.

Ma and Pa Steiner taught me to be accountable and responsible for my actions. I have done my best to pass it along to my children.

But I have learned and come to accept that our control is limited and sometimes it doesn’t matter whether we are accountable or responsible.

I didn’t cause the layoff I got stuck in nor did I perpetrate 9-11 and wreak havoc upon people and companies that did business with a company I worked for.

Sometimes shit happens.

So I teach the children to be prepared to roll with things and I wonder if I should push them to adopt a trade or pick a particular line of work like Occupational or Physical Therapy.

Maybe I should push them to become doctors or nurses.

Healthcare is never going to go out of style.

But that doesn’t change the fact that dear old dad loves that Einstein quote above and thinks it is applicable to his life.

Or should I stop the third person crap and say my life.

I know that the people who look at my resume aren’t getting the full story or measure of who I am and what I have to offer.

It is not tied into how well it is written because the best resume only gives a short snaphot and synopsis and I don’t think mine is the best out there.

Good maybe, but not the best.

I want better, but mostly I want people to bring me in and hear me.

I want them to see me.

I want them to not let fear of mistakes prevent them from taking a chance on someone who may not hit every keyword listed in the damn job description.

We’re more than just words on a page.

We’re people with experience, skills and abilities that are transferable that can do more than just fill a desk.

The Bottom Line

That fire in my belly is burning bright and pushing me to move from the place I currently occupy into the one I know I need.

Push the envelope, stretch the limits and go beyond it all.

I can’t live a partial life. Can’t stomach a half measure.

Have to get more, have to do more.

The question isn’t when but how.

It is not even about money as much as it is about time. I know I can always find a way to make more money but I can’t make more time.

We’re more than just words on a page.

If you are here to read lurid and brazen tales of sexual conquests and social media I won’t be surprised.

That is because Five Stories Of Sexual Conquest In Social Media has been one of the most highly trafficked posts I have ever written.

Would you blame me if I tried to capture lightning in a bottle again by using a similar headline or would you accuse of me using linkbait and stupid blogger tricks to entice you to read my words.

If the goal is to get you to read and to think then there is nothing wrong with linkbait. Nothing wrong with pointing out that blogging became a popularity contestand sometimes we have to shake the tree.

I don’t know who that woman is or if she knows how to play the guitar but I liked the segue into the next section.

It made sense to me to talk about how I wish I knew how to play the guitar and how I would use my music to shake the damn tree and make some things happen but the only thing I know how to do with a guitar is just strum it.

But that is not really playing it, so unless I pretend to play it all I can really do is use it as a hammer, a shillelagh that if could be used in a more gentle manner to make people feel something and or encourage them to change.

What Happens When Nothing In Your Life Goes As You Planned It To?

I asked the question in March of 2012 never realizing that in less than a year my life would change in big and dramatic ways.

Never realizing this blog would serve as  the chronicle of those changes and make it possible for me to look back and mark some key moments in my life.

One day my children will ask me if I can tell them about certain moments in time and how some decisions were reached and I’ll point to the blog and tell them to read about it.

I’ll tell them the blog can be one of the most powerful resources they have for understanding themselves and others and suggest they write their thoughts down.

If they agree to flip through the pages and see what lies inside I’ll probably tell them to read posts like The Lazy Guardian Angel and wait to see what sort of questions they ask.

Mostly I’ll wait and wonder if they have any sense of how influential this blog has been upon their lives and mine.

The Power Of Writing- 12 Years

I turned 47 today, assuming that the clock hasn’t rounded past midnight.

In a couple of weeks I’ll celebrate my 12th blogiversary and think about all that has happened since that 35-year-old man started writing on a whim.

That guy had an infant daughter and a son was barely out of his toddler years.

He had a father on life support and a ton of uncertainty, not just about whether dad would live or die but what he was supposed to do to support his mother, siblings and grandparents.

That kid barely knew where to turn and operated off of gut instinct and took his strength from writing crap down on a screen.

Who knew that others would read it and that he would become friends with some of them or that the experiences he had there would make him turn his life upside down and inside out.

Do Things Happen For A Reason?

If I knew how to play an instrument or could sing I would answer the question with music and words.

Instead I am listening to Led Zeppelin play Kashmir and smiling broadly because I have lived, learned and loved enough to know there is something more out there but just what it is I can’t quite say.

There is something more than just us floating around the ether, something that helps to explain the things that happen for no apparent reason and covers what science cannot.

It doesn’t matter whether you agree or believe because I am not here to try and convince you.

I am only here to say I am convinced we have free will but that there have been moments that make me wonder what magic has helped to move me from one place to another to have introduced me to something or someone.

Ask me if that means I don’t believe in science and all that is tangible and I’ll say you are wrong. I believe in science and I believe there is something else.

I don’t care if it sounds hokey or ridiculous to you or anyone else. I am an amalgamation of all that I have learned and experienced.

Hell, there have been people I have met where I discovered a connection that was deep and significant.

A connection that shouldn’t have been felt so deeply and so quickly but it was. All it took was a moment.

So I live my life based upon what I know and what science has taught me but with an understanding that sometimes I pull the Joker from the deck and that Joker is wild.

****

There is someone out there I haven’t seen in years and I’d lay money down that if she kissed me once time would stand still and it would feel to us as if we were standing in the middle of a lightning strike.

That is the sort of moment and magic that convinces me there is something out there.

A Different Sort of Puberty

Steiner the minor has probably grown three inches in six months and his voice continues to drop octaves by the day.

He is not quite as tall nor is his voice as deep as mine but I see that happening sooner than later.

Sunday afternoon I watch him move some heavy items and I smile because I see how easy some of it is becoming for him.

His Steiner strength isn’t in full effect, but it will be soon and the day is coming when he’ll also be as strong as I am.

*****

I feel a bit like I am undergoing a different sort of puberty. My writing is better than ever and even though I may not always hit a homerun I feel solid and secure.

It reminds me of what it was like to be around 20 and to know that if I treated my body well it would take care of me.

This is why I have practiced and pushed myself to become a better writer. To move into a place where the skills were not that of a youth but the place that comes with adulthood.

What is coming soon will help me figure out if I am correct and if I have found the write stuff. We shall see.