The JackB

"When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'." Groucho Marx

Jack Steiner

Written In The Stars

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There are things going on now that have me shaking my head in both amazement and the occasional moment of disgust.

Can’t decide if I should try to explain or just use the song to illustrate it all, contradictions all around.

I had a dream last night,
The world was set on fire.
And everywhere I ran,
There wasn’t any water…
The temperature increased,
The sky was crimson red,
The clouds turned into smoke,
And everyone was dead.
But there’s a smile on my face,
For everyone…

That Lonely Place

Sometimes the life bus drops you off at that lonely place without any regard for your wishes or desires and then you have to figure out what to do with it.

You can drop your bags and unpack knowing you might be there for a while or you can take other steps and work on a plan for getting out of there.

There rarely if ever is a reason for an extended stay there but it doesn’t mean that you can choose the time and date you enter or leave.

If life were that simple it would be a very different world but it is not and smart people distinguish between the world we live in and the one we wish we did.

Doesn’t mean you can’t or shouldn’t work for better, just that you keep one foot planted on Earth so that you can take care of reality while working towards the other.

The More Things Change, The More They Stay The Same

I could tell you a story about the Shmata Queen and how I told her she would have to say ‘please’ but that is kind of risque and we’re short on time.

So I’ll share the second Oingo-Boingo video of this post and tell you the lyrics absolutely prove the more things change, the more they stay the same.

I always liked Boingo but I wasn’t as big a fan as some friends who went to thirty or forty of their concerts as opposed to the handful I hit.

Might have been two or three, heck it could be one.

Been about 24 or 25 years I think since the last show I saw at the Universal Amphitheater. It was one of the Halloween shows and it was phenomenal.

They didn’t need auto-tune or any studio effects and the crowd was filled with diehard fans who never stopped dancing and singing along.

I don’t recall if the venue held 12,000 or 30,000 people, just that I felt like I knew most of them or knew someone that knew them.

Was kind of cool, made it feel like a more intimate show.

An Extended Walk About

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Been on an extended walkabout thinking about many things such as posts like this one and one from a different blog.

One of those was applauded by a former sub commander, never know who you’ll run into within the wild and woolly blogosphere.

Been a strange time and I have had to fight my way through a few moments. Been thinking about whether those were smart moves or foolish and haven’t decided.

Might have to converse with SQ about it when she wakes up from her long slumber.

In the interim I am thinking about many things.

Sometimes that is what you have got to do to get to the other side. Courage friends, it takes courage.

Two Quick Thoughts

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Went back to an older blog where I compiled some stories and thought about picking up where I left off.

Read a few comments and smiled when I saw SQ say I just get relationships. Might have to talk to her about that and remind her to always listen to the Taurus. 😉

Definitely need to clean things up at the old blog, that place has been left mostly untouched for 13 years or so and it looks it.

Kind of a mess, but I can fix it.

Placeholders Continued

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Moving on from this post with thoughts about integrating these songs into a new post.

Song one

Song 2

Song 3

Got three or four ideas for a story inside my head and that is without thinking hard about whether they ought to be integrated into one or expanded into six or seven.

If you cared enough and took the time I could take you through the seventies into the eighties and into the present.

And hell, I might tell the tales anyway because I am that guy whomever that is anyway.

Or at least that is what someone said to me, “you are that guy” and I didn’t fight it.

I just nodded my head, smiled and said “you have no idea.”

That is what happens when you try to label me or pin me down. I don’t like it very much and I respond. Maybe it makes me juvenile or maybe it just means I am human.

Don’t think I am particularly different from many, I am just a man.


It Happens This Year

Made a decision about a few things a while back and decided I am going to get the answers and do something about them.

“It happens this year. I take action or drop it all and move on because it is time.”

Not sure who I was talking to when I said it, but I know I said out loud so it maybe it was for me. Maybe I had to say it so that I could my own voice and accept the promise I made to myself.

Sometimes that is what you have to do, speak out loud and hold yourself accountable to yourself.

After all, if you can’t do it for yourself than whom are you are going to do it for.

That is how we have to roll. Can’t be good for anyone else if you aren’t good to yourself.

Placeholders

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Can’t decide what to do about a few things. Can’t decide what to do with this blog.

Some people treat me like this guy because they can’t figure out what to do about me either.


Placeholders

Thinking about doing something with the links below, but haven’t decided so this is a post of placeholders.

Plenty Of Time

Timing

Asked And Answered

Fear Of The Unknown

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They say part of how you master your fear is to name and identify it and this will cause it to lose some power.

Well I named my fear Go Fuck Yourself and am not sure if it took the edge off of GFY because it still feels pretty damn real to me.

Not surprised to say it because I can’t self-diagnose this with the sort of accuracy I would like to and given I am not seeing the doc for a couple of weeks I’ll have to live with the discomfort of not knowing.

Cuz what is going on with me may be normal and something that is easily treated but it also might not be that. Might be bigger and more complex and that uncertainty is what is eating away at me.

Been pretty good at managing it all for quite some time now but the time to do that is past which is why I am going to see the doc.

Better to find out what I am really dealing with and take away the power of the mystery, take away the fear of the unknown.

It might be horrible and it might be nothing but bad news but then again it might not be anything close to that extreme.

Could fall between the polarities and the nagging sense of what if won’t be something that wakes me up because I’ll know.

Dragged my feet long enough and now I am going to get answers.

Kind of funny to think about how I would have told people not to do what I have been doing and that it is better to suck it up and get answers than to bury their head in the sand.

Call it do as I say and not as I do.

Anyhoo, I am taking action so we’ll find out if the fear of the unknown deserves the credit I have given it or if I can evict it from my head.

Time will tell.